The Challenger disaster. I wanted to be an astronaut when I was a kid, and I specifically wanted to go on The Challenger.
On a personal level, there’s a moment etched in my memory that sticks as a “before” and “after” - I woke up one morning when I was 20 years old, made some tea and toast, realized that I was in an unhealthy relationship and that it would NOT get better, finished my tea and toast, called my stepdad and asked if the cats and I could stay at their house until payday, then I started packing. The “moment in time” is when I sat on the couch looking around the livingroom knowing that a) it was over and b) I had a life to start.
My diagnosis of dysthymia. It’s almost like before that moment I had no self-awareness. I was just a little robot, operating on automatic. Intellectually I know I wasn’t that bad off, but it seems that way when I think back on that time.
– When I had to start wearing glasses
– When my “best friend” and I were fighting over who would pitch next and he broke out two of my front teeth.
– When my first wife died
– When my mother died
I would say when I started to quilt. Before that I would sit in front of the TV and just zone out. Now I sit in front of the TV with my quilting and at least produce something while I zone out.
More seriously, when my Mom died. Before that, I was waiting for my life to start. Now I know the best thing I had is gone and I don’t care if it starts. I will just survive.
On the positive side: the night I met my husband. I didn’t know in that moment how important he would be to me, but I knew there was something there. I could feel that it was significant right there, right then. I don’t know if it was “love at first sight” but I did know that everything changed.
When I decided to quit screwing around and start making money.
First sight of San Francisco - my 30th birthday present to myself.
When I finally realized I would never find the “right one” and just quit the game.