Earlier this year I mentionedthat my aunt got a kidney transplant. Briefly, she had several health problems, but received a kidney transplant. However, numerous complications kept her stuck in bed for 6 weeks, and the kidney ended up failing and having to be removed.
Since then, she was moved to a skilled nursing care center and was trying to recover. However, a couple weeks ago, she fell and broke her hip and pelvis. I don’t know if it was delerium from the medication or what, but she tried to get up out of her wheelchair on her own.
Anyway, she’s been struggling with getting enough to eat. She was already thin and week from years of partial kidney function, smoking induced breathing problems, and cardiovascular issues. Six weeks in the hospital with digestive issues took whatever fat reserves her body had, so she just didn’t have any ability to take more stress.
I found out Monday that they had talked about surgery on Saturday to implant a feeding tube to try to increase her intake. They had discussed that she would need a ventilator for the surgery, and because of her lung issues, she might never come off the ventilator. She refused to go on the ventilator, so that cancelled the surgery, and essentially made the decision. She didn’t have an upswing left, just how fast things would deteriorate. She went downhill quickly. By yesterday she was mostly unconscious or unresponsive.
I got a phone call this morning that her blood pressure had dropped to 70/40, so death was imminent. And I got a call just after 3 pm that she died sometime around noon.
Funeral arrangements have to be made, and plans adjusted.
It sucks. I’ve known it as a possibility for some time, with her health issues. Since the surgery, there have been some really rough patches, but she had appeared to be getting better - at least trying to get back what she had before the surgery. But then the fall. This still was a bit sudden. I was thinking she was holding on.
At least she made the decision on her own terms. No long, drawn out period comatose on dialysis and a ventilator. She watched someone else go through that, and didn’t want that to happen with her. So she made her own decisions. The family is coping.
I didn’t get to see her at the end. I did try to call, but she was mostly unresponsive by then. I will miss her.
And it also has me reflecting that this is one more notch on the aunts and uncles starting to pass, and where my parents are in relation. My dad is 71. He’s very healthy right now - runs 2 miles or excercises 2 hours every day. But he has blood pressure issues. My mom will be 70 this year. She’s not as active or in shape, but as a woman her statistics are nominally better. She has a variety of little things, but is mobile and alert and has no major conditions.
It’s rough.