I am stressed right now. My 6 y/o son was diagnosed with Autism when he was 2 1/2 years old and over the years we have struggled with him to help him learn and enjoy his life in a way appropriate to his age and circumstance. He has recently gotten really good at peddling his bike with training wheels and was whizzing up and down the street so we took the training wheels off. Well, he got really good at that as well but now he doesnt stop he goes all the way around the corner through our subdivision out to a busy semi major street.
Coupled with that is he now knows how to open the garage door- we moved the button to the highest it would go- about 4 feet above his height and there is nothing in the garage for him to stand on to get it opened. Yet he is getting it opened, hopping on his bike and escaping down the street.
Today was the furthest-and as I chased him screaming “stop Eric stop” the faster he peddled, un aware of the dangers and right out into traffic . Im screaming stop stop eric stop -hysterical as he just passes in front of a truck hauling a boat. He turns around in the turn lane and gets back in to traffic to get away from me as traffic swerves and slows down. He drops the bike and stands in the street. I grab his arm and rush him back to the sidewalk. I am panicked with tears down my face.
Hell- it probably will never get any easier with him when he gets older- but at this rate I’m afraid he’ll never make it.
The only thing I can suggest is to lock up his bike and lock the garage door - as in, press the lock button. Maybe even get one that requires a passcode, like the ones they use on the outside. I’m sure they make them and if not I may be able to rig one up from my old garage door.
Best of luck, though. Hope things get better and all that.
I was thinking if I were too short to reach our garage door button I would hit it with a rake or broom handle of which there are a fair number in said garage.
My autistic son is 13, and I never allowed him to learn to ride a bike. It was enough trouble to keep him from escaping the house when he was younger, without having him on wheels.
People with autism, have little or no since of danger. They also can not be controlled with “rules”. Because of this, you will spend the rest of your life protecting him from himself, and trying to smooth things out when he steps outside the rules of normal society. But don’t worry, that last part shouldn’t be a problem until he hits puberty.
Bike riding is not a necessary part of childhood for an autistic child. Give him books, puzzles, drawing supplies… Sit back and let him amaze you with his gifts. You’ll both be happy and safe.
My Aspergers son can’t ride a bike. I guess I should be thankful. Anyway, in the past, I wrote on the sidewalk in chalk so he can see he’s gone too far. Also in the past, he didin’t respond to “stop” so I used “red light” instead. Both of those worked fairly well.
I’ve got a more worrisome issue going on right now with a neighbor boy playing a game called “Double Dog Dare” with my son. I instructed my son that the area covered by a bathing suit was his private area. I guess I didn’t tell him directly that other kids bathing suit areas are supposed to be private areas, too (and my son splits hairs like that). My son does not understand other people’s motivations at all and is easily mislead. Anyway, I’m going to have to call the other kid’s mom tonight to tell her what her son was up to with mine and I’m really not looking forward to this. I’m not calling until I’m a little less PO’d. That kid and mine are not a good mix, and I thought I was supervising them pretty well. I think I’m going to have to ask that they not play together anymore.
Oh shoot- by “more worrisome” I meant “for me, right this minute”. I assuredly didn’t mean to imply that my issue was more worrisome than almost being hit by a car!
Please excuse my poor wording. I was thinking of my situation.
We’re changing the garage entrance door lock to a keyed lock tonight.
The scariest part of losing him outside is that if someone abducted him, he would never cry out or ever verbalize who, what or where. I always keep him close by-today I just happened to be in the bathroom. Its not fair to his twin sister (no autistic issues there, maybe a little aspergers) or his older brother but a lot of times they are look outs for him too in our enclosed back yard. I hope I’m not messing them up by having them keep a watch on their escape artist brother.
We have a big sister- tattletale- lookout, too. Thank goodness.
I have a hyper alert for my son’s location although it’s not completely foolproof. Even if I can’t see him, I can almost always hear him because he hums or monologues. I usually locate him by listening.
I’m really irritated with myself for this issue with the neighbor boy. I know these two need constant supervision. I thought I was doing a good job of watching them. I’ve had doubts about this boy before and now I just think he’s a sneaky sh*t.
May the lock work well! Gotta be hard keeping it out of his sight though, I’m sure!
I’m glad my sister’s always lived on slow rural roads. If my nephew got out on them (and by now he’s getting old enough to understand better), nobody’d be going over 20 anyway.
I once asked Temple Grandin for a suggestion as to how to explain to my autistic son the dangers of running out into traffic. She suggested letting him see me drive over a watermelon.
Innnnnnteresting. Nvme77 would have to determine whether that sort of demonstration would make a lasting-enough impression on her son; I think it might have an effect on my Dweezil (high-functioning / Aspie-ish). Some kids might forget it the minute it was over, or not make the mental connection, though.
We’re fortunate in that Dweezil has never been an escape-prone kid. Friends of ours did have that situation (I don’t think a bike was involved though) and it was pretty hellish on them.
Nvme77 - I’m glad that your son is OK. What a terrifying experience
Could you restrict bike riding to somewhere safer? When my kids want to ride their scooters or bikes, we take them to the local college campus or a park that has a long, wide track around the perimeter. That way there are no streets to cross.
