Wait, don’t you have those sensors that prevent the door from closing on anything in its path? That’s a lot more effective than some stupid stickers. I thought they came with all new garage door openers.
Yep, there are sensors. The 8x10 sticker is there for the one-in-a-million chance of the sensor failing.
I’ll be taking the new stickers off tonight. We have no little kids. If a little kid wanders away from home and the sensors fail, well, the kid probably is too stupid to read the warning.
Let’s assume that the minimalistic thread title builds character, ey?
Last week: “Gosh, I really wish I would come into some money so I could buy a new car.”
<Transmission on my car decides it doesn’t like working 100% of the time. 
>
Today: “Gosh, I think I’ll buy a new car. Looks like I can scrape together a decent down payment…”
I had a hard sneeze and pulled a muscle in my chest.
That’s right. I have chest pain from a fucking sneeze!!
If you ever want a new username: Mighty Sneezer 
To the so-called journalists running the “rogue planet will destroy the earth” story today, kill yourselves. Every single one of you, just get your choice of gun, put the barrel in your mouth, and pull the trigger. Inciting terror for pageviews is seriously fucked up.
Yeah, that bugs the crap out of me “Two comets headed straight for Earth!!!”
Um, NO. The closest approach will be 32 million miles. For counterpoint, the closest Mars ever comes to the Earth is 34 million miles.
I hate the holidays for making me seem ungrateful. I’m a 50yo engineer, single, no kids: I have lots of disposable income. I don’t need presents.
Every holiday or birthday it’s the same routine - I insist I don’t want presents, even though I’m going to get my nephews and niece presents (since they’re kids, and they don’t have money), I don’t need something in return. And every year, I get a boatload of crap I don’t want, don’t need, and won’t ever use. Even the gift cards are for things I have no use for: movie theaters I don’t go to, restaurants I can’t eat at.
Usually, my brother’s family at least gets me an Amazon gift card. But this year… Omaha steaks. I don’t eat red meat - can’t handle it anymore. Haven’t eaten the stuff for years. And I live alone. Utterly useless. Didn’t want to ruin the moment when they told me the good news, so didn’t point that out, but Omaha steaks was supposed to call or email to arrange delivery.
Well, just found out that what really happens is that Omaha steaks emails you to tell you when you’ll be getting the delivery and that there’s no option to change or cancel it. Even though I could have substituted other things I didn’t want at this point, there’s nothing they can do to cancel it. Ooh, sorry.
They suggested I throw it out if I didn’t want it.
So I basically just told my brother he’ll be getting his fillets back. Making me look like an ungrateful ass because no one will actually listen to what I tell them. I’m thinking I might slip my nephews the theater gift card, and maybe the restaurant gift cards, when no one is looking, too.
Humbug.
I pinched a nerve in back after coughing. Getting old sux.
Yeah, I’ve got relatives that will spend a ton on postage (big boxes from Seattle and Japan) to send candy and chocolates (not even the good dark stuff … cliche “candies dipped in milk chocolate”).
To a house where everyone’s watching what they eat.
We’ve been biting our tongues and parceling out the sweets to neighbors.
And taking armloads whenever we go to a meeting. It’s not bad… we look like we’re being generous: “Hey, you brought those chocolate covered Swedish Fish like you do every January! Yum!”
GAH. USPS tracking service sucks donkey balls so hard. Waiting for a package that I know was sent 2nd day air. The only update for the last 24 hours is that it left the state of Kansas yesterday. No idea if it will arrive tomorrow like it should, and trying to coordinate plans with a friend to pick it up. All I can do is text her if I see it come into the nearest sorting facility at some point tonight if it posts before 2am or so, and she’ll get the text in the morning after she wakes up and have to make last minute plans. Which she will be expecting, but still, would have been nice to be sure today. Boo.
Jesus. In October sent me a stupid gift (a vest I’m seriously never going to wear). It had to cross the border from the US to Canada, and unfortunately when it was shipped whoever sent it forgot to pay the duty. Now UPS has been after me for months to pay the damn thing, and they actually refused to allow my employer to charge it to their account. 
After dipping them in chocolate, I hope.
As long as it’s not too heavily personalized, I’ve found that local thrift stores will take the boatload of crap – and give you a donation receipt, too. 
In my [extended] family, once you’ve expressed an interest in one thing, that’s all you get for presents. For instance, my dad happened to mention once that he had purchased some golf clubs, and he was still receiving piles of golf-themed tchotchkes long after he had stopped playing. My poor mom keeps receiving novelty barware…all because she mentioned one time that she prefers a particular spirit. My stuff is hit or miss…most people send me gift cards (to places I actually shop), but I still get some decorative stuff that makes me wonder. I recognized one item I received this Christmas from a catalog; it was surprisingly expensive, it’s very a seasonal item, and I really lost interest in that sort of thing many, many years ago. I think someone would have a use for it though.
In my case, the annoyance is usually that it’s sucking up my time getting rid of this crap. It’s like being punished for getting crappy gifts.
Amazon’s Give Back Box program may cut down on that hassle though, now. Alas, I didn’t get any Goodwill-worthy stuff this year.
Not to be an ungrateful dick, but wouldn’t it be easier to find a goodwill than a UPS dropoff? At least for me; I drive past 2 donation centers on the way to work, while UPS is out of the way. If I’m making the effort, I’ll drop it off myself.
I wonder if they’ll take a donated Harry & David assorted chocolates gift box. We certainly don’t need the candies and nuts, and eating them means acknowledging the sister who is “too busy” to drive an hour and a half to see us and/or her cousins and elderly aunt and uncle once a year, but can spend her money on token mail order gifts.
Pretty sure Goodwill will just toss a box of delicious edibles. If you don’t have a workplace to pawn off your consumables, consider the nearest emergency room, whether human or animal. I can tell you for sure the front desk people will take your gift with delight and it will be taken back to the Treatment Room and consumed within 90 minutes.
Could you give the steaks to your local food bank? Maybe change the delivery address to the food bank so you don’t have to even deal with it?
Yep, excess food gifts always go to work. If you happen to like the container the food was packaged in, remove that before placing your offering in the break room.