My neighbors, the Sims

And you can stay over as long as you want after they go to sleep, so long as they don’t ask you to leave. And they tell the SAME DAMNED JOKE all the time!!!

But don’t hit on the wife/husband while the spouse is in the room. Then the slappin’ starts. Just invite them over singularly and you can steal them away if you wish.

Do they burn pizza?

Do they wear diving helmets?

Do they pee in the front yard?

Thank God! At last I’m in the right neighborhood!

Oh, I figured they’ve either heard every possible joke or never heard of it at all, so why bother?

And don’t feel miffed if you call and they don’t answer, or you ring the door and they don’t open it. They’re probably involved in a long, brutal session of cleaning up four plates. Or working out.

Ask them if they left their last home because the mayor dropped a meteor on their house. If that’s the case, send them my apology.

If you invite them “downtown,” and they become tired and/or hungry, they will likely shake their fists at the sky and whine.

Soon soon!

don’t play charades with them. You might get turf head.

If they tell you to leave, do so. Otherwise, after they go to bed you’ll get stuck on their property and starve to death.

If they bring out the telescope, don’t go near it unless you want to abducted by aliens and molested to the point that your personality does a 180.

Watch out for mysterious cars that come in the morning and pick your neighbors.

Update on my neighbors, the Sims.
They’ve bought I think about six or seven cords of wood.
Should I be concerned.

Oh, god yea. Sims and fire is probably the worst combination in the world.


Do they have any Gnomes in the front yard yet?