Ayesha, I wish you and your family comfort during these tough times. I know it’s extremely tough, but please continue to be strong.
Finally some good news ! The doctors came in and checked Mom today, her left lung was actually moving some air, not a lot but some so the radiation is working to shrink the lagest tumors (one in her left lung filled the entire upper lobe) and the one one the bronical tube it’s self… It may not be much but I will take any small victory we can get !
I am so sorry that your mom has been through so many problems, but it sounds like she still has a fighting spirit, and that is so important. If you haven’t already seen it, Steven Jay Gould’s essay “The Median Isn’t the Message” may be some encouragement: http://www.cancerguide.org/median_not_msg.html
I’m glad to hear that the tumors seem to be responding to the radiation. It’s true that the small victories are important. Hope that you guys get some more good news soon. 
Ayesha, I went through all of this when my mom had lung cancer 16 years ago. I’m glad your mom told the docs to stay out of her room if they couldn’t be positive! I’m also glad to see they’ve got her pain well-controlled.
Here’s some advice, take it FWIW. If it gets to a point where they say she has 6 months or less to live, contact Hospice immediately! They’re a wonderful organization with wonderful resources, and can be a tremendous help to you, your mom, and the whole family. Hospice is not just a place for dying people to go; they also have home nurses who can come to her. My mom had a Hospice nurse, and she was wonderful! Also, when that point comes, help your mom understand that she doesn’t have to do anything she doesn’t want to do! Whan my mom was at this stage, she was having heart attacks, and the doctors kept ordering blood gas tests on her. They were painful, and she hated them. I kept telling her “Mom, tell them ‘no’. Tell them that you will not agree to have this test! They just want to fill in all the blanks on their forms, but you don’t have to agree to these tests just because the doctor says to!” She would never disallow the tests, though. Also, my mom couldn’t stand Ensure, but she liked McDonald’s shakes. She drank at least one every day. She also drank a beer every evening, to stimulate her appetite (it was a real problem for her towards the end; in fact, her doctor was trying to get her THC tablets to “give her the munchies”, but didn’t have time to push the paperwork through. I offered to get her some pot off the street, but she wouldn’t let me do it).
It’s a hard journey, honey, but it does end! {{{Ayesha}}}.
We just went through the same thing with Ivylad’s father…he was given 2-3 months to live, and that’s about how long he lasted.
It sounds like they may still be able to treat your mom’s cancer, so hold on to that for now. But please consider the quality of life she may have for what she has left. I will also echo norinew in having the doctor contact hospice. They are wonderful people, and can make your mom as comfortable as possible.
These things are never easy. We’re here if you need us.
I’ll echo norinew on that. Hospice workers can make such a wonderful difference in the time left, for you and you mom. It’s not giving up but rather a reorientation toward the quality of life remaining.
I’m wishing you and your mom strength, hope and comfort, Ayesha.
Veb
Thank you all for your support. Mom was released from the hospital yesterday, she doesn’t have to go back to radiation until Thursday then a plan will be formulated foe the rest of the treatments.
She is a bit stronger and is eating better , she is as cranky as she can be ( she was ready to knock people out at the hospital yesterday), but the best part is the tumors are shrunk enough that there is some air moving in the left lung where it was doing nothing before because it was totally blocked.
They aren’t giving us any better odds but Mom is being positive and is determined to fight as hard as she can. Believe me my Mom is a survivor, just being my Mom was an ordeal in it’self add to that the 4 other daughters she has had and the general hell her life has been. If anyone has a chance it’s Mom.
We know about hospice and trust me when/if (I have to hold some hope myself or go insane) the time comes we will call them. I will NOT send my Mom there,( the thought terrifies her after my Grandmother ) but they can send someone to the house. My Mom like my Grandmother before her does not wish to die in a hospital or hospice but at home, I will do my best to see that that is where she is when her time comes . There is no other way, I don’t think a hospital could handle our family ( Mom has 5 surviving brothers and sisters plus her own children and greown grandchildren)
Thank you again everyone.
** UPDATE **
Ha ! Take that cancer ! My sister who is at Mom’s right now sent this email out , it is too god not to share with all our friends here.
** Dearest Family and friends,
I just had to send news of God’s greatness:
The doctor has given us wonderful news. Mother’s tumor has shrunk and we will start radiation again on Tuesday and go for 4 days until the following Monday - then we will discuss Chemo - the doctor said that if mother kept doing so well we could do chemo and now mother’s prognosis is good - that means we have more time - if we get the chemo this could be permanent. She is doing better every day but it will be a long road to follow. She needs to continue to eat well, exercise and have no stress. Please forgive us if we do not get to call everyone with mothers progress but our energy is spent taking care of her.
Sister’s name **
So keep those prayers and positive thoughts coming folks, between them, the Doctors and treatments things are looking up ! Even if this is just going to buy us a little more time I am happy dancing today. Ohhhh yeah baby !
That’s wonderful news! God bless all of you…
Yay! I am very happy to hear that she seems to be doing so well. I hope that you do indeed get to have a lot more quality time together. My continued thoughts and prayers go out to your family.