Well, hell. Might as well reveal a little more about myself in order to cause people to run screaming into the hills…
Hi. I’m John, diagnosed as depressive, then rediagnosed as manic depressive. One suicide attempt at 15, nearly institutionalized at 17, tried to run away from home at 18. Spent a cumulative three years in therapy with psychiatrists that in retrospect were near quacks; I no longer trust psychiatry, and I certainly do not trust medication for ‘personality disorders’ (an offshoot of not trusting psychiatrists combined with nearly overdosing on Lithium during one series of medication trips).
Thankfully, I’m currently in a relationship with someone who is also manic depressive, but we swing on opposite timeframes, so generally one of us is up and able to help the other one out when they’re down. No murder-suicide pacts for us, thankyouverymuch.
I just wanted to say a couple things about meds. They can be quite helpfull. they can be hell. They should be looked upon as a tool. For some people they work, for some they don’t. I’ve found them quite helpfull. Except in extreme cases they are not used to cover up your problems, they are used to help you cope with them. I have a friend on Prozac, he started out on a relatively high dose, and over a period of years has reduced it down to a tiny baby dose. Last year he attempted to go off completey, and was unsuccessfull. He still had issues. But, now he’s back on the tiny baby dose and is trying to work up to getting off it completely.
I know people are distrustfull of meds and psychiatrists. I’ve had a few bad ones. But, most of them are just trying to help. The other thing to remember abou meds is that you taking them is voluntary. There is nothing wrong with going to a doctor and having them diagnose you and perscribe meds. If the meds don’t work, talk to your docotr, or just stop taking them.
The other thing is in regards to matt_mcl’s comments about taking alcohol and marijuana. Not to beat on you or anything. You’d like that too much but… as someone who has had serious problems with self medication I really need to talk about this.
I’m no anti-drug person. Currently, I do (infrequently) drugs such as; alcohol, pot, lsd, coke, speed, E, K, and 2cb.
However I’ve learned to use these drugs in moderation and be very carefull about my mood around the time I take them. All of them worsen my condition. I’ve had rough times because of careless drug intake. The worst is alcohol. It’s very easy for me to put down 8 or 9 beers without even thinking about it. Sometimes I’m fine, sometimes I’m in a really bad state the next day. Your drug intake might not be helping, but could be causing your condition. Or at least exhasperating it.
Well, I’ve been diagnosed with dysthymia and have been off and on (currently off) medication (Zoloft and Wellbutrin) over the past three years .
For a long time prior to my diagnosis, I always felt as if there was something wrong with my personality. I couldn’t seem to relax and enjoy certain things or express my feelings when the occasion warrented it. After going to a doctor and taking medication for a while, I noticed a dramatic difference in my mood and outlook on life. Also, after a brief stint in counseling, I realized I had had a major depressive episode when I was 13 (I’m 37) that probably contributed to my dysthymic condition.
In my case, at least, the medication I took did make a difference in my condition, and I would recommend their use. That being said, however, I strongly feel that medication should be used in conjunction with counseling for those who have had to deal with depression in its various forms. The drugs altered my mood and made me feel better, but I feel if I hadn’t gotten counseling as well, I wouldn’t have discovered was triggered the condition in the first place.
A long long time ago I was locked up in a nut house. I was sent there by the cops for not having answers for the “cop questions.”
(You know, who are you, what are you doing, where are you going, where do you live? Cop questions.) Turns out, even though there is no right or wrong answer to the cop questions, you have to have answers. I didn’t. In Virginia, they used to take you to the nut house if you were otherwise harmless, but were obviously not living life according to some sort of recognizable plan.
So, they diagnosed me as having a suicidal depression, and gave me lots of drugs, and tests, and therapy. The drugs made me sleep all the time, and the other stuff seemed to indicate that I would be best served by practicing living by a strict schedule for a while, and planning things in progressively longer increments while I was in the Hospital. It seems that it worked.
I am fine now. I have habits rather than a schedule, or plans, but it looks the same from outside. I have a job I love, and it makes me happy. If I am nuts, it seems that I am passing, anyway.
I won’t go into huge details, but I was on Paxil when I found out I was preggers, so quit cold turkey. Unfortunately, I experienced what they call a “rebound effect.” You really ARE supposed to wean yourself off of those things for a reason.
My father is a PharmD (doctorate in pharmacology), and he took it upon himself to research all this (short version) and he suggested that I combat my problem (at least while preggers) with foods high in natural seretonin. Damn if it didn’t work for me! Remember, I am a LOW-LEVEL depressive though!!!
There is so much more to it and I am ceratinly NOT recommending this as a cure to anyone with mental problems. I’m just saying that it helped me until I could go back on Paxil.
Anyway, some foods high in natural seretonin:
Plaintains
Bananas
Pineapple
Tomatoes
Walnuts
There’s more, but IIRC, those had the highest amounts serving wise.
A few months ago, I went to the doctor, because I could not deal with the fact that I had next to no sex drive, and it had been like that since the birth of my daughter three years ago. After a lengthy discussion, my doctor recommended Wellbutrin. Of course, there was more to it than the lack of sex drive, but if I wrote everything down, you’d be reading my post for three days.
I was a bit scared of the Wellbutrin, because I’m epileptic. But I haven’t had a seizure in over two years, so my doctor thought the Wellbutrin would help. My doctor was right. I didn’t even realize that I might be depressed until I actually started feeling better. I had grown so accustomed to being “sort of bummed out all the time” that it became normal.
I went to a psychiatrist a few weeks ago, to get a regular prescription. The psychiatrist immediately took me off Wellbutrin (he wasn’t comfortable with an epileptic taking it) and switched me to Celexa.
My physician may have been right about the Wellbutrin, but after being on the Celexa for a few weeks now, I have come to believe that my psychiatrist is a freaking GOD. The Celexa is working better than the Wellbutrin ever thought about working. My work output has increased. I actually have the desire to do things, like the housework I chronically put off because I “just didn’t feel like it.” Instead of being sort of bummed out all the time, now I’m “fairly happy most of the time.” Problems have solutions. I can deal with the stress.
I am in counseling too, and the combination of meds & talking really helps.
You know it’s funny. Many people are depressed and don’t realise it. Only when they start taking meds do they realize what it used to feel like to be normal. That “oh, yeah I used to enjoy life and I’m doing it again” feeling.
Paranoid schizophrenic with social phobia, agoraphobia and severe depression, not to mention anxiety. Being treated with a drug cocktail which I don’t think does much except keep me civil. I gots problems.
I’m pretty new to the boards, but would like to stop and wave to everyone.
Really surprised by some of the people I’m recognizing on this thread; you really never know 'til people let you know.
I’ve been diagnosed manic-depressive for 4 years, since I was 21. I was studying for my finals in college & leading a straight & narrow life, when I looped out into mania. I’m glad I was not messing around, because then my family and friends couldn’t blame what happened to me on my lifestyle.
But I do have lots of family crap in my background, so on that count people did tend to give that some thought.
I was hospitalized in a few places during that one episode, as I had to change hospitals after I hit the cap for mental illness on my parents’ insurance & had no insurance of my own. It was very debilitating.
I will always be grateful to Lithium for helping calm me down. Ativan helped me sleep, but Lithium helped me sustain the calm.
A lot of people can function to varying degrees without medication, but I was so frenzied that I had to get help.
And since I’ve stayed on Lithium, I find that when I get angry my head doesn’t shoot off my shoulders & hit the ceiling (xcept for perhaps during PMS). ’ ) And the side effects (tremors, etc.) went away after a few months.
I returned to school after being manic and am now graduating with a Masters in Information Science in a month.
I also have a twin brother, but he doesn’t have Bipolar Disorder.
I was thinking that someone could do a “Ask the Manic-Depressive” thread; I’ve only had one manic episode, so I don’t think I’ve had enough experience.
I used to have severe major depression years ago
but I’m a-ok now ;). Come to think of it I basically had my mid-life crisis when I was 15, it was really bad. I’m surprised I’m still living after the enourmous amounts of drugs and incredibly crazy things I did.
But I have found a love for life now and have resolved all my past issues. I wish the same outcome for all of you with major depression. You will break through someday…you will
I’ve been diagnosed with about 10 different
labels, but medication doesn’t seem to improve
me at all. At various times, I’ve been labelled
bipolar, austistic, depressive, manic, paranoid,
Multiple Depersonality, addictive personality, etc.
Something’s not right, but nobody can figure
out what’s wrong. I just keep going on.
I’m only self-diagnosed because though I ask my mother if I could have a diagnosis of my problems, she’s always in denial that her lovely daughter could have any mental illnesses. Also, whenever it gets extreme with me I don’t tell my family.
Self-diagnosed clinical depression, possible bipolar, extreme fear of driving a car (don’t have a permit or license), OCD, and anxiety disorders.
I have these abandonment issues for some reason. My parents are happily married so I don’t know where that comes from. Maybe I’m just oversensitive to rejection or something.
I had a self-mutilation problem for a while there; luckily the last time I cut was June 17th of this year. I also attempted suicide but (obviously) failed. Thank God I’m still here!
I can’t believe I’m confessing all this…okay, I’m done rambling…
I have a communication disorder or something like that. Saw a shrink when I was 17. Not very good. That’s what he told me. Read it out of some book. Never went back to him though, 'cause he didn’t really make me feel very comfortable. And it all started because I wasn’t doing so hot in school and showing up for class and because my folks complained to the school that I was acting strangely (could have been all the acid I did) and just because I threatened to hurt my folks for all the abuse I took as a child… well, gosh, I don’t think I have a problem…
i could never had said that so well. very, very true.
[QUOTE] Originally posted by iampunha
**I sometimes find myself having theoretical conversations and displaying various facial expressions. This isn’t due so much to having voices in my head as to being prepared for various scenarios that might arise. Sounds odd to some of you, I know, but I like to be prepared for various things that might present themselves, such as an attractive, single female etc. **
[quote]
yeah me too. a lot of times, i find my self making faces associated with the text as i read.
clinical depression here. pretty much for three years, with short breaks in between. didn’t see a doctor until january. asked to leave college twice.
I’ve been reading through this particular thread and several of you have mentioned dysthymia. I’ve never actually been diagnosed by a real doctor for this, but it sounds like what I have. I also have problems with what I’m pretty sure is a food addiction (try solving that one, what am I supposed to do, stop eating?). I don’t go off on crying jags, but I find myself becoming rather apathetic about things lately. My house is a mess…so what? It’s noon and I’m still in my pajamas…who cares? I’ve only been truly suicidal once, about nine years ago, but there were extreme extenuating (sp?) circumstances going on in my life at that particular time.
but… as someone who has had serious problems with self medication I really need to talk about this.
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