Disclaimer: Not seeking medical advice. But I’m not stupid.
My mother in law got it in her head her 75th birthday would be her last. Her SIL died suddenly and quickly right around Christmas last year and her brother is not handling it well.
MIL has smoked most of her life and has recently been diagnosed with emphysema and depression. She said her bloodwork came back fine, but I have a feeling she’s either lying about that or misunderstanding it or sailing down a river in Egypt.
We visited her a couple of weeks ago and while we were there she took two naps and declined our invitation to go out to dinner, which is unheard of.
Yesterday, IvySIL came home (MIL lives with them) to find the garage door open and the car trunk open, full of groceries. MIL was fast asleep in bed. She said she was too tired to unload the car.
She’s also been coughing up blood and has lost 18 pounds in two weeks.
Like I said, I’m not stupid.
IvySIL called MIL’s doctor, who told her to get my MIL admitted to the hospital, which was done last night, so they could run tests. I have a feeling we’re going to find the bloodwork is not fine after all. She had a bout of pneumonia earlier this year and never seemed to recover her pep after it.
I’m pissed that she didn’t take better care of herself, scared this is really it, and worried for Ivylad and his sisters.
It’s her choice, of course. I don’t think she’s been truly happy since my father in law died, about 11 years ago. We keep trying to buoy her spirits…we have a cruise planned in March with her and the SILs and some of the nieces and nephews. I think she’s just been…waiting.
My husband and son went to the hospital to see her today. They did a bunch of tests and will be doing a lung biopsy via a bronchoscopy (I think that’s right) and a stress test tomorrow. She thinks she’ll be home tomorrow, but I don’t think that’s likely.
It sounds scary, but who knows? Keep us posted so that you can vent or bounce ideas off of us. You know Dopers, we do online support groups pretty good.
My wife lost two sisters to cancer this year, the younger in March and the older in May. You have my heartfelt condolences (if it turns out you don’t need them, keep them for a rainy day).
I’m sorry. My sister was diagnosed with lung cancer after being treated for a month or so for an upper respiratory infection. She wasn’t a heavy smoker, but our family has a history of cancer, and my father and his sister both died of lung cancer.
After taking the dog to the vet (arthritis flare up) we got a call from IvySIL. Mom has been diagnosed with lung cancer.
But.
When we got to the hospital (Ivylad will be spending a few days in that neck of the woods while I go to work) IvySIL helped us load his suitcase and wheelchair in her car. She told us that MOM is the one who told us she had lung cancer, after a visit with the cardiologist and the oncologist, who told her she would have to make a follow up appointment with him.
Both IvySILs and Mom had a later conversation with a nurse, who said they don’t know if she has lung cancer, which I’m leading toward believing, because she hasn’t had a biopsy done. They had to stop the bronchoscopy because the doctor pulled up a chunk of bloody tissue, and she failed the stress test (although, they gave her the stress test AFTER they told her she had cancer, so I’d like to know of anyone who could pass after getting that news.)
She’s still coughing up chunks of what IvySIL says looks like bloody jelly and she’s not eating much. She’ll be in the hospital a few more days as they continue to run tests.
That’s the way it was with my mother and brother. They suspected it was lung cancer (and, IMO, they had a pretty good hunch on it), but could not confirm it without a biopsy. In my brother’s case, it turned out true. But my mother’s case was so *advanced she was not physically able to take the procedure. So on her death certificate it mentions ‘lung disease’ as the cause of death, but nothing about cancer.
*My mother started feeling ill on a Friday, and her health deteriorated dramatically, dying on Saturday of the following week.
I think the pneumonia she had earlier this year knocked her for a loop. Since then her voice sounds frail, crackly, and soft, not her normal voice at all.
Hopefully we’ll get some answers soon. She lost another six pounds last week.
Ivylad and his sisters talked to the oncologist today. He said that she does have lung cancer, that it’s probably stage 3 or 4, but he needs to wait for some test results.
She had a test where they snake a camera through a vein in the groin to check the heart. You have three veins to (arteries from?) your heart, but she only has two, since one is completely blocked. But since it happened so slowly, her heart managed to make its own bypass.
We’re still waiting for the test results to find out what stage the cancer is in. Mom had an MRI of her brain and a CT scan of her stomach, because this type of cancer can spread to the brain or the stomach.
The doctor was talking about quality of life vs quantity, which tells me he has a pretty good idea this cancer is pretty advanced.
She’s home from the hospital and a nurse will be with her for the next two weeks, I presume to keep an eye on her, make sure she eats, etc. They said it wasn’t hospice.
Mom said she was going to fight it, but from what the doctor was saying, the treatment may be very debilitating with not a lot of return.
Confirmed: Stage 3 lung cancer. There is no cancer in her stomach or brain, so that’s good. They’re going to do a PET scan then they’ll discuss options.
I’m so sorry! I suspect my mother died of lung cancer, but by the time she started to develop symptoms, she had a fairly advanced case of dementia and was frail (and also 84) so the docs didn’t pursue a diagnosis very hard. It wasn’t fun but it wasn’t awful either - she wasn’t in pain. I wish your family the best.
