My Diabolical Plan Worked!

(and I didn’t even HAVE a diabolical plan!)
Long, but I’m really excited…
Almost a year ago I took a job as scheduler in the business where I also work as a caregiver. I thought, and the boss thought, that it would be 20-25 hours a week, which was perfect. Of course, it ended up being more like 40+ hours/wk, which was not so perfect, as I also provide some caregiving in addition to delivering newspapers every morning. I loved it, but it was wearing me out.
A couple of months ago they offered me an official, salaried, full-time position–they were hoping I would give up the paper route. And I thought I would…but as I considered it, I realized that I really don’t enjoy being gone 8a-5p every day. I’m not good at the gig, as hard as I tried…I miss the kids, I can’t figure out when to buy groceries or cook, I’m tired all the time. Honestly, I do not know how people who have “normal” jobs do it. (Hats off to them. Seriously.)
I declined the offer, and they hired another scheduler, and I’ve been working just a few hours a week, which was fine. I kept telling myself…who knows? One of these days they might need someone 15 or 20 hours/week, and it’d be perfect! It could happen, right?
Well, it did! Last week they decided to change roles among the office staff and create a position for me…20 hours/week! I’ll be doing the same work I was, but fewer hours. I’m thrilled–I keep my paper route, and I still get to work in the office with people I really love working with. This is exactly what I wanted when I first started.
Yay! It really wasn’t a ploy or plot on my part, but it worked out perfectly.

When a diabolical plan works, you’re supposed to laugh like this: “Mwah-ha-ha-ha-ha!”

I’ll wait.

Are you rubbing your hands together with glee? Do you have a mustache you can twirl? (Oh, wait, that’s dastardly plans. Never mind.)

So. The first time, you thought . . .

But . . .

So now they’re going to . . .

You’ve seen this movie before. Okay, let’s all place our bets now. How long before this job is 40++ hours per week too?


Hope you’re twirling your moustache with glee!

Nah, it should work out fine. The person taking over the main scheduling is very good at her job (I’ve been working with her the entire time), and all I will be doing is assisting. My schedule is set but flexible, which works out for me. If I were willing to do it full-time, they’d hire me into it, but they know my boundaries and will respect those. And it’ll be easier for me to insist they do, because I knownow that someone else is there and able to do the job.
It’s all good. Bwahahahahahaha!!! (How’s that?)
ETA: I don’t have a mustache, will it work if I twirl my hair?

It has to be long enough to hold down by the side of your mouth.

Why didn’t you just drop the paper route?

I really thought, when this (initial) offer came up, that I would do just that–drop the paper route and have a normal job, like a normal person! I made up my mind, spent a lot of time looking at my schedule and calendar and daily home/kid/free time…but I just couldn’t come to terms with it. When I looked at it all again, I realized something: I really LIKE doing papers. If I could deliver papers for another hour or so a day, I’d never look for another job. It pays great (more on the hour than the office job, actually), I’m out on my own looking at the stars, I hardly ever have to deal with customer issues…it’s practically perfect.
My best choice, financially and mental health-wise, is a combination of both jobs. I get the best of both worlds–the solitude and independence I love on the paper route, and the interaction with other adults that I need in the office, with the added bonus of working with my friends.
My 13 year old put it best, when I told him I was considering a “normal job”–he said, “Mom, we aren’t the kind of people who have ‘normal jobs.’” It’s funny, but he’s actually kind of right.
Financially, doing this makes more sense–I will make the same money (from both jobs, totaling about maybe 35 hours/week) as I would if I quit the papers and went full-time at the office, at 45 hours/week. And the burnout rate will be slower, I hope.

Nope. Persian cats are acceptable, or maybe one of those evil hairless jobbies.

NO!!! I have this mental picture of papergirl wearing her pink helmet with sparkly, multicolored stars, riding her fuscia Pee Wee Herman bike in the pre-dawn hours while chuckling softly to herself as she daintily tosses the perfectly folded daily news neatly onto each customer’s porch, right side up and facing the door.

Don’t take that away from me.

This made me smile so much! :slight_smile: And I totally agree.

You must be one of my customers…

She wanted her$2…? :wink:

congratulations on getting just what you want! I can see wanting to be out looking at the stars but the getting up so early…it’s the middle of the night :eek: how do you do it?

Excellent! /Mr Burns

I get up at about 330 and am out the door by 345 every morning, maybe a little earlier on Sundays.
You get used to it after…oh, two years or so. :slight_smile:

No. You’ll need blood-red nail polish, then you can go with a slow, evil, smile, while putting your fingertips together and/or caressing a cat/important object.