Moms: What would be a really great gift in the first week after giving birth?

[GythaOgg]

The best present we got when Oggkid was born 19 years ago was from my inlaws - they got us a very large Honey-Baked ham and various fixings to go with it including sandwich fixings. We ate off that ham for ages - it was convenient, you could make a quick sandwich or a meal, put it in a casserole, etc etc. It made our lives a lot easier, having that big ham in the frig for us or to make sandwiches for visitors.

It doesn’t have to be ham, but quick-to-fix food that doesn’t require a lot of work is a great gift for those early weeks.

[Phlosphr]

Getting some movies she recently missed at the theater is an awesome idea, one that is going to be very well received! Many thanks. I’m pretty sure that is the one thing she misses and actually brings up in conversation…how many movies we continue to miss in the theater. Nice.

We have a meal service that people from out of town can use to deliver organic meals - you can get orders by the week. It’s a local business with local food. I’m waiting for the troves of grand parents and in-laws to start sending them en masse!

[sup]bought a new freezer, just in case :)[/sup]

[Shirley_Ujest]

A tummy tuck and new vagina.

[Buttercup_Smith]

@Heart_of_Dorkness

Oh, but you can. At least a little. In my first week after giving birth, I literally didn’t sleep for more than two hours hour at a time. Our hungry little monkey was nursing about every half hour, on average, and pooping about every hour. And even when he was sleeping, I couldn’t just drift off. I’d wake up with every tiny noise he made - and let me tell you, he made a lot. It was like the soundtrack to Jurassic park. So the only time I really slept was when my husband was home and would take over for me. He couldn’t do feedings*, obviously, but he would bring the baby to me, and I’d nurse lying down. My husband would keep an eye on us in case one or both of us fell asleep.

So do that.

Also - and I really cannot tell you how much I appreciated this - my husband prepared all my meals for me for the first couple of weeks, and usually brought them to me. (This also helped me get in as much sleep as possible.) He always made sure it was something I could eat one-handed, while I held the baby in the other hand. Before he left for work in the morning, he’d leave my breakfast next to the bed. Lunch would be waiting in the fridge. Then, when he got home from work, he’d bring me my dinner in bed, and I’d catch a few winks before the night shift. He also refilled my water bottles, and made sure I had water and snacks within reach of the bed, the couch, and everywhere I’d sit and nurse. It was so nice, and so very necessary. I swear I would have starved if it hadn’t been for him.

On top of all that, he did the dishes and the laundry and cleaned the cat box and so on. Basically, he took care of me, so I could focus on taking care of the baby. And it was really, really, lovely.

Yes, yes, yes! But - also make it something she can use now. She might love doing spa days, but in the first week, she’s probably not going to want to spend that much time away from the baby, even if she can - I certainly couldn’t have. Having a masseuse come to your house, on the other hand? Fantastic.

So yes, just do/give something you know she’d like, and take good care of her.

Oh! And whenever you remember, tell her what a great job she’s doing with the baby. Be specific as possible. For example: our baby didn’t spit up at all, until one night when he suddenly went Exorcist on us. He was tired and hungry and crying, and we weren’t sure if we should feed him any more, so I just held him and tried to soothe him while my husband called the doctor, and he fell asleep. My husband told me I was such a good mom, and he was so impressed that I could calm the baby so easily. It meant the world to me.
ETA - Thumbs up on the iPad, too. I always tried to situate myself near the laptop when nursing, but it would have been great to be able to actually carry it around with us.

• And actually, he could have done feedings. It’s strongly recommended that if you’re trying to breast-feed, you don’t give bottles for the first six(?) weeks, because as bump says, the baby has to learn to do it. But, I was sleeping so little (and nursing so much) that the lactation consultant we’d be fine doing a bottle or two a night. Ultimately, I just stuck it out until six weeks, but you guys don’t necessarily have to.

You sound like one very lucky woman with a husband that is so thoughtful and loves you.

[LurkerInNJ]

A cleaning lady for a full day to clean the whole house.

[Rushgeekgirl]

One of Qin Shi Huangdi’s servants.

[moejoe]

@Phlosphr

Getting some movies she recently missed at the theater is an awesome idea, one that is going to be very well received! Many thanks. I’m pretty sure that is the one thing she misses and actually brings up in conversation…how many movies we continue to miss in the theater. Nice.

We have a meal service that people from out of town can use to deliver organic meals - you can get orders by the week. It’s a local business with local food. I’m waiting for the troves of grand parents and in-laws to start sending them en masse!

[sup]bought a new freezer, just in case :)[/sup]

The movies are a really great idea, she will love that you were so thoughtful.

Also though, when she’s been in the same pajamas for a week and is covered in baby goo, she won’t mind being reminded that you think she’s beautiful-this is where jewelry comes in

Maybe pick something that’s wear all the time-ish (including bath or shower) so she doesn’t have to be careful with it. Whenever she glances over at it she will feel loved…can’t beat that!

[Girl_From_Mars]

Cute pyjamas - she’s probably going to spend a fair amount of time in them in the early weeks and it was nice to feel like I could walk to the front gate to collect the mail without embarrassment.

iPad - I was devoted to my iPhone the first time around, this time I want an iPad for those 40+ minute nursing sessions. I had a good app called Total Baby which helped me time feeds, remind me what side I had last used, kept track of nappies in the first few weeks while I was getting my head around things.

Audiobooks - particularly when I was tired I didn’t have the energy to read but needed something to keep me entertained during the abovementioned sessions. Could be preloaded onto the iPad.

A birthstone - I’ve got an unset birthstone for my daughter’s birth month which I will eventually get set (and may give to her when she’s older). Sentimental without being totally materialistic.

A tray to eat in bed/on the sofa - somewhere safe to pop dinner or a cup of tea while holding a small bubba.

Many many cups of tea - I really appreciated him getting up with me at night and making me a cup of tea before he headed back to bed - really little thing but it was comforting and expressed solidarity.

Little box of essentials to have close to hand with nipple shields, lanisoh, nail clippers, wind drops, lip balm, hand cream, tissues etc, again really handy to have all in one place.

Housecleaner as has been mentioned - someone to just keep things tidy and perhaps keep the washing up to date.

Lots of photos of her with the baby. Seems to be par for the course that the Mums do the photography, most of my friends and I have complained about all of the wonderful shots of the baby with Dad and other relatives, but very few of us with the baby. Bear in mind she will probably want to heavily edit, but hey, that’s the beauty of digital!

Hot tub suggestion - just research this a little - while normal baths are meant to be fine, I’ve read that hot tubs which don’t have fresh water each time should be avoided for the first 6 weeks as they can cause infection. Plus as you keep bleeding for a few weeks (hope someone has warned her about that!) she can also contaminate the water. Check with your Dr, Ob, midwife or other medical practitioner.

[StaudtCJ]

A great gift would be to set up a “nursing station” wherever she’s going to be nursing. there should be cans of juice/bottles of water, snacks, reading material, blankets, diapers, boppy, breast pads, baby onesies, and whatever else she is likely to need or want to use during feedings. She’s going to spend a lot of time in that spot, wherever it is. Then it should magically never need restocking. This is what a friend of mine did for me, and it was the sweetest thing. I really appreciated it.

Also, reassure her that you are not feeling left out, which is something many new mothers worry about since Daddy isn’t feeding baby. Remember that the ONLY thing you can’t do is breastfeed. If the baby needs a change, do it, don’t ask to do it. Be proactive. At some point if she ever says thank you for doing something regarding the baby, remind her gently that good daddies don’t babysit, they parent. That means the not-so-fun stuff is part of the deal, though you appreciate her appreciation.

At a moment when she’s feeling like a walking milk jug, give her a great big hug and tell her she’s beautiful. Get her a T-shirt that says something she’d appreciate. Maybe get a plain one and airbrush it with something she’d find funny, like two milk jugs or something, or one like mine that said “I can squirt milk 20 feet, what can you do?”, depending on her personality and sense of humor.

Another option is getting her two or three very nice/pretty/feminine lounge outfits with large necklines or nursing-friendly openings. She’s going to need comfortable loungewear, and finding comfortable pretty stuff is difficult. That you’d think of her needs for something comfy and yet feminine to wear, that also accommodates nursing requirements, would mean a lot. Remember that anything you get her that you want her to wear/use needs to be easily 6
3washable with no ironing, etc., because she will end up with milk, spitup, and varying other random things on it.

These are all various things that various mommies have told me that they really liked or that I liked myself.

[Serenata67]

When my best friend gave birth, my husband and I made her a very large, nice dinner. (He’s a chef.) She got a quality, healthy dinner and we made tons so there would be easy left overs for her to reheat at her convenience. She loved it… she didn’t have time to cook “real food” and was living off of frozen food and hamburger helper for a few days.

So make dinner. Or have a friend who is a good cook come in and make a great dinner.

[irishgirl]

I have a pair of earrings that my husband gave me the day irishbaby was born- they mean a lot to me, and I wear them all the time.

Audiobooks would have been something I would have loved- hard to read while feeding/holding a baby, and sometimes you just don’t feel like TV/movies.

Simply remembering that just because she is the mum it doesn’t make her any better or more skilled or less scared than you. Do all the little things you can with the baby- dress it, change it, play with it, soothe it, take it out for walks, bath it. You’re no less capable than she is, and every little thing you do means one less thing she has to, which equals more time to sleep- which is really all she’ll want.

[Phlosphr]

@irishgirl

I have a pair of earrings that my husband gave me the day irishbaby was born- they mean a lot to me, and I wear them all the time.

Audiobooks would have been something I would have loved- hard to read while feeding/holding a baby, and sometimes you just don’t feel like TV/movies.

Simply remembering that just because she is the mum it doesn’t make her any better or more skilled or less scared than you. Do all the little things you can with the baby- dress it, change it, play with it, soothe it, take it out for walks, bath it. You’re no less capable than she is, and every little thing you do means one less thing she has to, which equals more time to sleep- which is really all she’ll want.

Facebook has made me wish we had a “Like” button more than once on these boards…your post is a perfect example of why.