My proposal for Olympic broadcasts.

Along the lines of “Well, if I were president, I’d like to share what I would do if I were in charge of NBC sports……………….

<Note: I’m in MN so all times will be couched in CST.>
<Note: I am picking and choosing my favorite sport. Please insert your own personal favorites in place of my personal favorites.>

{In the voice of whomever is in charge……}

I know that many of our viewers are aware of the results of all Olympic events. Due to the preponderance of results showing up on the internet and in radio broadcasts, I would like to announce the following alterations to NBC Olympic broadcasts:

[ul][list][list][li]First of all, we are going to begin announcing, at the top of our broadcasts, the medal winners in each sport that competed since our last broadcast.[/li]
[li]Our broadcasts will no longer pretend that the Games are occurring live.[/li]
[li]Most importantly, we will no longer interrupt an interesting and important airing of, for example, a volleyball match, with updates on water polo. What follows is an example of our proposed format:[/li]
[list][li]Equestrian cross-country rules and regulations, 6:00 to 6:05.[/li][li]Highlights of equestrian cross-country, 6:05 to 6:45.[/li][li]Eqestrian cross-country glurge 6:45 to 6:50.[/li][li]Low-lights of equestrian cross-country 6:50 to 6:55.[/li][li]Results of equestrian cross-country, 6:55 to 7:00.[/ul][/li]
[ul][li]Gymnastic rules and regulations, 7:00 to 7:10 {gymnastic rules cover several skills on several events, ergo the longer time period}[/li][li]Highlights of gymnastic events, 7:10 to 7:45.[/li][li]Lowlights of gymnastics, 7:45 to 7:50.[/li][li]Gymnastic glurge, 7:50 to 7:55.[/li][li]Results of gymnastic events, 7:55 to 8:00.[/ul][/li]
[ul][li]Bicycling rules and regulations, 8:00 to 8:05[/li][li]Highlights of bicycling event, 8:05 to 8:20[/li][li]Lowlights of bicycling event, 8:20-8:25[/li][li]Results of bicycling event, 8:25-8:30[/ul][/li]
[ul][li]Diving rules and regulations, 8:30 to 8:35[/li][li]Highlights of diving event, 8:35 to 8:50[/li][li]Lowlights of diving event, 8:50 to 8:55[/li][li]Results of diving event, 8:55 to 9:00[/ul][/li]

The purpose of this scenario is to allow American fans, of all sports, to properly set the timers of their VCRs to tape only the sports they give a shit about.

All in favor, say “Aye!!!”. All opposed say “Nay!!!”, and give their reasons.

Lastly, I should state that while I started writing this thread a long time ago, I’m really drunk right now and it might not make sense.


I like that. :slight_smile:

I say email your suggestions to NBC. Not that they’d take you too seriously, but maybe they’ll get an idea pounded into their head if enough people write complaining about how cartoonish their coverage is.

I had the email address if you’d like it. :wink:

one addendum: all swimming and diving events will be performed butt naked (well at least the wimmen) :stuck_out_tongue:

Anyone who can get drunk and spell ‘preponderance’ correctly gets my vote. “AYE”