Very occasionally I’ll feel irrationally embarrassed about walking, biking or taking the bus someplace because I don’t own a car.
Most of the time, mind you, I just feel complacent and smug about it, but sometimes when I encounter people who seem to think that my taking a bus is tantamount to revealing myself as a homeless bag lady scrounging for food in public trash cans, I experience a bit of secondhand irrational embarrassment.
(Note to non-US Dopers: This is totally an American car-culture thing and it is entirely normal for you to find it ludicrously incomprehensible.)
One time our workplace did this trivia thing about employees where everyone submits an interesting trivia fact about themselves. I am a big fan of airplanes, so I wrote that “I can name 70 different models of airplanes.” (i.e., Boeing 777, Airbus A380, etc.)
Guess how it was announced at our small group trivia fun event? “**Velocity **can name 70 different models.”
Way to be skeevy Velocity!
Sometimes, when driving, I pass a pedestrian schlepping their groceries. Often it’s an elderly or handicapped person. I feel embarrassed to be driving, while this person isn’t… but not to the point of offering them a ride. Them I’m embarrassed by not offering them a ride. One of these days I’m gonna pull over and offer.
On the other hand, most folks on the autism spectrum (one of which is my daughter), love the way Subway logically goes through crafting a sandwich. It creates a rationale space in the universe. 4", 6" or 12", what kind of bread, should that bread be toasted or plain, do you want cheese, what kind of cheese, etc.
I once spent half a day in office wearing my t-shirt inside out. Didn’t realize it until the lady at the cash counter asked me if “this is the fashion these days.” Since then, I have always been a little self-conscious / embarrassed whenever I wear tees, especially if it does not have a chest pocket that I can touch to assure myself I have it on right. Aaand, I have to check often to be sure the fly is closed, but that’s a regular man thing, right?
mandala, I have a sweater I keep at the office because they keep the building so cold. Often I’ll just haphazardly throw it on without checking to see if it’s inside-out. It’s not a big enough deal to me that the tag is showing. All I care about is that I’m no longer cold.
But inevitably, coworkers will catch me with my sweater inside-out and make a big to-do out of it. Like, one coworker has this tendency of notifying me that I’ve got it on inside-out in the same kind of whispery voice a person might use to let a woman know she’s got blood on the seat of her pants. And when this coworker does this, without fail I feel irrationally embarrassed. "Just tell me in a normal voice, lady!"I always want to scream.
I try not to be seen in public spaces in my work shirt and non slip shoes. Nothing goofy or wrong with them but I just don’t want to be seen after work hanging around in my work clothes.
I once a had a large knit striped pullover mock T sweater with a patch pocket on the breast. I unknowingly put it on backwards one time and went out. I saw a girl with the same sweater but different color which was kinda awesome as I had bought mine online. But I laughed because she was wearing it backwards and my friend pointed out that my sweater was on backwards too and thought that it was made that way and was a trend to have pockets on your shoulder blade. Idk it’s just that the sweater went on easy either way
On the day before a groomer appointment for my little Yorkie I give her a bath and blow her hair dry. I dont want the groomer to think my little dog is not properly cared for. It has never failed if one of my dogs gets sick or hurt they are nasty or smelly for the Vet visit. Every dang time.
This is one of the reasons I make a point of cheerfully smiling, humming, etc., as I go along doing pedestriany stuff like lugging groceries or waiting at a bus stop. I appreciate the generous spirit of drivers wanting to help non-drivers who are genuinely struggling with the car-free life, but I don’t want anybody feeling embarrassed or guilty about not going all Good King Wenceslas on my ass.
I sometimes feel irrationally embarrassed about offering things that are common courtesies. Like offering to share a snack I prepared with a house guest, or offering someone a ride when a group is going from one place to another. I don’t understand why I feel this way, and I know sometimes I wind up appearing (or flat being) rude. Then I’m embarrassed about that too, but sometimes it isn’t enough to overcome my embarrassment at offering.
