So I’ve been looking to move for a while now, but because I don’t have very much money (student loans can be absolutely crippling), because I don’t have a car (there’re those student loans again), and because I don’t have, y’know, someone to be looking with, my choices are fairly limited even before my own preferences are brought into play. One-bedroom apartments (and most Metro-accessible studios) are right out, and if I’d like to maintain some modicum of the space and privacy I have now, my best bet is to find another basement bedroom in a house shared by not too many other people, or something similar. All I ask is that (a) the bedroom I eventually find is moderately less awful than the bedroom I have now; (b) the roommates I eventually find are moderately less noisy and discomfiting than the roommates I have now; © the utility bill is moderately less than the utilities I pay for now (which are ridiculous, as a consequence of my roommates paying for premium channels I never use and leaving lights and TVs on at all hours of the day and night); (d) the place I eventually find is within moderate walking distance of a grocery store and a Metro station, in a neighborhood that doesn’t leave me fearing for my life; and (e) said Metro station is not, if it can at all be avoided, ridiculously far from, like, everything.
Modest criteria, I hope you’ll agree. As I think I’ve said about my career path, I don’t care what I’m doing as long as I feel like I’m moving forward. It’s the same thing with housing – I don’t have the cash to make this next place the place I want to spend my life in; all I ask is that I end up somewhere better than I am now.
But the times I’ve looked for places – and, having a little breathing room at work for the first time in months, I’m looking again now – I’ve found almost nothing that fits my tastes. And the places I do find are predictably those for which there is the most demand. What’s more – and this is the reason for this post – I don’t feel, for whatever reason, that I’m a particularly attractive or arresting prospective roommate. That is, when I go see a place I like, I’m charming and relaxed and personable and so forth…but I don’t think I make much of an impression. My interesting-clean-and-responsible-person-who-anybody-would-love-to-share-living-space-with vibe doesn’t quite come across. Or doesn’t seem to, at any rate. When I’m visiting the places I don’t get the sense that the interest is mutual – and not hearing anything after I leave tends to confirm that.
Take today. I went to an open house about half a mile away from where I live right now, between two Metros and right next to a grocery store. The place was great…about what I’m paying right now, and much nicer. The roommate who’s leaving has a bathroom, living room, and bedroom on the basement level. One of the roommates who’s staying is from Oregon (which is where I’m from); another’s a lawyer (which is what I do). Both seem very nice. Both are female, so they might not be looking for a male, but they didn’t indicate that that would be a dispositive issue (and I prefer living with women anyway). I talked to both of them for a little bit and felt I came across well enough, but there were a number of other people (almost all women) who were there for the open house, and there was obviously a great deal of interest in the rooms. Understandably, then, neither of the roommates I talked to (nor the outgoing roommate, who was also talking to people) spared a whole lot of time for me. And I dutifully put my name and contact information down on their notepad and indicated that I was very interested, and they said thanks and that they’d let me know, and I left. And I’d be shocked if I heard from them again. And I don’t know what I could/should have done differently to change that. Probably nothing, or nothing concrete.
So the bottom line is this: It’s discouraging that when I find a housing situation that I like (which is hard enough in its own right), the occupants don’t seem sufficiently to like me. I’m assuming I should just keep plugging away. But maybe there’s something I’m doing wrong, and I should somehow change my approach. And maybe I should accept that my own limitations mean I should lower my standards to begin with, and to be happy with the kind of place that I’m likely to be able to get without overmuch hassle. What do y’all think?
No, this post is not an allegory. Not only an allegory, anyway.
