Among the other advice in this thread, I suggest taking this as a time for the OP to teach their child the four cardinal rules of talking with cops when under suspicion:
I work at a high school and, uh, no they don’t. The kids who smell like pot are. . .shocker, the stoners. Same goes for the teachers, funny enough.
Only if she’s 100% sure her son isn’t doing drugs. Otherwise, this is going to be real humiliating for her.
Obviously go to the doctor and find out if your child actually has this disorder- because it’s very important to get a formal diagnosis so he can get the help he needs. But then, drug test your kid. Autistic kids smoke pot sometimes, too. These things aren’t mutually exclusive.
I agree with this.
I know you don’t want to hear this, but this could be all for the best.
Falling asleep in class on a regular basis, to the point where the teacher cannot wake you, is not the sign of a normal sleepy teen. It’s a big problem that needs to be addressed sooner or later. What do you think is going to happen in college? Or in the workforce? A smart kid can slide through high school with decent grades, but it’s going to get a lot harder fairly quickly. You are going to have confront this at some point, it’s not just going to go away.
Disability or no, a teacher can’t have a student full-on passed out in the classroom. Being conscious in kind of the bare minimum of classroom performance. If you can’t offer that, then it actually is time to start looking for alternatives. Being passed out is not something a teacher can accommodate or just work around.
Not all alternative schools are hell houses. I had quite a few friends who benefited from a less structured classroom setting. Mostly they had independent study programs and met for a half-day a couple times a week. Yes, there were some “problem students” in the program. But there were also a lot of kids like them- bright kids who for whatever reason just didn’t mesh with the standard classroom.
Contact the groups that have been suggested. Do some research on what alternative programs exist in your area. Be open to new ideas. “Let’s just pretend this isn’t happening” is no longer an option.
Good luck! I’m sorry you have to deal with this, but maybe you are taking some important steps that will be good in the end.
First I want to say that the process of what happened to your son is not defensible beyond the part where he was questioned about a substance. The 10 day suspension would be reasonable if he was either seen or caught with tobacco, but an admission negates that.
The assumption of drugs and an expulsion hearing seem a very drastic, but I would agree that having at least a consult with a defense attorney would serve you well. If this was a case of admitting guilt due to being a captive audience, a drug test would be great and there are exceptions to all cases. As I don’t work in your district though, I can only relay what I know from where I work.
As a parent, I feel for you and wish the best for your son and you.
[QUOTE=EvilTOJ]
He wasn’t even on school property when the pot with pills was taken.
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As for the two statements above, a bus stop IS school property and falls under in loco parentis in accordance to Tinker v. Des Moines, NJ v. T.L.O., and Hazelwood v. Kuhlmeir, among others.
Also, Campus Police, depending on district, may have different authority than a Metro cop. In Clark County (Nevada), our Campus Police do have the same authority as Metro: http://www.ccsd.net/directory/police/faq.php, but when criminal charges are possible, Metro is usually called in.
So was this a campus monitor/security that was in the office? That would explain a few things. Was his locker or body searched? If that was the case, crying foul over due process would be much harder prove I think.
So many great responses!
China Guy - you are a peach! Thank you so much. I am saving your post.
Well, today we had the appointment with the principal, and while we were enroute my cell rang. It was the secretary asking if we could postpone for 45 minutes, the principal wasn’t ready. Fine. When we were enroute the second time, my cell rang again. Could we come tomorrow at 4pm? Well, we were literally in the driveway of the school, so I said, “We are right here, so we’ll be right in and confirm.” When we are walking in the main door, a police officer is going in, too. He enters the office right behind us and asks the secretary, “What did you need?” and she looks at him and say, “I just want you here”. WTF? We have done nothing in any way at all that is threatnening to them, and she call a police officer because we say we are coming into the school? Unreal!
I guess they may be trying to provoke us, but we are determined not to give any ammunition. We are going in there tomorrow cool as cucumbers.
Anyhoo…we did have the official blood and urine testing done this morning at the lab, BUT we also did an unofficial test at home, and guess what? It was NEGATIVE. We are sending this sample off to the company on the box for the official confirmation. I know it is not definitive, but I feel pretty sure the other tests are going to be negative as well.
If we have two negative drug tests from two different companies, I don’t see where they have any kind of a case.
Are you sure the officer was for you? Maybe it was for whatever was going on that caused the principal to postpone?
If not, that’s truly bizarre.
You are well within your right to not sign anything unless you clearly understand and agree with all of it. We refused to sign a couple of times because the goals stated verbally were not written down and/or promised testing was not yet performed. Remember also that 1) an IEP is backed up by the IDEA, a set of federal guidelines that a school system must follow if it wants to continue receiving federal funds; and 2) you can call for an IEP meeting at any time to make changes or address concerns. Having one in place makes it much easier to amend it to include other accommodations that you have documentation for.
NOOOOOOO!!!
The kind of “alternative school” they’re talking about is NOT the kind this kid needs. The kind they want to send him to is for druggies and hoodlums and would be a NIGHTMARE for an Aspie. It could, quite literally, destroy him.
This boy DOES need educational support - but NOT in a special school in general (though sure as HELL he needs to be away from THESE ASSHOLES).
I’m speaking as the parent of a 16 year old with Asperger’s.
You really should look into whether the sleepiness has a medical component. My son has no such issues (and aside from being a nightmarishly bad sleeper as a newborn and toddler) never has. And he’s impaired enough that he’d never have gotten this far without being diagnosed with something.
GET A LAWYER. One who specializes in educational law. This boy was steamrolled into confessing something that he didn’t do just to get these people off his case. One known problem with people on the spectrum is that they cannot properly respond to social cues or pressured situations.
Your son needs to be in a regular school setting with educational support, NOT a self-contained program of ANY sort, if he’s made it this long in a mainstream setting. Hell, my son has been mainstreamed (with some team taught and some self-contained) since 4th grade.
We don’t know what the school documented, but according to the OP, what he confessed to is exactly what he did do. Or at least what he told her he did.
Mama Zappa, you got it. As for “educational support” we are going our THIRD day of no work being sent home. He has no textbooks because they won’t let the kids take them home, they told me they would send work & books home at the end of the day on the first day which was Thursday, no work sent. Friday, day two, no work or books sent…they said they would send it by his brother, they didn’t. Today is day three, and still no work sent home. We can look on the teacher website for the assignments, but again, they didn’t send any books to him, his workbooks are at school, too because he left them being graded when they sent him home at half the day on Thursday.
I feel like they have literally thrown him away. He is getting further and further behind and all they are concerned about is that we pose some kind of threat to them and they need protection from us. They obvious do not care.
I don’t want to get the cart before the horse, but if the official drug tests are negative and this expulsion hearing goes our way, then I want them to:
That’s IF I even want him back in their school at all. Part of me wants to throw the negative tests in their face and promptly withdraw him before they get a chance to officially expel him.
But I won’t do that, because you know what? Depsite all of this my son truly wants to go back. He misses his friends and he misses school, believe it or not. So I won’t do anything to make it worse for him.
He told her he took two puffs off of a cigarette but he wasn’t sure what kind it was. They documented that he “admitted in front of witnesses to smoking pot laced with a probable narcotic”
No shit, that is what the report said. “probable narcotic”? Like he said that. And like they know that.
Yes, admitted smoking something but nobody knows what it was. Now did I read him the riot act for how incredibly STUPID that was? Hell yeah. I told him that if he ever, ever did anything like that again I would stomp him into a mud hole, so that’s one thing.
BUT the reality is, it could have been anything from one end of the scale to another, from a clover cigarette to marijuana with PCP. They assumed it was something from the worst end of the scale, but it could have been the other end.
I realize this at home test we did tonight is not the definitive answer, we need the official report back before we know for sure, but am encouraged that it is negative. I think the evidence is starting to show their assumption is wrong.
So, like I said, what he actually confessed to is what he actually did. I was replying to Mama Zappa’s assertion that he was coerced into confessing something he hadn’t done. Which he didn’t.
I am not denying he smoked something. I don’t think that is the point. It is WHAT he smoked. They put words in his mouth, IMO.
You are correct, and I saw that on rereading.
Yes, I think we’re talking past each other here. I’m not suggesting he smoked anything illegal – I don’t know whether he did or he didn’t. If his version of events that you recounted is accurate, it seems that they did put words in his mouth.
But I think at least some of the point is that he smoked something, no matter what it was. 1) If he hadn’t smoked at all (no matter what it was), he wouldn’t be in this mess to begin with. And 2) even taking a couple puffs off of a clove cigarette (the best case scenario, perhaps?) is most likely against the rules.
For what it’s worth, I do think it’s a pretty bad thing what you’re having to go through with this. I just don’t think the extreme responses – by the school or by the people screaming about the 5th Amendment, Miranda rights, getting a lawyer, etc. – are helping the situation at all.
sulamith, I haven’t posted as of yet, but I have been reading the entire thread so far—I taught for 6 years in a public alternative high school here in Salt Lake City, and I have to tell you that no matter what happens, I don’t see the school officials apologizing to you and your son, telling you that it’s all their fault. It just is NOT going to happen like that.
I know it dosen’t seem fair, but your son admitted to breaking the law to his principal and to a school cop. They are going to use that admission as a shield to hide behind, and they will NOT back down and tell you that they over-reacted.
If I had to guess, no matter how this situation plays out, your son is going to be in the principal’s cross-sights as long as he attends that school. Let him know he will be watched like a hawk from here on out.
Good luck!!!
Matthew, (who thanks God every day that I no longer have to put up with the trainwreck that is the US public education system.)
Inigo, I let the other go, but you really need to dial it back.
Thanks,
twickster, MPSIMS moderator
I agree with the poster above (ETA oops, quoted the wrong post, I meant a poster further above) that you won’t be getting any apologies from the principal or anyone else connected with the school. You’ll have to let that need go.
If your son wants to be able to return to school what might be best is also what might be the most difficult for you which is to go in there and say thank you, we were unaware of the severity of the problem and we’re working together as a family and with professional support to address these issues.
Yes, it will be hard to let go of your position as the injured party, and yes your son deserved better than the way he was treated, but a stoner who sees the error of his ways and wants to do better is much more acceptable to the system than an angry family threatening to hire a lawyer.
You may have to decide what your priority is here, is it getting them to admit they were wrong or is it smoothing the way for your son to return to school?
Garfield226 - Point well taken. I realize smoking anything is still breaking the rules, so they have him there. He did wrong by doing that and he’ll have to admit it.
Here’s the actual rule he is accused of being in violation of:
“The use of illicit drugs and the unlawful possession and use of alcohol are wrong, harmful, and illegal. Therefore, no student shall possess, sell, use, transmit, handle, display, distribute, or otherwise use or be nder the influence of any narcotic, hallucinogenic drug, amphetamine, barbiturate, marijuana, any other controlled substance, drug paraphanalia, over the counter or prescription medication, alcoholic beverage, intoxicant of any kind, or any substance represented to be illegal drugs or imitation controlled substance while on school property, on the way to and from school, or at a school-sponsored function.”
I underlined the parts I am guessing apply to this situation.
It doesn’t say anything about tobacco or clover, etc…
If the other drug tests are negative, I also realize that they will just say it only means he didn’t use enough to show up in the test, and it doesn’t mean he didn’t do it.
That’s why I am pretty much resigning myself that I am going to have to spend my Christmas budget on a lawyer to argue the points of this case because I think we going to get hosed if we don’t.