He’s already in therapy for other issues so it will be an easy transition.
I had to tell my five-year-old daughter that masturbating on the family room couch while the rest of the family was in the room was inappropriate and she should go to her room to do that. So I’m not too scared about talking to a teenager about sex and masturbation.
My parents never talked to me about sex. All I knew was what I learned from the Catholic church - sex is dirty business and if you masturbate you are a bad person. I spent my teenage years guilt-ridden because I couldn’t stop doing this awful thing. Fuck that. I’m telling my kids that masturbation is normal. I know that teenagers are uncomfortable with those conversations. I also know what happens when you don’t have those conversations. We’re having those conversations. They don’t have to look at me. They don’t have to speak. They just have to listen.
I did have a private shower, but I never found it possible to masturbate without reclining or laying down. So it was mostly doing it in toilet stalls or when my roommate was asleep or not there.
Particularly my second roommate, who was very, very strict about following Christianity rules exactly, especially the one about lust and the one about associating with people who said they were Christians but didn’t follow all the rules themselves. And he believed anyone who sinned intentionally after being saved could never be saved again. It would have been hard having roommate who couldn’t speak to me.
We had private showers; I did it in a toilet stall; I waited until my roommate was asleep or in the shower or had left for class; and I had a steady girlfriend who assisted me whenever necessary.
We had a competition to see who could have the grossest, crustiest cum rag at the end of the semester. The last day before we had to move out for winter break we tacked them to the wall in the common area and judged. I won.
I had pretty regular sex my freshman and senior years, but still took things into my own hands from time to time. My freshman year and the first part of my senior year, I had a single dorm room, so no problem. Sophomore and Junior years, I just made sure I knew what my roommates’ class schedules were and when they tended to be out of the room for [del]long stretches[/del] a while. Second part of senior year, I was in an apartment, so I could just close my bedroom door.
There’s this joke I can only half-remember… A father catches his son masturbating. “Son, you need to save that for when you’re married.” “But I do, I keep it in a glass jar!”
By the way, does having regular sex really remove the requirement to take things into your own hands for you guys? I had a pretty steady supply of female companionship for a period of a about a decade, but I can’t seem to remember that coinciding with a ten year masturbation hiatus. As in, at all.
No, it doesn’t. I’ve been married for fifteen years and we still have sex 3-5 times a week, but we also have multiple solo sessions. Well, I’m multiple, but she goes at least once/week.
I wouldn’t say “remove,” but certainly “reduce” the frequency. But if I’m having sex 3 or 4 times a week, that’s enough that I don’t usually need any extra. If we miss a few days, which happens, then sure.
I’m a 22-year-old girl who just finished college, so I can neither provide a male experience nor the experience of someone who went to college a looooooong time ago, but I would masturbate in a variety of places. My first year my roommate went to a Jehovah’s Witnesses meeting every Wednesday night, so I’d do it on my bed with a blanket over me in case she came back early. My second year I had more roommates so if I was really desperate I would go into a bathroom stall. Not ideal, I know, so it only happened once or twice. I never did it in a shower stall, because masturbating while standing up is harder for girls than for boys. My third and fourth years I was in a newly-built dorm which had individual toilet rooms instead of stalls. They were quite roomy so a girl could lay down on the floor and play with herself. They were clean, but not clean enough for my liking so I bought a big bottle of bleach and a mop and mopped everything - the floor, the walls, the toilet, the door handle, etc, before laying a blanket down on the floor and going at it.
Oh, that’s beautiful. If there’s anything I know about JW, it’s that they loooove masturbation. It will ensure you’ll be one of the 144,000 to get into heaven.