My bank is run by morons

About 4 months ago I switched from the national conglomerate bank because the local branches were pissing me off. One closed at 4pm, were rude and often ignored me in the drive through. The other ignored me when I wanted to open a savings account, and tried to give me a hard sell when I wanted to close the checking account (whose total balance was pretty paltry, and not worth the effort, which the manager discovered after the hard sell).

I opted for a local bank. I was greeted on the way in the door when I wanted to open an account. Low minimum balance, ATM fee refunds, the people were polite, friendly and helpful, lines were unheard of, and the branch was much closer to me.

They announced about 3 weeks ago they were being bought out. They called it a merger, said they were joining the XXX family of banks. I assumed there wouldn’t be a problem. They said my ATM/debit card wouldn’t work on Monday, and I wouldn’t be able to activate the new card until Tuesday, so I should prepare, take out some cash, have it handy. This was not a big deal, really, though I rely on the debit card 100%. I’ve not encountered a business here that does not accept it.

Come the Monday in question, I’ve still not received the new card. I tend to be asleep during business hours. I recently moved, and recently went in to the bank and had my address changed. This is probably the reason for the holdup, I assume.

I have to interject here and say I was still receiving plenty of mail from them. I hoped each one contained the new card. The first letter I got was forwarded by the postal service. They’d gotten to the point where they were sending something like 4 separate statements a month. One for each account (checking & savings), for some moronic reason. I got extra this month, probably due to the merger. One said “last statement: July 16, this statement: July 19” and had about 3 transactions on it. I even got a postcard directed to the proper address reminding me of the Monday when my card won’t work.

BTW I hate bank statements. I can view them online at my leisure; I’d rather they not be taking up space in my waste bin, or be used to steal my money.

My SO spoke with them yesterday during business hours, when I was asleep, trying to figure out where my card was. Apparently it had been returned to the issuing card company’s HQ. The CSR mentioned something to do with coming in on Thursday. So basically I’m now without funds for four days instead of one. He mentioned I can go in during normal business hours and get money. No shit, sherlock.

I get something in the mail today from the new bank about a transfer of $20 from my account to another. Right. I sure as hell had nothing to do with that. It’s 11PM though, and there’s nowhere I can call or visit to find out what the hell this is about. The online banking was supposed to be down since the merger, and I was supposed to log in to the new service. I haven’t logged in to either for a week. I try the new online service and it tells me my account is locked.

One thing - I’m lazy as hell. I don’t want to figure out whose account number this transaction went to, even if it’s mine. I don’t want to call you up or visit to find out what the fuck is wrong. My biggest issue with them is that they’re making their problem (the merger) into my problem, and assuming that I’d be happy to deal with it.

This pisses me off. I’ve got enough on my plate. If I wanted to start a new account at a new bank, I would have to go through all this shit. I did, not that long ago, and now I’m tempted to switch again. Here now I have a problem because some rich bigwig needs to line his or her pockets a little better. Now I have the temptation to go down to the branch and get pissed off at their polite, respectable, helpful employees who have jack squat to do with all this avaricious, bureaucratic bullshit. They just smile and deposit my checks, and do a damn good job of it. It’s not their fault someone in corporate didn’t think to mail the card a goddamn month ago, made it available at the branch, or have it fucking overnighted to my address so I don’t close my account.

I misread the Thread Title as “My bank is run by mormons”.

I read through the entire OP, interested to find how how the OP knows his/her bank is run by Mormons, what problems the Mormons are causing, and just why the OP thinks these problems are Mormon-specific problems warranting a rant against the Bank personnel’s Mormonism.

Only after reading the whole thing did I realize my mistake.

Preach it. I’m lazy, too. Especially when it comes to dealing with the damn bank. It pisses me off to no end when EVERY SINGLE DAMN TIME my bank sends me a new ATM card, they ask me whether I’d like to use the old PIN, which I’ve got memorized, or a new random PIN, and I tell them I’d like to use the old PIN, which I’ve got memorized, and they have never once honored that request. The most maddening thing about this is that I’m currently walking around with a card whose PIN I don’t know, because when I got the little “your PIN is…” card in the mail, I disregarded it, knowing that I already knew my PIN, and when I explain this to people, they act like I’m the incompetent dipshit in this story. Of course, the fact that this has happened to me several times now from the same bank probably makes me an actual incompetent dipshit for not picking up on and preparing for what should by now be expected incompetence on their part, but come on. I don’t understand why they go to the trouble of asking me if they’re just going to ignore my request.

This is, of course, the same bank who won’t stop sending me mortgage offers to my WASHINGTON STATE address, and yet after years of receiving them, when I finally wanted to get a mortgage, they acted like I was some kind of nut because OF COURSE they only offer mortgages in California. Oh, and no, but I’m sorry we can’t stop sending those offers. Thanks.

I gotta get a new bank.

I recommend buying a shredder for bank letters. Tossing them in the trash is kind of asking for it.

Oh, wait, how about the ever popular site key verification that seems to be on all 3 banks’ websites. So now, when I sign in with my laptop instead of the regular PC, I have to go through the whole process again, and figure out where is that damn ATM card that I never use.

I have a feeling I know this bank. It’s a POS for sure. That’s why I only bank at Credit Unions. Much better service, IMHO.

Gotta love it when banks consolidate or otherwise change practices for your convenience, when things were perfectly convenient for you as they had been.

We tend to be pretty conservative regarding the banking services we use. A while back the huge bank we do all of our business with was bought by an even larger bank. Along the way we had to jump through hoops a couple of times essentially just because they chose to change their name. And it seems that every time they notify us of some wonderful new service they will be providing, it is accompanied by notification that they will discontinue one more of the few services we actually like and use, or imposing yet another fee for something that has always been free and that attracted us in the first place. Crazy shit.

And how about when they offer “no fees on certain ATMs” only to find out that those “certain ATMs” are ONLY the ones on their branches, and for some reason, the law allows an establishment to dock you $2 just because you’re using an ATM that they’re housing (like convenience stores and other banks).

Charging an individual to withdraw THEIR money from THEIR bank accounts should be illegal.

Well, Zions Bank was founded by Brigham Young himself*, and it totally sucks**.


  • fact
    ** opinion

Do folks agree with this? Because I’m not quite sure I understand why DG thinks establishments such as convenience stores ought to house ATMs if they aren’t allowed to make a profit from it.

If you have an account at Bank ABC, you can walk into any ABC branch, go up to a teller, and withdraw money from your ABC account. Do you think you should be able to walk into any Bank XYZ branch and withdraw money from your Bank ABC account? If not, then why should it be different with ATMs?

They tried ending all ATM fees in California. The banks’ response was to prevent people from being able to take money out of a foreign ATM.

You use your ABC Bank ATM card at a ABC Bank ATM, they don’t charge you. You use it at an XYZ Bank ATM, you’re depleting that machine of money that an XYZ customer might use. Add in the fact that XYZ Bank will have to notify ABC bank to balance their books, and you’re paying for the convenience of using a foreign ATM.

If you don’t like it, use your own bank’s ATMs, or use your debit card when you’re buying groceries and get a little extra when you pay.

Those “certain ATMs” being the ones that your bank actually owns. Why do you expect your bank to be able to set policy for how other people’s ATMs work?

Just worried I might have been missing something obvious.

Think about it though. Seven tellers, each one a wife of the bank president!

The new bank wouldn’t be Charter One, would it? They screwed up nearly everything they touched. Left my name off the checks, left us in limbo with no account when they had computer problems, etc. It was awful.

Are you seriously telling me that it’s reasonable to be charged $2 to withdraw $40 from an ATM, regardless of where it is?

I don’t care who owns what – I don’t understand why everything needs to be profitable. Why not just offer it as a service to your customers?

The bank could easily say, “We don’t charge our customers for ATM transactions. We’ll eat those costs. Send us a bill.”

I can’t believe that people are OK with banks just passing this expense off to their customers.

Ah, yes. And if you remember back when ATMs were first introduced, there were no fees. They wanted you to use them because of all the wonderful savings the bank was going to make from not having to pay the tellers previously required to complete your transactions. But somehow banks are not saving that money anymore. They’re losing it to having to keep the ATMs running. :rolleyes:

I think its perfectly reasonable. I assume ATMs cost money to purchase and operate, if some people never ever use their ATM card then I’m sure they’re happy to trade no-fee ATM access for some other perk. There are plenty of banks that offer free home ATMs, so its not like there’s no other option out there. I mean, its not like we have a constitutional right to get cash out of our banks accounts at 2 in the morning.

My bank reimburses me for other bank’s ATM fees (up to $6/month - but that’s plenty).