I was going through a old Blogspot page I had/have and found this to share. (don’t know where I stole it from).
Seeing as we have gone through various lockdowns, quarantines, etc, I thought this may ring a bell for some of you out there.
“Family are like underpants. Some crawl up your ass, some get a little sideways, some are your favorite, some are holey, some are cheap and just plain nasty, some of them are full of shit, some you don’t know how you got them, and some actually cover your ass when you need them to.”
My old Granny had a bunch of granny-isms. She was a quirky funny woman.
When she made very outlandish statements occasionally I’d question her vast knowledge on the subject she’d hold her own.
As my Daddy said I am an exasperating individual. That being said, I’d continue to prod Granny.
She’d get flustered and say “I forgot more than you’ll ever know, young lady!”
Thereby ending the conversation.
I think I’ll start using that debating tactic around this place. I’m tired of proving my point to the jokers I live with.
I’ve often wondered about that “I’ve forgotten more than you’ll ever know” concept. How would you know how much you’ve forgotten? Not that it would have fazed your Granny, of course.
Notice how the phrase, “Gas station,” applied to any noun lowers the quality (at least in your mind)? Examples: Hot dog, nachos, restroom .
Here’s a brand new one: The other day, I was in Walmart and stopped by the optical department to make an appointment for new glasses. I was talking with the optician about wearing contacts long ago and she let it slip that when she was 18, and getting her first pair of contact lenses, she bought them at a gas station.
I’m still chuckling to myself – “gas station contact lenses,” whoulda thunk it?
I’m changing phones, so I was downloading photos and came across one of a sign we saw outside a restaurant in Rome, prohibiting hipsters. Too lazy to upload it to an image sharing site, I did a quick google. Hell, its not a sign, it’s a meme - you see it everywhere:
I hope the person who first thought of it has made some money, but I doubt it.
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