“The Government of Canada takes this very, very seriously,” said the Minister. “Being hairless down there should be a matter of personal choice for Canadian men and women and not one taken away by a cucumber.”
http://www.thelapine.ca/monsanto-cucumbers-cause-genital-baldness-immediately-banned-nova-scotia
If the story isn’t a joke.
Then, it does sound like there’s some toxicity issues with those cucumbers. Anything toxic enough to cause skin rash and hair loss could be doing worse things inside the body.
British person here to assist Americans. The story is a blatant satire. The reason it isn’t funny is because it’s Canadian satire.
Have you looked at the other stories on the site, as well as their tagline “Rabbits eat Onions”? Methinks 'tis satire.
I was thinking this sounded like someone picked up a story from The Onion and mistakenly took it seriously.
For some reason, my brain keeps reading this sentence:
“leading to the immediate and total ban of sales of all that company’s crop and subsequent dill pickles.”
As “dick pickles”
I think I’m suffering dicklexia or something.
You mean “dickles”
I’m fairly certain they haven’t gotten satire in Canada yet.
Well, this headline from the site MUST be true:
It is. Take a look at a companion article, Ann Coulter Winning MOVEMBER Moustache Challenge With Rush Limbaugh
or: Romney in a landslide!
Canadian humor is a little more subtle than you may be used to.
Besides, cucumbers have other uses for the genital area. Topical applications, not digested.
Jerry: How was the date?
George: She was bald.
Jerry: Bald?
George: Bald.
Jerry: Bald?!
George: Bald! Bald Jerry Bald!
All I’m hearing is a great way to save yourself the time and money you’d spend waxing.
You aren’t supposed to rub it on your genitals.
Yeah, Monsanto would marked the crap out of this if it were real
Well, this finally makes sense of a lot of the porn I have seen.
You now understand why those women were yelling “Fuck me harder, eh!”
You know what else isn’t funny? Your mother.
That was a lot of cucumbers!
Obligatory picture. (SFW)
