Mr. Coworker, could you please stop CLIPPING YOUR FUCKING TOENAILS in front of me?

The BBQ Pit
1

Let’s just ignore for a moment that you think it’s acceptable to take off your shoes and socks, put your feet up against the edge of your desk, and hunch over, clipping your disgusting, nasty, smelly toenails AT THE OFFICE.

Let’s also ignore for a moment that the discarded nails are just flying through the air, free to sit wherever they land until the END OF TIME. (Or until the monthly vacuuming happens - I bet they love that).

But what I’m having trouble wrapping my mind around is why, why in the holy ever-loving fucking hell, do you think it’s OK to do this during OUR FUCKING MEETING?

Wasn’t it clear to you when I stopped speaking, mid-sentence, and stared at you, mouth agape, when you placed your foot TWO FEET FROM MY FACE?

Wasn’t it clear to you when I stood up and backed against the door, as far away from you as possible, to avoid getting hit by low-flying shrapnel?

Did it even register when my coworkers on speaker phone asked you what that clicking noise was, and you replied that you were cutting your toenails, and they didn’t speak for about 30 seconds?

Listen, you sick fuck. I realize this is a casual office, but that doesn’t mean we’re dorm roomies. Put your goddamn stinky feet down, put your goddamn socks and shoes back on, put your goddamn grooming utensils away, and act like a FUCKING POLITE MEMBER OF SOCIETY.

No really, I enjoy spending five minutes dowsing myself in the sink like it was a birdbath shouting “Unclean! Unclean!” every time I leave your office. :mad:

2

Is the office so casual that you can’t say something?

3

I have. Many times. He shrugs and does it anyway. Seems silly to get him in trouble over it, hence a Pit rant.

4

It’s not silly, it’s disgusting. Bring it up with his boss. It is un-hygenic and certainly unprofessional to groom oneself at the office.

5

Woah, I have done some pretty inappropriate things at the office but it would simply never occur to me to whip off the old shoes and go for it like that. What a sick jerk. Definitely tell somebody.

6

That is just disgusting! To hell with not getting him in trouble…I’d be screaming from the rooftops if any sick-fuck co-worker of mine did that shit at work. Does he not have a bathroom at home?

God, that is just the shittiest of manners. Start flicking boogers at the ratfucker when he whips out his trusty toe-knife clippers. Better yet, just go fart on him every time he starts it. Hey…what’s good for the goose…

7

I cannot believe someone would do that. What a pig.

8

I can beat that.

One of my less couth friends- the one that never factors tax and tip into his share of meals at restraunts- the one that goes out, orders extravagently, and then says “Oh, someone will have to cover for me, I only brought four dollars”- the one that stays for hours longer than he is invited- the one that just walks in to my house, walks in to my kitchen, picks up a bag of chips (or grabs a soda from the fridge) without asking in any way.

Yeah, that one. Well once we were at a friends, and I looked over to see what that annoying sound was.

He was sitting there, at somebody elses house(!) clipping his toenails with their nail clipper (!!!).

9

God, just report him to your boss! That’s absolutely disgusting!

YUCK!!!

10

I think I’ll wait until he does it again, ask him to stop, and if he doesn’t - then I’ll say I’m going to speak to our boss (or HR).

I just don’t like messing with another man’s livelihood if I can help it.

11

I my case, I think he’d stop after I threw up all over him.

That is seriously disgusting. I’d tell him once that I found it seriously disgusting, and if he ever did it again, I’d report him in writing to his supervisor.

Some people amaze me. Any personal grooming more advanced that touching up your lip gloss or running a comb through your hair should be done in the bathroom. Anything that involves removing an article of clothing should be done in your own bathroom, in your home. Yuck.

12

Wow, you are a more patient man than I.

13

Well, either the asshole doesen’t have a HOME to do that in, or he is intentionaly doing it for the reaction. I cannot fathom anyone clipping their toenails at work. He is being an intentional ass to see what he can get away with. Report this or it will get WORSE.

14

He’s doing it for a reaction? What, total disgust? EW!! Does this guy have no hope of sex, anywhere, so he’s hostile? Holy shit, EW again.

I used to have a female coworker who’d groom herself like a lonely baboon. In class. In the office. Before, during and after lunch. She pick her skin, her scalp, and her arms. Then she’d chew on…whatever.

She still does this, actually, I just flee when she approaches.

15

I thought I’d seen it all when I witnessed a woman cutting her toenails on the ALRT, completely oblivious to the various looks of disbelief, outrage, shock, and disgust that she was getting from every other passenger in the car.

At least she wasn’t allowing her public grooming to distract her from something for which she was receiving financial compensation.

Wow.

That’s a very sympathetic attitude, but some things should not be tolerated. Do you think it’s likely he’d be fired, or that there might be repercussions beyond a supervisor-type pulling him aside and explaining what really ought to require no explanation? Even if, as a worst case scenario, he’s told “Do that again and we’d rather you looked elsewhere for employment,” is that really so bad? Where do you draw the line? Pooping in a desktop bucket?

16

Think “negative attention is better than no attention”, and you have the thought process here.

17

Maybe it’s a dominance thing like when LBJ would make people come in and do their job while he went to the bathroom.

18

Or maybe he’s just oblivious or doesn’t think it’s wrong or a bad idea.

I could never do something like that in front of others! EWWWW!!

19

Even if you were dorm roomies, it would still be disgusting for him to put his foot two feet from your face and just let his nails fly all over instead of actually throwing them away like a non-revolting person would do. I don’t remember my roommate and I ever clipping our nails in front of each other, and when we did, we did it on our own side of the room and clipped them into the trash. ICK!!! I can’t believe someone would do something so gross in an office, when it’s too gross to even do in a dorm!!

20

Meh, at least he doesn’t BITE his toenails like I do…

in the sanctity of home, though, of course. In public is just rude.