My Beautiful Mommy -Why Mommy's boom-booms are bigger & her tum-tum is smaller

God bless this modern world!

My Beautiful Mommy

I’m feeling a little queasy. As for the illustration from the book, no living woman will (should?) ever look like that.

You have to laugh. It’s just hilarious how low people can stoop to justify, and even rejoice in, the most egregious sort of superficial, consumerist waste.

The part I found funniest was that it was the plastic surgeon who came up with the book - and the plastic surgeon IN the book looks exactly like Superman. I wonder what Dr. Mike really looks like? Come on, that’s hysterical. This is comedy gold.

Mommy needs implants cause her SUV makes her boobs look small.

The part I found funniest is that it is a vanity published book with no ISBN, no distribution, and no real hope of ever reaching any sort of audience–even if people wanted to read it.

Thank God for small blessings.

You have to admit, it’s just heartwarming how courageous Dr. Mike is, to have gotten through medical school and been board-certified all while suffering from microcephalism.

I swear, I thought from the thread title that y’all had had a baby. And I was, like, “Wow, did I ever miss that memo…” :smiley:

To be fair, here, it looks like that sometimes after he performs surgery, their kids ask awkward questions, so he made up a little booklet to help explain it to them.

I hate superficially unnecessary body modifications too, but it’s not that bad an idea, it’s a reaction to what happens after surgery, not a recommendation as a standard book for school libraries.

As an antidote, may I offer the Russian folktale My Mother is the Most Beautiful Woman in the World.

Is that book for real? It looks like a parody from MAD magazine.
And it looks like Dr. Michael had too many trips to the surgery himself. How can he even walk through normal doors?

“You see kids, mommy has been conditioned to hate herself, by unrealistic media portrayals of female bodies, and rather than telling her she doesn’t need to do that, we’re going to change her. Oh, and considerably lighten her bank account, too”.

Far be it from me to defend the media, but it was probably her husband’s idea. Us men can be right bastards.

Still, it might stop him having an affair with their teenage babysitter.

Hmm. “Why Daddy Traded Mommy for the Babysitter” might be a good sequel.

“Yes, darling… and this is so important to Mommy that she’s going to put her very life at risk simply in order to look better. Don’t worry, darling, if Mommy dies, Daddy will find you a new Mommy.”

Maybe mommy wants to have an affair with the paperboy.

…and we’re going to teach you to do it, too–starting really early.

Double-ugh.

I’d hit it.

With a baseball bat.

Perhaps the super doctor has a friend who is a super lawyer. The good ones always travel in packs. :smiley:

Would a heated pestle do?