A friend of our hooked up with the veriest slut-puppy who is insecure to the nth. He is not ‘allowed’ to speak or dance with us. When she breaks concentration to go to the Ladies, he comes over to say ‘hello, yeah, I know, but she’s really great when you get to know her’. I got the girls to run interference and lured him out to the parking lot to look at kid pictures.
The look of pain and fear on her face when she came trotting around the corner and saw us leaning against my car. I wanted her to be mad! Not scared! Not devastated!
I felt very mean-spirited. She’s insecure enough as it is.
I had a one night stand with a woman once,and she was just too damn fat for me.Every time she called me on the phone after that I would politely speak to her,but never(and I do mean never)say anything to advance the relationship.Eventually she got the idea,and left me alone.Sometimes playing dumb is to your own benefit,but it can be mean.
Sometimes, instead of feeding my cat, I scoop some food out of the box (very loudly) and then hold it over her head and let her stand on her hind legs for a while. Then I pour it back in the box.
But that’s about as mean-spirited as I get. 
I hope you mean the song, and not the man’s actual asshole.
My mean spirited thing (at least the only one I can think of off the top of my head) is I don’t let people merge in front of me in traffic. If there’s construction going on, they put up signs well in advance that says to merge. I merge ASAP after seeing the sign. If you go zipping along in that lane because it’s going faster and try to cut in ahead of people who merged when they should have - fuck you, you’re not getting in ahead of me. And just cuz you have your blinker on does not mean I have to let you in, so stop edging closer to my car. I’ll let you hit me too, I’m insured and have the right of way. You saw the sign 100 ft ago, same as me, but you wanted to wait till you ran out of road. Sorry buddy, wait for someone with less of an attitude than I to let you in.
I didn’t like a supervisor who was particularly anal so I would rearrange all the stuff on her desk every night. She was the type who left her stapler and her tape dispenser and her paper clip holder and her scissors all at the same angle, perfectly spaced - heh. Easy pickins. She never found them the same way twice in the AM either.
Another guy - I would take all of his staples out of his stapler every morning.
I demonstrated to a recent ex why, exactly, it’s a bad idea to use the same password for all of ones online things.
There is this really annoying old lady whos the hostess where I work. Everyone hates her. So what do us wonderful bus people do to her?
~Stack the menus up on the top shelf as high as they will go and just thrown up there any which way so they all come tumbling down
~Walk the menus up one at a time periodically to piss her off (yes it works! 
)
~steal her ash trays from the window sill
~throw away almost new cigarettes when she leaves them alone to tend to a customer
~currently, we are working on stealing her crossword puzzles so she has nothing to do sitting in her chair. :D
We’ve thought of and tried to do some other things, but it is the work place and you can only do so much before getting in deep trouble with the boss.
I guess you guys just got off on the wrong foot.
::d&r’s::
Well, among other things he was always puting his foot in his mouth…
cough
Okay, I’ll leave now…
I changed the profile for one of my AIM handles to say I was a 12 year old girl and mess with the heads of guys who would try to have cybersex with me. One time a guy who claimed to be 28 and who wanted me to run away and meet up with him wanted my number so he could call me, I gave him the number for the local FBI office, he called it twice before he realized what it was, and then I told him we traced his cc all and had his name and address now (I actually had it, but just by looking up his number on whitepages.com), told him the local authorities had been notified and to remain where he was so they could pick him up and read him his charges. Another time this guy gave me (again pretending to be a 12 year old girl) the password to his hotmail account so I could look at a picture of him he had in his mailbox. I went in, changed his password, and had a LOT of fun with his address book, including emailing chat transcripts of his conversations with me to all his coworkers, soliciting sex from all the female names on his list, etc.
Badtz, you are now my new hero. Way to mess with their heads!
hahahahaha just wanted to say that we did it!!
I never thought this was particularly mean, and that’s exactly why it is. When I tell my friends they react with disgust, or at least shock. I shrug it off like it’s nothing.
Anyway…
When I met my fiance, he was with another girl. They were pretty close too. I decided he should be with me. So I went to work on them. Pretty soon, I befriended both of them, but in particular, her. I used whatever information I had against her when talking to my fiance (her then BF) about her. Like, “Did you know the time she did (something or someone horrible).” Pretty soon, they broke up, and while playing the sympathetic friend, I moved in and started seeing him secretly. We were together for about a month before she found out. She was devastated.
I think there is nothing wrong with this because A)I hate that bitch, and always have and B) I loved him from the day we met.
Well, let’s see…
It seems to be my new hobby to make people cry if they are annoying little snots that just need to learn some manners. Not stupid stuff, mind you, but things I’ll bring up will be personal and also things that are defects to some extent, especially in their minds. For example, working tech made me a little stressed, so any shit I was given I gave right back to the point that the person who gave me the most shit ended up crying at least two days in a row from my verbal abuse. Another example that didn’t actually make the person cry is just finding something they do to “protect themselves” from what they find wrong with themselves and point out all its flaws and how stupid it actually is. Last example: today this girl whom I really don’t like because she’s a bitchy little princess 80% of the time was wearing something that was kinda slutty and ugly at the same time: something I reacted to by saying to her “Sluts ‘R’ Us must be having an Easter sale.” Yeah, it’s mean, but most of the time it’s deserved.
My newest mission in this area: to put this one freshman in her place and teach her that she has no authority and shouldn’t have an attitude or even dare to boss upperclassmen around when she hasn’t the sense to know what she’s supposed to be doing, let alone what everyone else’s jobs also. Oooooooh, and I know she’s touchy and insecure about her face/body. This one’s gonna be fun. ::evil laughter fills the air::
I got one up on you, Fran:
In fourth grade, there was a kid named–oh, we’ll call him Burt. Burt was an evil, evil jerk, but was smart and he hid it well from the teachers, so they all thought he was an angel. Anyway, one day in Spanish class, he was sitting behind me and kicking me. Repeatedly. Hard. Over and over again. The teacher was a stoner, and never had any idea what was going on in class, so I decided to bypass her.
Intead, I got up and sharpened my pencil. I waited for Burt’s next kick, and when it came, I grabbed his leg, rammed my pencil into the exposed flesh (he was wearing shorts), worked the pencil into the skin a bit, then SNAPPED THE POINT OFF UNDER HIS SKIN. He cursed me and held back tears, but was too proud to A) cry or B) tell the teacher. And he stopped kicking me, too. Victory!
[No, I’m not ashamed of this. I may have been a hurt, demented kid, but better a sharp pencil than an automatic weapon.]
Once I crank called a guy for a year. I was a freshman in high school and I was hanging out way too much with this senior from a nearby Catholic school. There was a kid in his class that he didn’t like, so he got me to call him up and say vile, disgusting things to him. At first it was just fun, but then it became an obsession. I’d call several times a day, send him obscene postcards and letters, I threw an egg at his house, and took part in a “mission” to put a potato in his tailpipe, which ended up causing expensive damage to his car, of course. Then he changed his home number to an unlisted one, and I started calling and harrassing him at work. Then the guy whose idea it originally was started cozying up to our victim, extracting details of how he (and his family) were dealing with our (really my) evil deeds, feigning sympathy. He’d come home from school and tell me about it, and we’d sit around and howl with laughter.
And the worst part is that I never met the guy. It was the sheer perversity of victimizing a faceless, innocent, random nobody that excited me. How fucking sick is that shit? I’ve thought about tracking the guy down and apologizing, but I don’t think it would do any good. He’d probably still want to kill me.
I superglued a tack to the roller of an obnoxious co-worker’s chair.
It was simple, but it was not removeable.
(looking at it)
“hmmmm, you must have really rolled over it” (pretending to be sorry for the misfortune)
I laugh everytime I hear her scoot across the floor: thump thump thump!
Ah, yes, the Net tradition of baiting…I know it well.
While it’s debatable whether baiting is really a good idea (I know some people have argued, perhaps with some validity, that it may backfire and make pedos more aggressive), frankly, I don’t consider it mean-spirited; more like a form of vigilantee justice (which may not always the prudent thing to do, but is often an understandable reaction). They IM you expecting to take advantage of a little girl after all. Few people have much sympathy for someone who wants to exploit a defenseless child.
Actually, I am glad to hear that you emailed the friends/coworkers of that one perv. Does that make me mean? Nah, it’s not just that I want him to suffer the humiliation. I would really like to think that due to your alerting the people around him to his tendencies, someone may be able to intervene and prevent him from hurting an actual child.