While we’re here, a few for the audiences:
Rock concert audiences: This is not mass karaoke. I did not pay huge sums of money to hear some drunk yahoo sing in my ear. STFU.
Classical concert audiences: The Hallelujah Chorus is not a national anthem. Just because two hundred years ago George II got a leg cramp after sitting through two hours of oratorio is no reason for you to stand up now. Don’t be such a lemming.
Frank Zappa’s entire collection. Sure, the late eighties and early nineties weren’t his best work by any means, but he was churning out two (or more) solid albums per year up until around 84. Oh crap, I guess you’re right about that 20 years thing. 
I figured the beatles and the ramones, but they were in a class unto themselves. Acts like britney, Good Charlotte, Limp Bizkit, etc. seem to be churning out crap by the pantload every few minutes. It needs to be stopped, for the good of all mankind.
Lastly, U2 gets a pass on nothing. :mad: All that you can’t leave behind was barely up to snuff, and vertigo sounds like some rehashed Van Halen B side. :mad: It’s time we crack down on them before they suck again.
Speaking of Van Halen, how about a three strikes and out rule. Your third lead singer is your last. If you can’t stick with him, call it quits. Maybe it’ll make 'em think a bit before picking some washed up singer from a crap one hit band. And yeah, we count velvet revolver and audioslave in this too. Nice try guys, but replacing one member of the band does not a new band make. Strike 2 for both of ya.
Wow…I seem to have struck a nerve with some people, huh? You know what kills me about Velvet Revolver? Guns N Roses got tired of dealing with Axl Rose, citing that he was difficult to work with, and a junkie. And they replaced him with Scott Weiland, who’s been in and out of rehab more often than some people change their underwear.
Hey, Gyrate? I feel ya on the mass karaoke. With the exception of Billy Joel. Listening to the audience sing the chorus of Piano Man to him was nothign short of amazing.
Attractive females (such as Britney Spears, Jessica Simpson, and the Spice Girls entire) who cannot sing, play an instrument or write their own material shall henceforth have any record contracts terminated and given video contracts with Vivid Video.
I’m feeling generous, I could have said Max Hardcore.
Amen to that.
I’m also sick of the low-whine Stone Temple Pilots-esque growly voices (Creed and Nickelback come to mind.)
Dave Matthews is popular now, but only because nobody has figured out that he’s actually Yanni with a shave, haircut and a severe head injury. Don’t be fooled people! You’re paying upwards of $75 a ticket to listen to the hold music of tomorrow.
Music is art, some would say it’s even the highest art. Thinking of it this way, if you don’t hang Thomas Kinkade paintings in your house or collect Precious Moments figurines then don’t buy Jessica Simpson or Britney Spears albums. It really is that simple.
If you’re in a band and the most lucrative offers you’re getting these days are from the Greater Tri Cities Chamber Of Commerce asking you to play at their cretin summer carnival, hang it up. I’m looking at you Marshall Tucker Band. You too Hootie and the Blowfish.
No more of that drum rhythm that I describe as a “slow boogaloo”:
1 e and a 2 e and a 3 e and a 4 e and a :||
aka The Smells-Like-Teen-Spirit beat. Since then, it (and its variations) has materialized in a multitude of popular songs. I don’t care if this rhythm is popular. I want it to stop. Now.
I’d really appreciate it if, when doing cover songs, bands didn’t fuck around too much with the word to the song, unless somehow it’s really, really, cool (no examples of this come to mind).
That said, no more changing genders in cover songs. No one’s gonna think you’re gay. The White Stripes doing Dolly Parton’s “Jolene,” or Cyndi Lauper singing Prince’s “When You Were Mine”: good! Aforementioned “Fell In Love With A BOY”: baaaad for that and that alone. I won’t even listen to it based on that. Bah!
ZJ
Fell in Love With a Boy by Joss Stone is better than the original by the White Stripes. The white stripes piss me off. I’d like to piss ON them.
It’s not worth losing my job over. Plus I work in the factory, engine run is done after roll out. Maybe I’ll see if the radio will work on 3 phase 220. But someone will have to find it first, it left in a box of rejected airplane parts this past week. I also discovered home burned Shania Twain CD’s don’t work so well after spending a couple of weeks in a freezer.
For the love od God, we need to stop the ‘big finish’ endings. I hate them at concerts, but they should NEVER be used on a studio album. Just end the damn song please.
As such, the live version of Skynrd’s Free Bird must never, ever be played again.
Only if you don’t count David Bowie, the Thin White Workaholic himself:
1969 Space Oddity
1971 The Man Who Sold The World
1971 Hunky Dory
1972 The Rise And Fall Of Ziggy Stardust
1973 Aladdin Sane
1973 Pin-Ups
1974 Diamond Dogs
1974 David Live
1975 Young Americans
1976 Station To Station
1977 Low
1977 Heroes
1978 Stage
1979 Lodger
1980 Scary Monsters {And Super Creeps}
No-one’s ever beaten that run, and no-one ever will. God knows where he found the time to tour, produce, shag, and snort heroic amounts of cocaine.
In fact a moratorium on Free Bird, lasting at least five or ten years, would be really great.
Snoop Dogg goes back to old school style rap (muthafucka I got five on that twenty sack!) or is shot along with all the others.
I’m with everyone else that thinks random noun + number does not equal cool band name. Obviously modern musicians aren’t big fans of the SDMB or they would know of some of our famous band name threads.
I’d say Zappa beat it based on my personal taste. I dig Bowie, and those were good albums – certainly more popular than anything Frank ever released – but judging by quantity of quality:
1966 Freak Out
1967 Absolutely Free
1968 We’re Only In It For The Money
1969 Uncle Meat
1969 Hot Rats
1970 Weasels Ripped My Flesh
1970 Chunga’s Revenge
1971 Fillmore East, June 1971
1972 Just Another Band From LA
1972 The Grand Wazoo
1973 Overnite Sensation
1974 Apostrophe (’)
1974 Roxy & Elsewhere
1975 One Size Fits All
1976 Zoot Allures
During this eleven year span, he not only released these fifteen exceptional (IMO) works, but he also released seven others that were pretty good in their own right. That’s two albums per year for over a decade, keeping the quality consistently high.
He released nothing in '77, then six whole works in the next two years, ('78 & '79), at least three of which were spectacular.
Nothing came out in '80, but then during the eight year span between '81 and '88, he released seventeen albums, not including any of the live anthologies. Of those seventeen, I consider nine exceptional.
Frank was one prolific dude, but he never really got into the drug scene, and apparently didn’t really spend time with his family. In the recent VH1 “Daughters of Rock” special, Moon Unit commented on the Valley Girl phenomenon. She was uncomfortable with her short-lived fame, especially doing live performances at such an awkward age, but was willing to put up with almost anything just for a chance at getting some attention from her father. A rather sad story, I think.
Who Od? Og no like Od! OG SMASH!!!
Well, you could be Roland Orzabal, and end your songs by starting something cool (such as a series of guitar riffs, some interesting bass, or a weirdy keyboard countermelody) and then fading out while that’s happening (see: Everybody Wants to Rule the World, other songs too numerous to mention). Or you could be Thom Yorke and just kinda stop playing when you can’t think of anything more compelling to do (see: Paranoid Android). Which of these would you prefer?
Elton John:
1969 Empty Sky
1970 Elton John
1971 Tumbleweed Connection
1971 Friends
1971 11-17-70
1971 Madman Across The Water
1972 Honky Chateau
1973 Don’t Shoot Me I’m Only The Piano Player
1973 Goodbye Yellow Brick Road
1974 Caribou
1975 Captain Fantastic and the Brown Dirt Cowboy
11 great albums in 6 years.
Eh, I don’t care what anyone thinks. The Beatles, Elvis, the Kinks, and other wearers of the high-slung guitar definitely beat the low-slingers aesthetically, even when we’re just talking visuals.
Let’s see–ditto on no more Free Bird and I up you a Stairway. I do not need to EVER hear those songs AGAIN. As someone pointed out earlier, Zep has a lot of great songs that are never heard on the radio.
Singing about Vietnam (or any other war). I don’t care how profound your insights are, how compassionate you are feeling towards the veterans, and how you are calling attention to their situation; if you weren’t there, don’t sing about it.
Also, I am sick of bands from other countries musically kvetching about the US. If you don’t like the US, don’t tour here, don’t sell albums here and don’t move here to escape your own country’s higher taxes. Same goes for US bands musically kvetching about other countries. I am sure there are some examples, but offhand, I can’t think of any.
Again, excellent topic!