My filked parody of "Walking in Memphis"

Cafe Society
1

I wrote this in response to a challenge from my wife as she headed off to board a plane to the Memphis airport, and I thought I’d share it with you all.

(To the tune, obviously, of Marc Cohn’s “Walking in Memphis”)

Took off my blue suede shoes – put ‘em… into the box
Right there by my hair gel and my shampoo
And I stood there in my socks
Walked through the detector – man, I hope it don’t go off
If it does, that big inspector will have me turnin’ my head to cough

I’m at the airport in Memphis
And I’m hoping that I’ll make my connecting flight
Yeah, the airport in Memphis
Is not an awesome place to spend the night

Someone dressed like Elvis
Is sittin’ by my side
He followed me up to these plastic benches
And he smells like something died
He’s got peanut butter on his jumpsuit
And the grease from something fried
I just couldn’t really feel any more surreal
No matter how I tried

I’m at the airport in Memphis
Just sitting here to watch the freak parade
At the airport in Memphis
Man, I hope my flight won’t be delayed…

I was hoping for some music….
And some awesome barbecue…
But all I can get’s… a nasty hot dog…
Costing seven ninety two-ooo-oo-OOOO…

Because I’m miles from downtown Memphis…

Maybe next time I’ll drive it
And my Beale Street trip will come to pass
But this time I’m at this airport
With no feeling in my ass

Crap! My flight got canceled.
Now you know that just ain’t right
I swear I’m going to make it out of here
But it SURE won’t be-eee tonight

I’m at the airport in Memphis
Wishin’ that I had something to do
The airport in Memphis
Has got me feelin’ lonely, tired and blue…

The a-airport in Memphis
Has a special something in the air
Th’ AIRRRRRR-port in Memphis
Smells like sweaty tourists and despair…

Took off my blue suede shoes – put ‘em… into the box
Right there by my hair gel and my shampoo
And I stood there in my socks
Right there by my hair gel and my shampoo…
And I stood there in my… socks

2

I thought “Filked” meant Sci-Fi folk? This is just parody, right?

3

Now that I’ve gone and looked, I guess you’re right. Thanks for zeroing in on what’s really important.

Mods, feel free to remove the word “filked” from the title of this thread so nobody else gets upset.

4

Are people really that anal about the word filk?

Bravo and well done for those lyrics, Chef Troy. You really caught the feeling.

5

Thanks! I’m thinking about going out for karaoke and singing it this way. :smiley:

6

I like it. And I don’t care if you call it a filk or a parody.

7

A deft touch with the lyrics on that one. I particularly admire the chorus.

8

Sorry. Words… even new words… have meanings.

9

I know, and I’ve gotten into arguments over whether you could call the corpus callosum cable-like because it transmits information. In my mind, at the time, a thing wasn’t cable-like unless you could lift a volkswagon with it. Other mileages varied.

Unfortunately, in my mind filk means modern folk: a take-off of a song done some time after fantasy and science fiction fans embraced that particular typo. So What Child is This? is not a filk, but The Good Ship Bodacious is. In my mind it a matter of chronology rather than subject matter. So Queuing in Memphis (sorry, Chef Troy) would be a filk. . . . in my mind. YMMV.

(Ever checked the history of the word ‘nice’? That sucker’s meaning has shifted all over the place.)

((And filk or not, the song is still a cool take-off.))

(((Oh, and The Good Ship Bodacious is about a rocket ship, so it would be a filk by either definition.)))

10

I write a lot of these,* and people often show me their first efforts, and this one tops 'em! The two big mistakes most people make are near-rhymes and off-rhythms. This avoids both.

*Okay:

IF I HAVE TO PISS IN A BOTTLE (“Time in a Bottle”)

COPYRIGHT JA 2010 by Sam A. Robrin or whoever the hell it is who writes these things. Go ahead and use it (hey,I lifted the melody), but if you make a little money on it, I want some!

If I have to piss in a bottle,
As employers have lately proposed,
I’ll say, “Speak no more of it–
Take this job and shove it
Where solider waste is disposed.”

If I have to fill up a pee cup,
And fill out a W-2,
Don’t know what makes me madder–
Empty wallet or bladder,
But I’m too pissed to pee-pee for you.

No, there doesn’t seem to be enough room
To go about your private life
In this nation.
I’m getting ill and ulcer-y
From yielding to compulsory
Urination.

You’ve picked to inflict micturition
Like a sycophant shilling for D.A.R.E.
I can hold it and hold off this holdup you’re holding,
And go do my business elsewhere.

But there doesn’t seem to be enough love
For people’s rights and liberties
In this system.
If perqs require them to piddle,
No one living off the grid’ll
Have missed 'em.

11

I can’t speak for anyone else, Push, but what rubbed me the wrong way was that it seems your only purpose in even commenting in this thread was to sniff about my inexact usage of the word “filk.” I mean, jeez - I’m a professional editor/proofreader by trade, and I would never randomly correct someone like that unless he or she asked me to. It makes you seem pedantic and overly fixated on how right you are. You’re kind of sucking all the pleasure out of my light-hearted attempt to share a fun thing I created with my fellow Dopers. :frowning:

12

applause

Well done, Sam A. Robrin! Jim Croce (or should it be “Crotch-e”?) would love it.

13

I, too, am a professional proofreader and copy-editor (and as long as we’re citing credentials, I’ve filked at conventions with Filthy Pierre, Margaret Middleton, and Robert Asprin), and believe a fun little word like “filk” is perfectly acceptable in a variety of applications!