…and she says she never wins anything.
In yesterday’s mail came a classy envelope addressed to her. Enclosed was a nice letter, and on top in bold letters was the following exciting message,
“WIN A Pre-paid Cremation!”
It did not specify whether she had to be dead first.
She decided not to pursue it.
Yeah, them scamsters - they’ll burn ya! 
Good god. That’s worse that getting that first AARP stuff in the mail. For those not in USA, the AARP stands for the American Association of Retired Persons (or People–don’t remember). They start trolling at about age 40. Very depressing.
I’m interested in the mind set that thinks a pre-paid cremation is a prize. Can you imagine the marketing meeting?
“I know! Let’s give away some cremations! That’ll make 'em sit up and take notice! This could be our big break!”