My neighbors, the Sims

I have new neighbors.
The mailbox says they’re the Sims.
Can anyone tell me what to expect?

You’ll have to learn to speak their language. Start out with a few "froobidoo"s and "shwa shwa"s. Also, watch out for ghosts.

They will hump anything that moves.

In SimGolf, they liked “Mishuno” a lot. Say that.

Don’t play strip poket with the mom!

Stock up on fire extinguishers.

Expect them to soil themselves regularly and then scream in frustration.


Don’t play strip poker with the mom!
preview dammit

I think strip poker with a Sim would be interesting, and time-saving. All they have to do is twirl around and they’re changed…or unchanged, I guess.

They will probably sit in their hot tub all day and only get out long enough to eat or smoke a bong. That’s what mine do, anyway.

Oh, and their sense of time is wayyyyyyyy off.

It takes them 45 minutes to walk out the door and get to the car so they can get to work.

And you may have to drag them into the toilet, then nag them to flush and wash their hands.

This dar is freyushay
Dag Dag!

Don’t leave any potions out on your chemistry set, unless you want them to turn into a monster and break all your electronics and flood the toilets.

Expect them to bring lots of chocolates, flowers & fruitcake every time you invite them over.

Nuh naaaa ni na nah.

Don’t accept an invitation to swim in their pool. They might remove the ladder, in which case you’d meet certain death.

Como luvs nut!

Go up to them and talk about models of atoms, politics, and boats all within a few seconds.

If they don’t have burgalar alarms you can rob them with impunity. The funny thing is they’ll have photographic evidence of you taking their stuff but unless the cops catch you in the act you get off scott free!

If you’re over for a visit, and they start setting up fireworks inside the house in rooms whose floors are covered in various rugs, get out quickly. The doors to that room are likely to be walled off soon, and things will go downhill from that point.

In actuality, a good rule to follow will be not to mention the game, nor make any jokes about it to them, unless they actually instigate that kind of behavior. If they’re at all computer-literate, or know people who are, chances are they’ve heard it all already, over and over.

If their house is nicer than yours, then hang out there- if you share a meal and watch some TV with them, and they’re in a fairly good move, they might invite you to move in!