My ass hurts, dammit.

The BBQ Pit
1

Okay, technically, it’s my tailbone. I think I broke the damn thing, you see.

I went kayaking this last weekend- Barton Creek was nice and high, and it’s been a while for me. So I dug out my inflatable kayak and all my equipment, and headed down to the greenbelt.

I had a blast- the creek was flowing nicely, and while it didn’t have quite as much water as I would’ve liked, I still had a better trip than I have in quite a while. A few times I had to pry my butt off some rocks, but in general I made good time.

Until, that is, I hit the Chute. It’s a section of the creek where the flow goes through three smooth switchbacks. It’s not a technical challenge at all, really- you just kind of hold on for the ride.

So, there I was, zipping through the three switchbacks… and, well, apparently there was a nice, sharp rock hidden in the current.

I didn’t so much as hit it as the river decided to give me a rock enema.

Holy crap it hurt. I still had another hour to go on the river, but somehow I made it.

Now I can’t sit up straight. I’m fine when I stand, and when lie down, or when I sit back- but when I sit up, like I’m doing now, it’s a dull, throbbing pain. If anything it’s gotten worse in the past two days. I just KNOW that if I go to the doctor, he’ll give me some Ibuprofen, and send me to get an x-ray. Then he’ll say, “Yep, it’s broken. No, there’s nothing we can do about it. Gimme twenty bucks for the visit, twenty for the pills, twenty for the x-ray, and try to stay off your ass for a month or so, m’kay?”

Uh, doc? I work at a DESK all day long- ever tried to stand while working on an animation?

Goddamn motherfucking shitbrain goatfelching asscracking son of a BITCH this hurts!

2

Okay, maybe he will do all those things, but you sound like you could use the pain killers. Or you could spend the $200-$300 for a new fancy computer chair that you don’t have to sit upright in.

Or you could spend the rest of your life in pain - these things tend to go on a while.

But hey, it is definietly worth my sympathy, and you have that!!

3

Ugh. Tailbone injuries.

I have a history of slipping and falling on ice at least once per winter. Every single time I manage to at least bruise my tailbone. Don’t ask me how…there’s enough padding back there to practically bounce me back upright. But it HURTS! And it lasts for weeks, if not months. And there’s NOTHING they can give you other than the standard painkillers. Everybody jokes about having their ass in a sling, but nobody ever does anything about it! :slight_smile:

So my completely empathetic sympathies, Lightnin’. I’ve been there. Multiple times.

jayjay

4

Oh dear…

My mother broke her tailbone when I was a child and it still affects her!

I don’t even want to imagine the pain…

5

I fell on some stairs in elementary school, a long time ago. I managed to twist as I fell so that the stair made maximum contact with my tailbone, if you get my drift. Hurt like hell.

I still can’t sit through an entire movie in one place. Hurts like hell.

What quack doctors are you going to that you can get $20 visits and x-rays?

6

I put a hairline fracture in my sacrum in a moshpit during college. I was told by non-medical friends there was nothing to be done for it, it just had to heal on its own, which seemed reasonable. You can’t really put a cast on it or anything, I suppose, although I think someone told me they will give you a nifty cushion to sit on.

A kid a few years behind me in elementary school shattered his coccyx in a much more serious playground accident, and ended up having to wear this bar holding his knees far apart so he had to walk around bowlegged, like an extreme cowboy caricature. The poor kid had to wear this thing daily for well over a year.

Hoping maybe it’s a bad, bad bruise for you, Lightnin’. Get some a’ them painkillers-

7

Wikkit - $20.00 Dr. visits - he probably has medical insurance!

Lightnin’

at least use it and go get some painkillers - ease the pain a bit! don’t suffer!

8

Get a note from your doctor so you can get away with putting your feet up on your desk, for heaven’s sakes. That and a pillow or two in the right places might help enough to get you through most of the day without crying or screaming at your co-workers. And take the pain pills, properly used they’ll dull the sensation enough to make it much more comfortable when you have to get up and use the restroom. (No, I never busted my tailbone, but I did have a back injury…thank goodness for the friends that help you get into and out of the car and drive you to the doctor!)

Even if you know what’s wrong, if you can afford a doctor visit, it’ll cover your behind in more ways than one.

Corr

9

Get yourself to your doctor.
Buddy fell on her ass, turned out it wasn’t broken or anything, but like twisted or something? The doctor did the equivelant of pushing out dents on a car, stuck a finger up her ass and popped the tailbone back into place. No more pain (well a bit, but not for too long).

10

Can you get one of those big inflatable donuts to sit on?

11

A number of years ago my wife fell backwards and managed to crack her tailbone. In addition to the pain she had to endure jokes from all our friends about having her ass in a sling.
Unfortunately, this happened a few weeks before we were going to drive down to Orlando with some friends. We soon found out that the most comfortable possible for her was to lie on her stomach in the back seat of the van, so all the way to Orlando I had either her head or her feet in my lap. Fortunately we were able to rent wheelchairs at Disney and Universal so she was able to get around. Somewhere I have a photo of her walking through the Disney parking lot clutching the pillow she carried everywhere we went.

12

Preview, dammit! “possible” should be “position”

13

You know, the first thing I thought when I saw the title was that I should post a safe-sex message, just for Scott Evil.
It’s a bit juvenile, but, well, there you go.

Secondly, as a cyclist… ow, man. Maybe a gel pad? Frankly, it’ll wear on you, but I’d advise standing as you work. Yes, I know how much of a pain it is, but… Probably your best option. I did the same once, and I worked standing up for a month. Still hurt, but… well, what’re you gonna do?

14

See if you can find one of those “kneeling” balans chairs or knock-offs. That’ll at least keep you off your butt for a while.

(Do a google search for “balans” or “kneeling chair” or “Stokke” and you should find a few dealers. )

15

We have one of those kneeling chairs, and I have to point out, they’ll make your knees hurt after a few hours on them. It’s nearly impossible to spend an entire day at your desk (whether working or gaming) sitting on one.

16

Maybe a pebble broke off in your butt. You really need to go to a doctor or a geologist and have that checked out.

17

I fell off the top rung of the monkeybars while at recess. Got to go home for the day and spent much of the afternoon and the next day on my stomach. I’ve also sat on one of my sisters’ razors while getting into a bath and fallen out of my desk chair at home, the former never completely healed and the latter resulted in a caster arm planted directly between my butt cheeks.

18

<hijack 'cos of Jeff Olsens post>
I sat on an AXE! Somone had stored it edge-up tucked in beside the last step of a flight of stairs to a basement, and I dropped my 4 year old self onto it and cut a big damned slice off my right ass-cheek!! Trauma! But strangely no scar?
</hijack, well he started it!>

19

Lightnin’, a friend of mine suffered the same injury as you (he hit a rock while canoeing) and was in terrible pain. He thought he had injured his tailbone, but it turned out that he had (burst? caused?) a pilonidal cyst in that area, and when the cyst was excised by a doctor, his pain went away.

My brother developed a pilonidal cyst a few months ago, and he described the pain as feeling like you’ve bruised your tailbone…it might be a good idea to go the doctor and get your ass checked.

20

Would a pilonidal cyst be considered to have a ‘head’, like non-uber-pimples? If so, would the doctor be pulling your head out of your ass?

SDMB, the only place where “it might be a good idea to go the doctor and get your ass checked” is common serious medical advice and not an insult or straight line.