Lengthy lament about something seemingly trivial:
So, I went in for a haircut yesterday and decided to do something wild and go for the scorched-earth approach. I’ve had pretty short hair for some time-- usually a sort of bob about nose length. I decide to try the quite short layered Winona Ryder kind of thing (although I’m blond). Well, it ended up a bit too short on the sides, and top for that matter (although I didn’t realize it at the time, with the shock of such a new hair length).
And apparently while wispy girls with delicate faces can get away with this haircut and look feminine and pixie-like, I have a rather prominent jaw and dress pretty boyishly. So I wasn’t quite sure what to think of the results, until my husband more clearly than he intended made his opinion known: “Ah. . . um. . . that’s much shorter than I was imagining. I hope you’re ready to get hit on by girls in bars. . .” And you know-- he’s right, and I’m not happy. I’m already on the verge of gender-ambiguity, fashion-wise, and have been trying to make some accomodations to femininity (perhaps the hairdresser thought I was gay and thought this was what I wanted?). I thought this haircut was a step in that direction, but the cut turned out different than I expected (more like a crew-cut than medium-length toussled on top) and apparently I am not one of those women that can get away with it-- instead of cute, pixie-like, I look like the stereotypical idea of “butch” (less “boy-ish” than “Boy?”. Less Winona Ryder than Brigitte Neilsen (which isn’t, to me, a good thing)). I’d have to dress significantly more girly than I am accustomed to compensate for the ambiguity of the haircut to achieve the cute-hetero-girl-with-short-hair goal here.
So, fashionable dopers. Any advice on how to live with a haircut that I find embarassing to be seen with outside until it grows out a bit? (I think it will look much better when it’s an inch longer-- how fast does hair grow, anyway?) Unfortunately, it is so short that no corrective measures are possible (any shorter would be “shorn”). Styling tips for something this short? Any vitamins I can take to make my hair grow faster? Yes I know this is not the end of the world, but I’m already insecure about my appearance and this is bugging me to a perhaps irrational degree.
Earrings. Big, dangly earrings. And pink lipstick.
Ah yes…“female gym teacher” hair. I unfortunately know it well, due to a horrible short-cut in college. I didn’t really care if anyone though I was gay, I just didn’t like the way it looked in general, since I already tended to dress more hiking boots & jeans than pretty dresses.
Tips for liking your style:
Earrings. Pretty dangly earrings.
Take steps to make your skin look great.
Shiny lip gloss.
Try to find cute little jeweled bobby pins or barrettes.
You are blonde, so think “Sharon Stone” or “Gwyneth Paltrow” - 2-3 years ago when she had that great short cut. I bet you’ll like it the more you get used to it. And hair grows faster in the summer months! I look back now at pictures from the Year of Short Hair and it really wasn’t so bad!
Maybe some jewelry would help? It doesn’t have to be all that girlish, just items that men don’t usually wear somewhere near your face. A pin isn’t too much trouble.
If you don’t mind makeup, even just lipstick does a long way toward cueing, “I’m not trying to look like a boy.” Do not go heavy on the makeup because that will look more like you are in drag but have a day job that requires you to have short hair. Thick makeup can look like an attempt at beard cover.
You could try a bit of false hair. A wig for a few weeks may not be all that bad.
I have seen those headbands (that are horseshoe shaped and you wear over your head usually to pull you bangs back) covered in a natural looking hair braid. That may not look bad at all.
Scarves. Female pirate. Arrrr. Or you could throw caution to the winds and get it cut really short, like Sinead O’Connor short… naaahhh.
And I believe hair grows about 1/2 inch per month.
I’m not particularly fashion-conscious, but some thoughts:
(1) This could be a great opportunity for you to experiment with more girly clothing. Just for kicks. You and/or your husband may like it.
(2) Consider a wig or hair extensions. Not the best option, especially if you live in a warm climate, but doable.
(3) Hi, Opal. This is starting to get old.
(4) Dye/streak it with a shocking color, like bright blue. This worked for a friend of mine, though she wanted her hair that length. And there was no question about her orientation or gender; very hetero girl, and I wish I’d had a chance with her.
(5) Suck it up and wait for it to grow out. It can’t be worse than what my brother did one night, when he got a crewcut and let a frind’s GF bleach his brown hair blonde. didn’t touch his mustache though. I was tempted to buy him leather shorts and a biker cap to complete the image. :rolleyes:
Good luck.
Experiment with it a bit, it may just need some different styling products. I had this happen to me about 1.5 years ago and I found it looked best (if you can call it that) really messy and sort of sticking up.
Meanwhile, go to Target and buy some big hoop earrings, nailpolish and red lipstick. Use them religiously.
Cruise by the GAP for some of their “camisole tops” with “built-in support system”. If people can see that you have breasts, it avoids the dreaded “Excuse me, Sir” syndrome.
Good luck, I know how you feel.