I found the most adorable sunflower wallpaper so at the spur of the moment, I am remodeling a bathroom. I have to wait for the fumes of the wallpaper stripper to clear, so here I be for a few minutes.
While I was out mowing my 10 miles worth of lawn, (or so it seems, gotta love Saturday :rolleyes: ), I was doing my usual thinking about weird things. Mowing is SO exciting.
Today I was thinking about a couple of widows I know who have been through very different experiences.
A 25 year old that works in my office. Two years ago, when her oldest son was 3 and she was pregnant with her second baby, her husband was diagnosed with brain cancer. He died soon after before the baby was born. Although she makes good money and is financial secure, she has had a horrible time emotionally. I have a great respect for her strength, I don’t know if I couldn’t have managed the things that she has.
Another woman in my office whose husband died in a small plane crash 4 years ago. He had let his life insurance lapse, other money was left to their kids, and after his death, she discovered mountains of debts, including two mortgages on the house. During their marriage, she was a stay at home wife and mother, he was a fighter pilot for the military. He also handled all finances, so she had quite a few surprises after his death. She had to start over, go back to school, and into the job world. Understandably, she is very angry with him.
My grandma and grandpa were very much in love during their 57 years of marriage. He died two years ago at a ripe old age. My grandma misses him terribly, but knows that he had a long and happy life. He also left her very well off financially.
My daughter’s friend lost her dad a couple of years ago. He had taken off from work early to pick up a special present for his wife. It was their 20th wedding anniversary and his 40th birthday. A few miles from home, a truck ran a stop sign, hit his car killing him instantly. The family still has a very hard time with his death. However, he left them set for life. Not only did he have a couple of high life insurance policies, he had a clause written into his property insurance that paid off the house fully upon his death. He also had some type of death pension through his employer, and the automobile insurance paid out.
After his death, they sold their home and bought a brand new, gorgeous, huge home, filled it with new furniture and landscaping, two new cars, and a European vacation. All paid with cash.
He had made investments so his widow will never have to work a day in her life. To keep busy, she works part-time, setting her own hours at a candle shop. She loves her job. She also does a lot of volunteer work. She also has all of her bills (phone, gas, etc.) taken directly out of her account, so no monthly bill paying hassles.
Life is good.
I know I am going to get spanked for saying this, and I half expect to hear from a certain poster who :rolleyes: lost respect for me a while back. However, I am only being truthful (would you rather I B.S. y’all with sugar coating?) and if this makes that certain poster lose even more respect for me, well let’s just say I’ll put it right there in my list of things I lose sleep over, right there under “#9967 - Chapped asses.”
Of course, if it were MY chapped ass, I would have to rephrase that last comment.
Anyway, I really am not a heartless, cold bitch - really, it just makes me wonder what type of emotional pain I would be willing to go through if the results were tempting enough.
No matter what the financial benefit, I would never want to lose a husband like the lady mentioned in #1. I can’t imagine being a young widow with two small boys.
I would also not want to be in widow #2’s situation. The pain of losing a husband, the anger, and starting over late in life would almost be too much to bare. Did I mention that she is 56 years old?
I think it would be a comforting feeing to be widow #3, my grandma. She is 84 years old, financial and physically capable, and although she misses my grandpa, believes that she will see him one day soon.
This is where my dark side emerges just a little.
Whenever I see the lifestyle widow #4 is living, not just the big home, cars, etc., but the non-stress of a job and bills, I think to myself, “Damn, I could suffer through mourning for this!” Not to wish anyone dead (I’m not married) but I think I would have a fairly easy time sliding into that kind of lifestyle.
How about it, dig into the deepest, darkest, depths of your soul and confess. If given a choice, (hypothetically, I’m not endorsing killing off spouses here so put down the rat poison) would you be willing to trade the life of your spouse for an extragavant lifestyle where you had nothing to worry about for the rest of your life? What if you were still young enough to enjoy things for many years to come, maybe one day even finding someone to share it with?
The bathroom walls calleth to moi’. Hummmmm, do you think it wants to propose?