I have one of those bodies that while isn’t all that rugged or amazing for a man, is awesome for a woman. I have a nice shoulders, good legs, and a relatively flat stomach. To this I added a black dress whose skirt was a mere three inches below my butt and was so tight I could barely squeeze a pair of socks in the padded bra I was wearing, black half-calf boots, black fishnet stockings, black nails and lipstick and a red wig. My roommate did my makeup and threw on two halloween orange/black false eyelashes. Since the party I was headed to was outdoors I decided to throw on my black business jacket and I threw around my neck a black feather boa. I was probably the hottest redhead in las vegas on Saturday night.
And apparently, all of the guys I ran into agreed.
I had a 5 o’clock shadow partially hidden by makeup, but since I was outdoors in a very poorly lit area, no one was going to notice and no one did. ABSOLUTELY NO ONE, including people who knew me, knew who I was until I started talking, and they were only a few feet away from me. I met some people and was dancing, and there’s no one around us, this girl I’d never met before walks between the three of us and looks right at me. I looked at my friends and said, “That chick just did a flyby on me!” Clearly the costume was a success. But there was more.
I went to the JW Marriot’s Cigar Club to hang out with some people from the party. Again, nobody had any idea I was a man in drag. My cousin went as an Oompa Loompa and the two of us got quite a few looks going through the casino. After hanging out for a while and getting some food and drinks my cousin and I walked back out the casino the same way we came.
As we passed one table, a bunch of guys cat called and whistled at me. Not wanting to ruin their little moment of lechery by speaking, I merely bowed my head in thanks and kept on walking out.
Some of the more quotable quotes from that night:
“You look too good Sanscour.”
“You’re exactly what I want, except I want it to be a woman.”
And the best part of the night was when I was walking to my car and I passed two guys:
“Hey.” they said to me.
“Hey.” I said back.
Guys do double take, and a combo laugh/groan/bizzaro noise.
So the moral of this story? NEVER EVER hit on, stare at, or whistle at a woman on Halloween weekend, you may be doing it to me.
Anyone else have interesting Halloween stories from this weekend besides me?
Sanscour
