As** even sven** says, it’s all about who the kids are. My friends were very trustworthy (as I was) and our parents knew it. When I was a freshman in high school one family in our group moved away; the brother and sister were both our friends. We immediately began weekend trips to their house which lasted through college. At first boys and girls were strictly segregated, but it eventually it morphed into “everyone crashes in the living room” and people who were seeing each other did toss their sleeping bags side by side. Nothing more than smoochie occurred as far as I know. (That’s all I engaged in, at least!)
My 12-year-old son spends the night regularly with his friends, and they with us. I don’t understand why that’s weird. And throwing balogna at each other sounds like typical boy behavior, perciful!
Wait, so at all-girl sleepovers there’s no bologna-on-ass contest? :dubious:
As far as the mixed sleepover thing, that one kid on Clarissa Explains It All was able to climb a ladder to Melissa Joan Hart’s room whenever he wanted, and they never got to fuckin’, so it must be okay.
By the way, Perciful: your son has issues, or he’s fucking with you. I’m inclined to think it’s the latter.
ETA: I got to see an interesting counterpoint to this first-hand with my wife’s parents. We’ve spent Christmas Eve with them for the last four years. We slept in separate rooms, even though we were already living together. This past year, they put us in the same room for the first time… so apparently it’s also okay after a certain age. I should mention that this last year was the first where we were engaged (and this next one will be the first now that we’re married).
I’d say OK up to about age 8 or thereabouts. And even then, only if there’s an adult in the room. After that there start to be big enough gender differences, plus kids can be EVIL little shits (spoken as the parent of two such ELSs).
I never had mixed gender sleepovers, but I went to plenty of boy sleepovers as a kid. It was all about playing video games and drinking liters of pepsi all night, then peeing a lot and going to sleep. My kids had mixed sleepovers until they were 10, but they were our neighbors and had known the kids for years so we knew them pretty well. I would allow mixed sleepovers now, and they’re in their teens. However, 1) They’d stay here in the house at all times 2)I would be home and awake all night to supervise and 3) I can break up the party at any time.
Maybe in some cheap neighborhoods. I certainly wouldn’t buy anything less than imported prosciutto for my child’s sleepovers.
I slept over at my buddies house all the time when I was a teen. Its where I learned to smoke AND drink. Both my boys had sleepovers, although anything involving more than one other kid was always a birthday party situation. Lunch meat was never abused that I know of. Didn’t allow mixed sex but both kids did go to mixed sex sleepovers at others houses, which I didn’t much like.
I had sleepovers when I was a kid up to my teens with guy friends.
Usually we’d play videogames, talk about girls and then make crank calls to people late at night.
Then sleep.
I remember my soccer team had a sleep over cuz we had early practice the next day.
There’s a problem where “sleepover” has certain connotations. I’d never have a sleepover with my guy friends. It just sounds girly. But I might have a few friends “spend the night.”
My church used to have co-ed sleepovers, and the age was pretty irrelevant. Talking with my younger friends, I’ve discovered they’ve become more like lock-ins, i.e, everyone must stay up all night, and every kid must be accounted for at all times. Still, the worse thing that happened when they still had sleepovers was a little kissing. We just have paranoid parents (some of which would rather keep their kids in all girl groups until college.)
I voted OK before a certain age, but don’t have a specific age in mind. Definitely if they’ve hit puberty, too old, but below that, eh, depends on the kids, depends on how the mixed-sex kids are around each other etc. It’s not something I think where one rule fits every situation.
I chose the fourth option, but an older kid would be insufficient, as would be any adults I didn’t know well enough to trust. There are babysitters and parents that let the kids do whatever.
But, then again, even non-coed sleepovers need some form of supervision, at least until one reaches adulthood. Until then, you’re responsible for whatever they do.
I should mention that this last year was the first where we were engaged (and this next one will be the first now that we’re married).