I just found out about Cairns spiders. They’re the size of a human fist, and they’ve been known to eat birds.
I know almost everything in Australia is deadly poisonous, but this takes the cake. Australia is now off my to-visit list. I’ll stick with the black bears and kamikaze deer of upstate NY, thanks.
I killed a giant fucking centipede when I was living in Japan. About to head out and there it was on the door: I don’t remember exactly how big it was, but looking at a ruler it had to have been at least 5" long, probably longer, and about as thick as one of my fingers. Fortunately, we had a basket full of different kinds of bug sprays on top of the kutsubako (shoe cabinet), so I grabbed one and went after it. Spraying the shit out of that fucker it still took him forever to die… or at least stop moving. At one point he even writhed behind the kutsubako, but fortunately the can had a spray wand that I could stick behind the cabinet and use to flush him out. Euuuuuuuuughghgh. When he was apparently dead on the floor I pulled a piece of cardboard box out of my trash and shove him out the front door and into the bushed. Well, okay, I sprayed him for a few more seconds until he was in a little puddle of deadly toxins and then shoved him out the door.
My apartment now has occasional centipedes–or are they millipedes? The fast ones with all the really wispy, thin, long legs. Those motherfuckers come out of nowhere–fortunately pretty rarely. I once found one on the wall above my bed just as I was about to try to go to sleep… Yeah, no, welcome to another two hours of staring around with all the lights on.
Bwahahaha. That’s beautiful.
I don’t think I like you very much.
I swear, Zsofia, when you’re sitting in a chair, I’m going to put one of those on your shoulder.
Acch! I jerked the chair when I saw that thing on my screen.
I’m outta here–this thread has burrowed too deeply into my sub-conscious to allow for a good night’s sleep. Yeah, the seven foot version that wants to stick its forcipules into my abdomen as it writhes and wraps around me and I am unable to scream…
I wish I’d never heard the name pericynthion*
*Greek for “master of nightmarish threads”.