So, I dated this girl in highschool for a few months. She turned out to be a bit odd, and we didn’t really “click”. We went our separate ways.
A few years after graduation, I see her unexpectedly. She’s married and has a kid. When we’re talking, she’s behaving as if we’re still going out though. It’s a bit creepy, but I don’t see any harm. Then she starts showing up at random places–and is always overly friendly. This goes on for a few years, then I get a better job and move away. She (thankfully) doesn’t follow.
Then, today, I got a (really) late Valentine’s Day card in the mail. Not a lovey-dovey one, just a friendly one, like one would send to a sibling. It’s really strange.
You really have not given any evidence of real stalker type behavior in your OP unless the chance meetings were really (you didn’t say) her lying in wait for you. On the stalker dial what you’ve described might be characterized as her still a bit in love with you, but I’d hesitate to characterize a woman’s “friend” type valentine as “stalking” unless she takes it to a more aggressive level.
I had a stalker in college. You know the difference, believe me, even if it’s on-the-surface innocent looking. It was college, right? You’re bound to run into the same people. Well no, ever semester he was outside of classes I was coming out of. Also there’s the part about him showing up at my parents’ door at 8 pm on Christmas eve, an hour away from school. For two or three years. He was harmless, I think. Mostly just lonely.
This is the part I’d like to see explained more. Was there touching, hand-holding, etc.? Or does this refer to things she said? If so, what did she say?
I’ve only had stalkers online, followed me on every single post, followed me to other boards. Really hateful guy, I’ve met him in person at a board event, he knows where I live… very creepy.
My first girlfriend in HS stalked me after dumping me. Found this out 20 years after the fact. She told me that she would drive past my house even though it was out of the way. This continued even after I went away to college. It doesn’t bother me since she seems to be an innocent type of crazy. And lives many states away, now.
Well, like the tone of her voice, and saying things like, “We should do dinner some-time”* and yes, she kept rubbing my shoulder. Hard to describe, really–just a funny vibe.
I had a former girlfriend like that. When I broke up with her in high school, she ended up in a psychiatric hospital for a few weeks. 21 years later, she found me on-line, and we IM’d frequently for about two weeks. I backed off of that because she talked about things in the past as if they had happened just a few weeks ago and kept trying to get me to say I was still crazy for her. She never accepted that I had broken up with her long ago, and she carried a torch for me for all of those years. She got ugly with me when I told her that our respective marriages were more important than trying to recreate “us.” She has since had lunch with me once (not something I want to repeat) and sent me a friend request on Facebook. It hasn’t been stalking so much as a pitiful avoidance of reality and perpetuating a fantasy.
