See how dizzy I got? I smooshed up “Hammy” and “honey”, and got “Hanny”. Weird, huh? But it is shorter than “Hammy honey”. Maybe I’ll keep it.
Hey, I TRIED to hijack it, Rue, with at least a different family tradition – okay, maybe it wasn’t a hijack so much as a slight veer onto the shoulder of the road – but Kalessa was the only one who followed me! So don’t blame me, at least I was TRYING! (And she’s very trying, too, isn’t she folks? Har har)
Yep, the mini-pitchfork things. They’re spelled “sai”. Okay.
How many people here watched the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, and what important life lessons did you learn? I learned that turtles aren’t too bright, and probably shouldn’t be given weapons. Come on! Wearing a trenchcoat and a hat, but no pants? That’s just silly.
I need coffee.
“Front seat shotgun, going and coming!”
Does this mean anything to anyone else?
There are only three of us now.
The dining room table seats 6 but has room for 8 or 10 if you add the leaves and haul in chairs from the kithen. The breakfast table has four chairs and an L bench that you can squeeze 5 kids on if they are all under the age of 8. (If you’re counting that’s 15 so far) There are two breakfast bar chair, that are great for a couple of teenage boys or two mooney teenagers of opposite gender . (Which we hope doesn’t happen if its an all family event. That kind of thing goes on in Arkansas or Tennessee, not here at the Accents in Houston.) We’re up to 17 now. Lemme think…
Oh right, pull the ottoman into the breakfast table for two little ones and move those chairs to the dining room. 19
If we borrow chairs from church we can set 12 to 15 around the ping pong table. It’s not a flimsy green thing, its an oak sturdy thing that you can stand on. (Um I should explain we don’t stand on it if we are using it for a table, that mostly happens to change lightbulbs or something.)
Then there is the pool table. We have a ping pong table top we can put on and with the aforementioned borrowed folding chairs from church, there’s 10 more. This one requires folks with finesse to sit at as it slides about if nudged while dining. We try to avoid using this one and set it up as if it’s the “buffet” line.
So by my best guess, the three of us could host 19, 30 or so if we borrow chairs from church or have BYOC.
If you’re wanting to watch TV though. There’s only three comfy TV chairs. If you’re desperate to eat and watch the game you can see the TV center from the breakfast table if get the “good side”. The “bad side” means you have to watch the faces of the people on the “good side” as they celebrate the touchdowns and argue the calls. I usually take my plate and go to the computer in the other room.
Oh and happy Monday on Tuesday.
My immediate circle of friends have always invoked it as “Shuffle your feet, lose your seat.” We also call this the New Jersey Rule, but I have no idea why.
Now that all the kids are grown, the family tradition around here is “Arguing Dogmatic Political Positions.” Since the family is rather evenly divided between radical Democrats and reactionary Republicans, this makes for rather exciting table talk. Next year, I’m bringing artillery!
I have absolutely no luck in starting hijacks. I’ve tried on other MMP, and nobody ever follows me. However, because I have posted two different family traditions and don’t feel like revealing any more, I’ll try again.
I think, and I may be mistaken, this is an old memory, that turtles were cool even before they were ninjas. Wasn’t it Mr. (or Professor) Turtle that sent the kid off on adventures? And it always ended with the kid screaming for help and Mr. Turtle saying " bubble, bubble, something, something, time for this one to come home." Not the professor and his boy, Sherman, this was another cartoon altogether.
And then there was Yertle the Turtle. He wasn’t cool so much as foolish, but he learned his lessen in the end.
Now we have Crush, and who could be cooler than a surfer dude sea turtle? Mutant Teenage Ninja Turtles pale in comparison.
Of course, Super Chicken was also cool, but he’s not a turtle.
My husband always stops the car when he sees turtles in the road - he’ll pick them up and carry them to the side so they don’t get run over. One time, when our daughter was small, he brought home this big, honkin’ turtle for her to see. Then he just turned it loose in our yard.
Poor turtle - somewhere, his turtle family was waiting for him to come home from a hard day of, um, turtlin’ but he never got back. Or maybe he didn’t get back for months and months, and by that time, his wife had run off with the milkman and all the kids got tattoos and piercings, and the house was foreclosed and the yard got all overgrown and weedy - just because some guy wanted his kid to see a turtle.
Sometimes, life sucks.
Our family tradition is, when the whole gang is around everyone has to raise their voice 30 decibels, second, in the mornings at like 6 am classical music is played at loud volumes, and third, my grandpa has a collection of sayings he constantly uses at these times.
They have a lot of large family parties where its more like 3 or 4 kids tables, but everyone just kinda finds a group to sit with, and it ends up being mostly the same every year.
I know nothing from turtles. I’m pretty clear on the distinction between turtles and tortoises, but I have no idea where the terrapins fit in. Is that just a snooty herpetologist word for turtle?
Anyway, concerning naming rules for states:
When I was in college we spent way too much time playing foosball. We quite frequently played a variant called “Texas Rules,” wherein if the ball went off the table and you caught it before it hit the floor you could throw it at your opponent’s goal.
Since it was college, there was usually a lot of beer involved in the game (“beer foos” being another set of rules), and succesful Texas attempts became fewer and fewer as the evenings wore on. The next development was “Oklahoma” rules, where you were allowed to throw the ball if you caught it on one bounce. Naturally, the rules kept moving north. If I recall correctly, “Montana Rules” meant you could throw it if you got to it before it stopped rolling.
The whole thing eventually ended up in Saskatchewan. Up there, the first drunk to find the ball on the floor someplace gets to throw it.
Turtles are the lumps of nuts and caramel covered in chocolate. They are way-yummy. They also make something like that with cashews, those might be terrapins. Maybe you should look it up somewhere Ex. I know you could do a search in GQ and find out. Just a tip from me to you.
And I think it was Mr. Lizard the Wizard (or Mr. Wizard the Lizard, but Mr. Wizard had his own show so it was probably Mr. Lizard) that sent Tooter the Turtle out into the big World on adventures.
Help Mr. Lizard!
Drizzle, drazzle, druzzle, drome.
Time for this one to come home!
-Rue. (tippy)
The real rule which is:
When one leaves one’s seat one must, using the same motion with which one stood up, touch something black and say “black black places back” thus calling upon divine power to magically preserve rights to the seat while one gets some ice cream or another bowl of cereal.
Now, some of the kids I work with say “jack jack places back” but I think it’s just cause they don’t really know how the world works. WHERE ARE THE PARENTS?!?!?
I think “move your meat” was invented by parents who were sick of kids fighting over the “black black” rule. It’s easier to moderate, but I think it’s just lazy parenting.
Tattooed and pierced turtles? I could see the tattoos but what would they pierce? Turtles ain’t got all that much.
As Rue said turtles are lumps of nuts (pecans AIR) and caramel covered in chocolate. Mayfield’s [sup]TM[/sup] makes Turtle Tracks Ice Cream [sup]TM[/sup] which is yummy vanilla, caramel, pecan, chocolate ice cream with little lumps of nuts, caramel and chocolate. [sub]drool[/sub]
Speaking of tattooes and piercings, I was riding down the main drag in Albeeny, Jawja today and at the tattoo/piercing place they are running a special. You can get one tattoo or one piercing at full price and another at half price. From the looks of it, it’s one tattoo and one half price or one piercing and one half price. I don’t think one can mix and match on this one. I have no desire for any kind of piercing, thank you but no, however, I keep thinking can I pass up such a bargain for a tattoo. Course I’ve been told tattoes hurt to get and I don’t like pain so maybe not.
I need to go buy ice cream.
-swampbear (non-tattooed, non-pierced)
Rue, you are a God, a God I tell you! Do you know how many times I have mentioned this (specifically “time for this one to come home” with the proper cadence and all) and been met only with blank stares? And now I even have the first part of the rhyme, yippee! I bow before your font of knowledge–wait, that could be phrased better . . . I bow before you, oh font of knowledge. That’s better.
Let’s see if anyone knows this one:
Are you a turtle?
I think there’ve been “are you a turtle” threads here and there. If I remember correctly (yeah, that could happen with non-cartoon trivia, sure) Johnny LA pops in with the secret handshake.
I was thinking about getting a tattoo. I won’t though. Tattoos are just for young punk kids. Not people of my mature sensibilities. But while I was at the Arts and Crafts store today (Michael’s if that means anything to you) I saw a cool stamp. Not for postage, for daubing in ink and then festivating up something. It was a gecko and it was sorta primitive in a petroglyph way. If I were to get a tattoo it would be a primitve petroglyphy gecko. But now I’ve seen the stamp, I could just buy it and stamp on my tattoo every morning. I could skip the mornings I don’t shower I guess, but since I shower pretty much every morning (you are welcome) there wouldn’t be much skipping.
Unless I decide to take up hopscotch. Then there’d be a lot of skipping. Even if I take my shower in the morning.
And do you remember this:
Duuuuuuuhhh, gee Tennessee, Mr. Whoppee said…
Screw Mr. Whooppee, Chumley! He’s just an old crank hopped up on cough syrup! I say we’re going to the moon and to the moon we’ll go!
That was my favorite episode. That penguin got so excited over things.
-Rue. (go go gophers, watch 'em go go go!)
Sorry Kallessa, I don’t get the reference. I’m ill-educated, that’s what.
But I once made a list (with several friends) of all the cartoon shows we could remember. It ended at something like three hundred. It was scary. Does anyone remember Dr. Sunggles? People stare at me like I’m demented whenever I sing the theme song: "Dr. Sunggles, friend of the animal woooorld!.
Shut up.
Yet another sign that I’m evil. My niece and nephew were over the last time my sister was home. This is not the sister who has the niece and nephew. She’s another one. In case you haven’t figured it out by now, I have a lot of sisters.
So anyway, my niece has these temporary tattoos so obviously she wants to put them on all of us. I helpfully suggested she might want to put one on her forehead because that’s the kind of aunt I am. She’s seven so naturally she ignored that, but when my sister and her friend came wandering into the room, they were offered tattoos. Of course they accepted. Guess where they ended up?
-Lil
Rue, my kid wants to get gecko seat covers for her car. Apparently, there’s an entire line of gecko-adorned products available - last night she was showing me a gecko-adorned steering wheel cover and a gecko-adorned seatbelt pad and a gecko-adorned license plate frame. I don’t think she’s considered a gecko tattoo, which is a good thing.
I don’t think geckos should be tattooed. They’re colorful enough as they are.
But a gecko tattoo on a forehead would be especially disturbing. At least it’d disturb me, and we don’t want to do that, do we?
Dear Lord, no, you’re disturbed enough! 