Why do I have facial hair?
The same reason my hair is the length it is (which varies) or that I wear boots instead of sneakers or that I wear jeans instead of cargo pants or that I drink tequila instead of bourbon. I like the way it look and feels.
A beard without a mustache just looks stupid. Unless you’re going for the Leprechaun look or planning on becoming Amish, it’s just wrong.
Well, some people (obviously not you) find them attractive. So a man who thinks he looks good with a 'stache might grow one and possibly attracting a mate who like them could be a bonus.
Well, that’s an important point - not every man looks good with a 'stache. Not every man has enough beard to be worth growing - my husband, for instance, has quite a lot of Native American in him and the result is very sparse facial hair. I think he shaves his face once, maybe twice a week, whether he needs to or not.
And that is an excellent reason for YOU to not grow a mustache. If you don’t like your hair that way, then don’t wear it that way.
I wouldn’t want to live in a place like that 'cause they’d make me wear a bedsheet over my head to go outside regardless of how I wore my hair. Hey, I don’t think either one of us would do well in a place like that.
Well, OK, you personally don’t like 'em. No problem, every one is entitle to an opinion. But are you saying you wouldn’t hire someone with a mustache? That seems a little harsh. I mean, I personally don’t like soul patches and think they’re silly looking and do nothing to enhance a person’s look but I’d never say that to someone with one, nor would I ever tell them to shave it off or refuse to hire them for that reason. After all, just because I don’t like them doesn’t mean other people don’t find them wonderful.
As for workplaces - my personal opinion is that unless there is a real hazard/safety concern employers have no business dictating hairstyles of employees. A very few, high profile jobs (model, actor, etc.) might be an exception to that. For some jobs a beard is a hazard and it has to go. Hey, for some jobs my long hair would be a hazard and would have to go. But for most jobs it’s not relevant to the job.
Again, of course, I realize society might have a different view than I do.
It’s all about preference. Some guys with perfectly full heads of hair shave their skulls bald. Why? Because they want to. Sideburns, mustaches, and beards are all male hairstyles that women (with a few oddballs exceptions) just can’t grow, so maybe some men enjoy displaying them as signs of being adult men. Or whatever.
My hubby had a mustache from the time he was 16 until just a couple of months ago (he’s 50 now). He grew it because at the time, he had this huge zit-from-hell on his upper lip, and every time he tried to shave it, the zit would bleed and bleed. But then he got used to it, and he liked it.
He shaved it a couple of months ago because, even though his almost-black hair only has the occasional glimpse of a silver strand, his almost-black mustache was coming in about 50% gray, and he thought it was making him look older.
I like him without it, but I liked him with it, too!
I started growing a mustache as soon as I could, because facial hair is a sign of testosterone. I continued once I got the impression that my mom didn’t like it, as a teenage rebellion (it later came to light that she thinks it looks nice on me, but I’m guessing she figured that a mustache was innocuous enough and didn’t want to push me into some other rebellion). I’ve never grown a beard because my dad has a full beard, and I’d rather not take after him. And now, I’ve gotten so used to it that I don’t see any point in shaving it off.
Just over 10 years ago, sitting down for lunch with co-workers I mentioned to one of them, a short Portuguese man with a heavy moustache that he reminded me of Mario or Luigi.
Next day he came to work without a moustache.
Many years earlier, before the phenomenon of Mario and Luigi I had an Italian co-worker named Mario who fit the same description. Only he would compensate for his short stature by unabashedly pulling out his enormous shlong at every opportunity to pee without any attempt of privacy. (We worked outside as surveyors on a major highway construction project.)
Oh god, chinstrap beards are even worse.
Since you seem to be an expert on the subject of amazing facial hair: Which of these styles should I adopt?
Well, folks, I’ve had a mustache for about 60 years (right after got out of basic training in the army).
I have no idea why I grew it, but most people, including my wife, think it looks good on me. Even though it is white now.
Among the things to be aware of is that you have to trim it, you have to be careful drinking soup, you must brush the crumbs out of it after eating bagels. And most of all, you have to be very, very careful when blowing your nose. 
I grew a 'tache because I can. I grew my beard because I can
'nuff said!
I grew a 'stache early on in the Navy. Then when beards were allowed again, I grew a beard. Then beards were banned for people of a certain rank, so I cut it off and had to comfort my frightened children who had never seen me without facial hair. The day I retired from the Navy, I started growing it again and it’s been there since (20 years at this point).
Obligatory link to Cracked article: “Ten mustache styles that must be stopped”. 
My hubby has sideburns, which I think is very sexy.
Yes, whenever I look in a mirror my 'stache tells me what a fine face I have.
You may not hire someone with a 'stache; other people wouldn’t hire someone who can’t spell “complement.”
Salvador Dali would never have become famous without his mustache.
Simple answer: moustaches and bathing suits are necessary for ski lessons. Loch Lomond Pine (slow to load)
** Mustaches. Why??? **
Mustaches. Why not???
As the old adage goes: location, location, location.
I think that a lot has to do with the moustache’s location.
Sideburns are the bookends for my enormous brain. The 'stache and patch? Well… that’s just for the ladies…
Seriously, it’s like any other choice of fashion, its owner thinks it looks good on them (or attracts the desired reaction). Just because one doesn’t look good on you, or even many people you know, doesn’t mean it wouldn’t improve the appearance of other faces and personalities.
Another thing is, your beef is really with those men you find facial hair unattractive on. Might be a selection bias. Look around you, you might not even realize just how many men wear some sort of facial hair / mustache combo only because it looks natural, or even good on them.
LOL right. :dubious: