As the SDMB roving reporter, I was lucky enough to have an interview with someone who went to HALO’s little Hiroshima Day party.
Me: Can you tell us, Halo-esqe person, what happened during your Hiroshima-Day Party?
Oh, it was just lovely! First, we chanted AMERIKA SUX! fifty-one times. Once for each state, and once for Guam, a province I don’t particually care for.
Then, we built a paper-maiche cannon (like the ones that fired those nukular missles at Hiroshima?) and put some flowers in the barrel. It was sooooooo moving.
Then on to cupcakes and juice!
Following that, our spirits renewed after our long, arduous struggle by the yummy carob-and-no-refined sugar cupcakes and all-natural cabbage juice we listened to whale songs. (Whales don’t build nucular weapons, 'cause they’re smarter than us.). I wept openly at the beauty.
Following that we held hands and sang the the Whoville chant from THE GRINCH THAT STOLE CHRISTMAS but we changed the lyrics to make the REAL Grinch that stole Christmas for millions of Japanese people who were victims of an AMERIKAN war of agression. I rewrote the lyrics! The real lyrics are something like “Baho-dooray, baho-moray, welcome Christmas welcome all!” but that’s culturally imperialist and redolent of Dead White Males! My version goes
AM-ER-IK-A SUKS A LOT
for 43 verses. People got very emotional.
We then had an encounter session. I expressed my guilt at being me. Everyone agreed and said they felt the same way. This made us feel better.
The exhausting pace was grueling, so, in honor of the poor people starving all over the world, we had a pre-lunch snack of plain brown rice to raise our awareness of their plight. I cried, cried openly. Then we had a light lunch of brie, omlettes and a nice fruit salad.
After lunch we had naptime. So MANY people don’t realize the value of getting plenty of rest while changing the world and raising people’s conciousnesses!
Next was tea and cookies. They were yummy and reinvigorated us for our hunger strike which was to last from 1:55 pm to 4:30 pm.
We then had speakers. Oh it was electric! The topics ranged from AMERIKA! IT SUKS! to AMERIKA FASCIST INSECT NUCULER OPRESSORS, so all viewpoints were given a fair chance. One small sour note. Some evil racist brought up the utterly irrelevant point that lots of nations (India, Pakistan, etc) also have nucular weapons. Of course we denounced him as the racist he was. Luckily, he didn’t “bring us down” too much!!!
Next we went to our anti-war love-in. In it, we all agreed that war was bad and never solved anything or helped anyone. Ever. And if only people were as enlightened as us, there would never be any war ever again. Even if someone was being oppressed or something. No-one can stand up in the face of non-violent resistance. Can you imagine how ashamed Hitler would have been if Ghandi had simply sat down in front of his armies? If Ghandi had been as enlightened as us World War Two would have been over in minutes. We all agreed on that.
We then stopped for a pizza break. Made with FULLY ORGANIC WHEAT! I’ll bet that showed those multi-nationals!
We ended the day with a non-denominational prayer to the higher powers (or plea to humanity , 'cause of the athiests) for peace.
Oh Diety, if you exist, or Humanity in General (if you don’t)
Why can’t you be (or make people be) more like us?
We are the enlightened ones.
We college students are worldly wise and spiritually enlightened.
Everyone else is an ignoramus.
We’re thinking thoughts that NO ONE has ever thought before.
If only people would stop their cultural imperialism and be more like us, things would be soooo much better.
We hate the gutless
We hate the lowlives
We hate the ignorant
We hate the twisted
And most of all we hate the haters.
Oh yeah: and…Amerika Sux.
Fenris, your roving reporter