Howdy, Captain Obvious.
Come on, Eve, you’re going to make Lobsang jealous.
Yea, I think Eve is great, too. 
Well, Lobsang, my only advice is get thee off your duff and ask her out fercryinoutloud!
You looooooooove her.
[Beavis]
Heh, he said “Fantasize naked Scarlett Johansson orgasm bosums camel-toe.”
[/Beavis]
wHOA Whoa whoa whoa whoe. Clow down there big fella. Let’s not get ahead of ourselves. First. Does she drink?
Nah, this will be a lot more fun if he sublimates his true feelings, following her around like a lovestruck puppy, laughing just a little too loud at her witty comments, until the whole office, in fact the whole world, knows how he feels about her. Everyone but her, of course. So, when he does ask her out, but she has already given her soul over to a hunky stevedore, Nigel, she has no recourse but to crush his soul, the whole office can be entertained.
My plan has the advantage that we’ll get a number of interesting posts/ threads from it.
Does he have to be named Nigel?
Lobsang and OP-Girl sittin’ in a tree
K-I-S-S-I-N-G…
Sometimes, the third-grader response is the best.
Go yank her pigtails or something!
Anyway… must. return. to. fighting. urge. to. make. conversation.
Where to begin…
Obb-guy (remember him?) came in tonight as op-girl suspected he might. (he’s
sitting
a mere 3 meters away as I type). Op-girl immediately … must dash… tell yous
later.
This is way more fun than my unrequited lurve sagas ever were.
No, Pierce, Brock or similar names are acceptable alternatives.
*Anyway… must. return. to. fighting. urge. to. make. conversation.
Where to begin…
Obb-guy (remember him?) came in tonight as op-girl suspected he might. (he’s
sitting
a mere 3 meters away as I type). Op-girl immediately … must dash… tell yous
later.*
This is a side story to the whole me and her thing. (sharing because we’re still in MPSIMS, and it’s related to the cast of characters in the OP)
If I get sick of working with obb-guy tomorrow and I can drop a big enough hint to him that I don’t want to participate in his dull self-important conversation to make it stop I will give you the full story then. Right now it’s late and after work so I want to sumarize it as much as possible.
obb-guy came in, op-girl dashed out to make me and her a cuppa. I understood why she really left. I waited a minute or two and then started, politely “so, [obb-guy] what happened the other day? Apparently you agreed to cover a shift and then phoned up a mere 15 minutes before the shift started to say you don’t remember agreeing to this and refused to come in?” op-girl came back and one-against one became two-against one.
cue an hour long repeat of him squirming… not the slightest hint of remorse or sorrow, just arrogant face-saving.
it gets to the point where we all three realize that we’re not getting anywhere. some other guy turns up and offers op-girl a drink for 20 mins and obb-guy to cover. (feck, I have to spend 20 mins with asshole)
Nowww I remember where that post began!
Me and obb-guy alone. Him trying to make idle conversation as if nothing happened. me giving the shortest most poker-faced replies possible. Then I sit down to write this…no that post. Having not long ago seen all those extra replies to the thread.
Then op-girl returns from her break… post ends… submit is pressed. Server is down for maintenance until 1pm (or was it am?)
AHHHHH!
back button… post is still there. ::phew::
post gets saved using my online e-mail.
within seconds of op-girl returning obb-guy is gone… for the odd reason that the guy who invited op-girl out has … done the same to obb-guy (that guy is cleverer than I ever assumed him credit for)
So I’m alone with op-girl again. So we start gossiping about obb-guy and his assholishness and that he didn’t seem to be taking it like a man. (I think I love this girl. She hardly knows me and already we are like peas in a pod)
One of the things she says is “You know, I wouldn’t put it past him to be outside listening at the window”
Later on she takes a cigarette break. Not 2 seconds have passed since she leaves my site and she’s back…“he’s outside!” (ok, At this point I am sceptical, but give her the BotD)
She returns… with obb-guy.
(this is beginning to seem suspicious to me now as I recount it)
First thing I say to obb-guy (I think I suffered a tact-relapse or something) “Been listening in have we?”
Luckilly all concerned take this in the lightheartedest way.
Why is it that when I say I’m going to summarize something I end up rambling?
Beer is why.
Op-girl leaves the office to speak to someone upstairs so I am alone with obb-guy again…
We were having a conversation of sorts in which he blends an odd story about how he and his mother don’t get on into an explanation of his philosophy on people (after op-girl had left)…
treat people as they treat you
to which I disagreed and said treat people as you would have them treat you
(My personality is that you be nice to everyone indiscriminately, regardless of what you think of them. It’s a philosophy that has done me nothing but good in my life. Tonight I betrayed that philosophy and have got quite nasty with this guy)
during the conv about his mother (when op girl was still in the room) I refered to his type as a leach.
He took it well (He must be used to it)
“Peter, I’m learning that you have a way with words”
“[obb-guy] you inspire it in me”
(op-girl loved this reply)
While OP girl was out I built up (using great-boss as a topic of conversation) to this (as best I can remember it)
“And I am sorry to bring this up again, but an example of [great-boss]'s tolerance of people and unwillingness to raise his voice at anyone or get involved in the politics is the fact that I don’t think he will say anything about this. So I decided to give you a piece of my mind. I had seen how upset [op-girl] was because of this”
now this is the first and only moment this guy took something like a man.
Two memories I will take away from this night is the many deliberate eye-contacts between me and her while obb-guy was not looking and saying something idiotic, and how she moved herself within my sphere of comfort for much of the after-argument digs at obb-guy. Being uncomfortably close to her, all things consdered, was something to remember.
And I still don’t know: How I feel about her, how she feels about me. I suspect she has me filed in a folder with lots of male friends as ‘people I get on well with’
I have her filed under ‘people who’s mere presence in the room is very welcome’
That is quite possibly the longest post I have typed in three years, four months, and eleven-thousand three hundred and fourteen posts.
I like you. It’s because of your interest I’m updating this thread. I’d like to read about your unrequited lurve sagas… If you don’t mind me asking. If you do I’ll understand.
BTW on reading that mega-post I suspect I didn’t make obb-guy out to be the person who would deserve the nastiness we gave him. Well maybe I am wrong but the ommited details which I simply didn’t have time to include would justify the way we treated him.
Well, thank you. I’m trying to think of a good one at the moment. Perhaps the latest, which I am well over, though the thought of it still amuses me. It involves me (of course) and the object of the affection, a friend of mine who is now going to Bible college (which is the last place I would expect him to be, considering I don’t think many gay men go to Bible college).
She doesn’t wear cute-pyjamas, does she?
Don’t forget Neville.
No, no, no!!! Absolutely do not do this, it’s a dead giveaway, and such frank expressions of affection before you’ve even had your first date may frighten her away forever.
What you should do is punch her on the arm and then run back to your friends.
Well Lob? Does she drink? Ask her out to the pub already.
You’re in danger of crossing that line.
The one where she feels like she can trust you with anything and starts telling you things about her life that concern her, and she’ll come to you when she needs a shoulder to cry on.
The line into … the FRIEND zone. Her panties will sport a big red circle with a slash across it for you afterwards.