My wife just wrecked a couple more cars

yeah…that makes 4 in 11 months.

December 27, 2004–slid on ice into curb. Curtains for the 1989 Camry.
January 8, 2005–slid on snow into parked van–totalled the van
Today changed lanes into an adjacent car. Shared the pee out of a newly licensed 16 year old kid and totalled both cars.

The punchline? I work in the total loss department of the company that insures her! These claims ALL come through my shop. So my friends & bosses all know my business. :smack:

She’s a goddam menace! Of course, this is a blessing in disguise. She wrecked the Pathfinder. It’s a gas-guzzling 4x4 and I’ve been wondering how we were going to get rid of it in this economy. I’m gonna get her a 85 Subaru wagon–no way does she get to cruise my fly whip anymore!

That’s pretty scary. Maybe she should pay more attention/ be more cautious? She is endangering herself and others around her.

I am terrified of getting in a car accident - I was in one with a friend and luckily escaped with only black and blue knees, and him a small cut on his neck from the airbag.

It puts me in mind of a Seattle afternoon radio talk show on bad driving I heard years ago.

A woman had called in to say that it took her four totalled cars (all rear-end collisions, all her fault) before she came to the conclusion that it was her tailgating that was the problem and not how other people were driving badly around her.

Say, me Jeep doesn’t get very good mileage… :wink:

(Just kidding. I need the cargo capacity.)

Well, no wonder she’s wrecking cars. She’s obviously a pervert!

:smiley:

:smack:

So, ah…

Do you guys have sex after she wrecks a car? Does she like David Cronenberg films?

:smiley:

Two words for you, dude: bus pass.

Out of curiosity, does she consider the accidents to be her fault, or is it all because of “other people”?

I can’t get enough of Videodrome (well, ok, Debbie Harry before she bloated) and Dead Ringers never fails to … stir … me.

But as for the sex thing…well, she usually gets some after she wrecks a car. Hm, it has been a while. Think I’ll run across the street to the liquor store and try my luck with her a little later on tonight. :smiley:

As a motorcyclist who could have very well been riding in the lane next to your wife instead of the 16 year old, I would like to politely ask your wife to please get off the road. Ride the bus or take cabs - the inconvenience might well save my life, or the life of someone else.

Contrary to popular belief, there’s no social stigma attached to using the mass transit system. In fact, it makes you a lot smarter than most. (Particularly motorcyclists. :smiley: )

And Sublight, she knows she’s a spaz. She’s brilliant, but not a very good driver I’m afraid, and she accepts that.

[QUOTE=Leviosaurus]
As a motorcyclist who could have very well been riding in the lane next to your wife instead of the 16 year old, I would like to politely ask your wife to please get off the road. Ride the bus or take cabs - the inconvenience might well save my life, or the life of someone else. [/. QUOTE]You lucky, lucky bastard. She used to live in Bellevue…she was actually a delivery driver there for a few years :eek: if you can imaginate that. She’s in Denver now. Studying to be…wait for it…a nurse. Presumably she’ll be able to help traffic victims with some haste.

But what about [Crash?

Sorry Johnny, your sly wit was wasted on me. I just don’t get out much. I…I’m afraid to drive. Sometimes.

Here you are, then. :wink:

I was going to say the same thing, but I’m not nearly as polite as you, and since this isn’t the pit, I just shut up.

Cars are replaceable. How long till she kills someone? I’ll second the “bus pass” idea. :rolleyes:

And yet somehow, the thought that I may yet be sharing the road with your wife causes me to not feel particularly lucky :wink:

Seriously, that explains a lot. Seattle drivers are the worst I’ve ever seen when it comes to ignoring (or being entirely oblivious to) all the cars around them. When I lived in Chicago, it seemed like all the drivers were actively trying to kill me, but at least they paid attention. I actually felt safer on the Dan Ryan in rush hour than I do in Bellevue, and that’s not a statement that I would ever make lightly.

Dropping a born-and-raised Seattle driver onto any other metropolitan freeway is like dropping a puppy into a trout pond. It’ll swim its way around all right, but that don’t make it a fish.

Well, accepts it except to the extent of forgoing driving.

No offense intended but, there are some people who are too easily distracted or startled to drive a car. I know a couple of people who have similar track records to you wife. One is a 23 year old who has totaled 4 cars already. Each time because he was not paying attention to what was going on around him. The other one has totaled 9 cars in the last 20 years. His problem is more about just being reckless and driving too fast and stupidly. It doesn’t sound like that is your wife’s problem, but then you would know better than we would.

And no, I won’t let any of them drive me anywhere.