Mildest Bill...

Bill Ding?

funny, I was just about to ask the SAME thing.

For the lover of cannabis and seasonally flooded wetlands–

Bill-a-bong.

For the truly jaded advertising exec–

Bill Bored

Or he could have his own equivalent of the SDMB and be Bill Board.

Or how about a huge and overeducated Bill Dungsroman?

If he never posted but always lurked, he’d be InvisiBill.
In an apocalyptic thread, he could be the Last Will and Testment.

If he were ingenious, maybe we would say that when there’s a Will, there’s a way.

SupposaBill

IgnoraBill

Bible-est Bill

Bye-Bill

SeethruBill

Silenced Bill