Such a cool thread, OP!
In 1977, when I was 18, I experienced a sequence of three events on the same day that I can honestly say were life-changing and life-defining. I can’t remember the date exactly but it was in May, after I had finished my first year of community college. I wanted to transfer to the University of British Columbia in Vancouver and I lived in a small northern BC town with few employment prospects. My folks didnt have a lot of money, we were 5 kids, and I was broke.
Late in 1976 and into 1977 I had my first romantic relationship with Robert. We were intense but doomed. He slept with a very good friend of mine and broke up with me to be with her. He quickly realized his mistake and begged me to take him back. I agreed, stupidly. After that, I was miserable, unhappy, the works. One morning in February 1977, something made me pick up the phone and call Robert to break up with him once and for all.
So, that day in May, unemployed and not in a relationship, I get a call from Robert. He wants me back. Something in my head said a very loud NO. I it was freaky, but it felt like I was given a life or death choice. If I went back to him, awful things would happen. It was that strong. I said no, with finality, and hung up. Only a few minutes later, I got a call from the pulp mill in our town. They were hiring university students, they said. Oh, and we will guarantee you a job for every summer in which you go back to university in the fall. Oh, and we will pay you $9.79 an hour (this was in 1977).
So I had a job. For at least the next 3 years until I finished my BA. I ended up saving all the money I needed for tuition, books, residence and incidentals. Just by comparing wages in those days, by 1980, I was making $13.45 an hour at the mill with union increases, etc. Where I am living now, in Manitoba, minimum wage is $11.50 an hour.
Yes, there were three things that happened that day in May. I got another phone call, this time from my high school crush, Dean. I was so in love with him, and I figured he never knew, but he called to ask me for a date. I was over the moon. We had two dates, but never really clicked. It was sweet and a little sad.
So these three events showed me that by listening to my very strong inclination to get the hell away from Robert, my university future would unfold as it was supposed to. And sweet high school crushes might call me once in a while. But if I had stayed with Robert, I would have ended my career, probably, after being sunk in a useless relationship.
Robert ended up marrying that very good friend of mine. I told a mutual friend, in 1982, that Robert and his wife would not last. I guess I was being petty and vengeful. But I heard through the years that Robert was the kind of man who liked to have many, many sexual partners. He told his wife about all of his encounters, so it wasnt cheating, apparently.
I didn’t care much, except I knew that I had dodged a very real bullet. It would have killed me to be with Robert. I could not live with someone who had to have so many partners. BTW, Robert’s marriage ended in 2008. I learned through mutual friends on FB. He HAD contacted me again, in 2005, asking to see me. He was going to travel to my city for a conference. I said no, politely. He hasn’t tried contacting me since.
I married hubby in 1986 and we are still together. I got my masters degree in the same program as my husband was taking, which was where we met. So I think I made the right choices in 1977 and the universe took care of the rest.