My impression of a bad troll-posted thread

The BBQ Pit
1

OP
HeY youz guyz! Wuzzup? I’m smokin a phat crack rok rite now and i’D like 2 share it with U but I wont cuz ure basturds. Yea U heard me! U sed bad stuf about my girlfriend, BaCkStReEtboyGURL, so i’m hear 2
defend her honur! like me, shez inteligent, smart, funny, and skiny unlike all U fat bitchez that sit around and watch oprah all day!!!
so my queston is what can i do about my crak addiction? Also what are youre favorite colors?

poster#1
Boy you’re dumb. Idiots like you need to drop off the face of this Earth!

(thread begins to fall down to the bottom of the page until…)

poster#2
Noooo! Don’t feed the troll!

(in saying this poster#2 not only adds another notch to the post count [the measure of a troll’s success], but moves the thread up to the top of the page, making it more visible to people who might not have seen it down there at the bottom)

poster#3
Hey! I’m 5’2 and 350 lbs. and I take offense to your post. You’re shit in my eyes, you dried up wad of diaper-eating gopher shit!!! And besides I must be beautiful because my boyfriend says I am!

author of OP
Dam, ure a whole lotta woman! i bet U could eat a whole rack of beef if U werent 2 wide to fit thru the door of the walkin freezr!

poster#3
You’re a prejudiced sack of decaying mule innards!!!

author of OP
oh so now ure resorting 2 calling me names? did i ever call you names? no i didnt. i just asked a question and nobody is helping me!

poster#4Hey OP’er! You spelled “intelligent” wrong in the OP. I guess that proves how smart you really are! HA ! Did you know that spelling ability directly correlates with IQ scores? I bet you didn’t
cause you’re DUMB! HA !

poster#2
You’re feeding the troll! Don’t feed the troll! Starve him like the distended-stomached Etheopian he deserves to be!!!

poster#5I also think we shouldn’t feed the trolls. By the way, this is my 500th post. 350 of them were “me too” posts. I’ll be starting a new thread to commemorate my achievement.

poster#6Crack addiction is a serious problem, OP’er. You should seek some help immediately.

author of OP
Maybe if poster#3 smokd some rockz and shot some smack she wouldnt be so dam fat!

(And on it continues until a moderator wakes up and closes the thread. The OP’er either gets bored and leaves or changes his
screen name and makes a similar post. See if nobody EVER under ANY circumstances, posted ANYTHING to this thread, it would slip
down to and off of the bottom of the page in a matter of hours. Yeah it’s been said before, and no, it’s not a big problem on the SDMB compared to other BB’s and ESPECIALLY Usenet, but I still think it’s funny to read these troll threads. Often the responses are almost as funny as the OP!)

2

I refuse to respond to the above post.

3

Puff,

You really are making this too complicated: if you have a drug problem, you just could have asked for our advice. Hey, we’re an open minded bunch ! Uh, some of us are, anyway…

Coldfire

“You know how complex women are”

  • Neil Peart, Rush (1993)
4

continued…
poster#7
Hey poster#3 you sound hot! Let’s get together and do the horizontal bop sometime!

poster#3
Thanks poster#7! You sound pretty hot yourself! I don’t know if you can handle me though!

poster#8
Hey poster#3, I saw poster#7 first and he’s mine! Don’t make me kick your ass!

poster#7
Girls, Girls, no need to fight over me. I can be shared!

poster#9
I agree with everything that poster#2 said and futhermore I think everything he posts is so smart!

poster#2
Thanks poster#9!

poster#3
lol Yeah, but I’m the jealous type and I don’t share my men.

poster#10
Your statment about “fat bitchez that sit around and watch oprah all day” is unscientific and has not yet been proved through the course of a double-blind study.

poster#9
I agree with everything that poster#10 said. Furthermore I think that everything he post is so smart!

poster#7
Hey girls! (posters#3 and #7) I’ll show you mine if you show me yours!

author of the OP
DaMm! Is it AnY woNder ThAt I smokE crack? ThiS threAd driVes me To it!

5

You’d know!

6

RTA,

Are you meaning to imply that I’m a crack cocaine user?

7

:slight_smile: Thanks! That was funny. :slight_smile:

8

And once again supports my theory that if people would just fucking IGNORE them, they’ll go away. I for one am sick of hearing people bitch about trolls, but they post in their threads! It’s sad to see people who get their jollies feeding these morons. If people could get a grip and ignore them, they would stop posting altogether. Each and every response to their stupid diatrabe is a “notch” for them.

Amazingly, seemingly intelligent people seem powerless to ignore trolls. I’ll never understand it.
Zette (on a rant again)

For more rant, see my thread in the pit “Do we really hate trolls?”

Love is like popsicles…you get too much you get too high.

Not enough and you’re gonna die…
Click here for some GOOD news for a change Zettecity

9

Send this to Sunbear for his classic collection.

10

Yeah, me too!

Peace.

11

poster #11
Quote: “Maybe if poster#3 smokd some rockz and shot some smack she wouldnt be so dam fat!”
Really? Do you have a cite to that effect? Can you prove that? Because I weigh 425 pounds, and I smoke crack continuously, and I haven’t lost any weight.
poster #12
What? In that other thread you said you were an anorexic pyromaniac who never touched any drugs in your life.
poster #11
Are you calling me a liar? I have suffered my whole life as an obese crackhead, and I don’t deserve to be called a liar by you. I have never been so insulted in my life!

The IQ of a group is equal to the IQ of the dumbest member divided by the number of people in the group.

12

poster#13
Hey, poster #12! Yur an idiot! I completely believe poster #11!

poster#14
Is that because you created your account today, never posted on anything but this message board, and your personal file is exactly the same as poster #11?

poster#13
No! I have no idea who she is! is never heard from again

JMCJ

Die, Prentiss, Die! You will never have a more glorious opportunity!

13

Posters 15-22: Hey, let’s all talk about Bj0rn now!

14

bjorn: the where without is the be originaly, you have to make more logic as argument otherwise nothing is none. there is no argument. orz happy camper, learn to taste the slide. slide with us?

15

Konrad, as lame as your jokes usually are, this one is CLASSIC :slight_smile:

c0ldfire - language is a tool, like pen and newspaper, i belive

Coldfire

“You know how complex women are”

  • Neil Peart, Rush (1993)
16

yeah…real nice.
why didnt anybody notify me about this? it was just lucky that i opened this thread and read it to the end. i could have missed it.

bj0rn - its nice to know that i have fans :wink:

17

Okay, whose job was it to notify bj0rn this week? Are you my bj0rn’s keeper?

The best lack all conviction
The worst are full of passionate intensity.
*

18

And yet another thread has turned to bj0rn, sparked by andros’ sarcastic comment about this very phenomenon. It’s like the friggin’ Twilight Zone.

The IQ of a group is equal to the IQ of the dumbest member divided by the number of people in the group.

19

Coldfire sez:

Speaking of double-edged comments, have you stopped beating your wife yet?

20

Why, yes, Konrad. I have decided to stop beating my wife and devote my entire free time to beating Ignorance & Bad Spelling. Like “sez”.

<<rimshot>>

Thankyaverymuch. I’ll be here all week !

Coldfire

“You know how complex women are”

  • Neil Peart, Rush (1993)