I am no expert, but I find Lone Star palatable. It’s pretty light, but it’s a step up from water.
Hell of a lot better than Pearl. You could leave Pearl in a refrigerator at a frat house and not worry about any of it going missing. But if you’re constipated, and need a good cleaning out, a couple of Pearls will do the trick for you in short order.
Just got back from a resort in Mexico where all they served was Corona (all inclusive). It is awful, awful beer that seems to taste entirely of witches brew. I drank A LOT of mixed drinks instead.
That’s quite a moment in marketing there. Can I get a bottle of Hitler to go with it?
Worst stuff I ever had:
Old Style. I remember the commercials with Dennis Farina as a cop (which he was at one time) on stakeout to catch evildoers attempting to steal Old Style from Chicago. I’d have been helping them load the damn truck. Just nasty, cheap beer, the kind that gives you a headache at the first sip.
Nameless brand on tap at the bars in Champaign IL during summer - they had nickel beer nights sometimes (late 1980s-early 1990s). Slogan should have been “Bring a buck, get f’d up”.
In my younger days, my friends and I were not particular about what we drank. The cheaper the better. I’ve been through many beers already mentioned in this thread, but nothing, and I mean NOTHING, was worse than a beer called Stegmaier. It was only sold in loose cases, no 6-packs. It was $4.99 a case back in the early-mid 80s. Our local beer store only kept it warm, it wouldn’t waste cooler space on it, so we always had to plan ahead. It was vile. It was sold in squat, brown bottles, often dented, and occasionally with an upside-down label.
Never mind
How much did the drinks cost? That may have been the plan.
http://lost.wikia.com/wiki/DHARMA_Beer
Iron City is better than Dharma Beer!
When I lived in Phoenix there was a bar that had about 50 specialty/import beers. I was able to at least finish all of them except for Maui Lager. After a couple sips I had to order a glass of bourbon to get the taste out of my mouth. The bartender said it was the only time he had ever seen anyone order staight bourbon to wash down a beer.
Beira Peroni. Thirty years later, Giant Freakin Marine still shudders at the memory, and has been known to drink Pearl.
Me? Probably Coors. Rocky Mountain Piss Water, and I’m a fourth generation Colorado native. That shit be nasty.
It was actually Goebel, the NTPTSIBTPTPONOI* brand of Stroh Brewing. (U of Michigan alum here, and consumer of much cheap - and not-cheap - beer during those years.)
Just as bad was Wiedemann, sold only in 24-bottle flats. We called it Waterman or Peedemann.
*Not Too Proud To Sell It But Too Proud To Put Our Name On It
I consider myself a bit of a connoisseur of really cheap, nasty beer. My dad’s favorite beer was Olympia (with salt) so I learned early from the best. I spent many a summer drinking and enjoying Shaeffer warm from the trunk of a car. I’ve enjoyed Schmitt, Hamms, Balantine, Buckhorn, and many others I’ll never remember. But I met my match when a friend and I picked up a twelver of the beer that sounds like it makes you feel: Blatz. Good god, it was bad. We could barely finish it. But we did.
Is Zima disqualified, or does it win the thread?
My brother threw a blasphemy party one year, and among my nefarious contributions was a six-pack of Zima (I think I labeled it “The Saliva of Christ” or something). Have you ever smelled the water in a vase that has had flowers in it too long? Zima tasted like that smells, plus sugar.
Daniel
Sounds like both of you and I were running around the same circles back then in Charm City.
In the mid 70’s, Natty Boh had a jingle that played incessantly about 15 times every Orioles game on the radio :
*National beer,
National beer,
You’ll like the taste of
National beer.
It’s from the Land of Pleasant Living
We bring you National beer.
*
I got a hard lesson in truth in advertising upon relying that as a reason to go to Baltimore to college. I was surely the first in my class to land in the emergency room drunk, and I was very underage - drinking age still 18 at the time too. Drank a National beer every inning when the jingle came on, at the game itself, and I was halfway to the hospital already.
They were waiting for me at the infirmary the next day - the brand new young nurse in charge told me herself. I was her first case. Wonder what ever happened to her, her kindness was wasted on the young, but that was a long time ago now.
Now that you mention it, I don’t think I’ve ever seen Corona on tap.
I remember driving across the border to get Carta Blanca in short stubby brown bottles years ago. The thing I remember most was that the bottom of the bottle had a depression that fit the cap, so you could use the bottom of one bottle to twist off the top of another. That was so impressive I had to open all of the bottles that day.
I can drink really cheap beer and enjoy the hell out of it if it’s cold enough and the day is really hot. I consider stuff like Blatz and Hudepohl* as ballpark beers. They’re perfect for sitting in the sun during a double-header. Of course a decent beer would taste great too but I think there is a small but vital niche for unpretentious crap.
So I’m not a beer snob, okay?
There is only one beer I ever tried but couldn’t finish the bottle even to be polite: Blue Moon. I don’t care much for flavored beers, e.g pumpkin ales, etc. They’re okay but taste too tarted up for me. A lemon slice with a wheat beer is delightful so citrus accents aren’t out of the question. But the murky, sweetish Blue Moon orange/coriander dreck is jarringly unpleasant. It tastes like a rotted soft drink. Brrrrrrr.
The ballpark cry of my youth: “Hudy! Getcher HUDY here! Let me get to ya before the sun does!”
O’Keefe’s Old Vienna lager beer.
We weren’t terribly discriminating back when I was 18, but after trying a case of Old Vienna, my friends and I agreed we’d never drink this swill again. We weren’t exactly sure how anybody else could either. I don’t know if they make it any more, but if they don’t, I wouldn’t be surprised.
That seems to be a characteristic of Mexican stubbies. I remember drinking cases of Tres Equis in that kind of bottle during my sailing days.
Another nominee that only Alaskans will know about: Meister Brau. The first attempt to brew in The Great Land, back in the late 70s. Total moose-piss.
It was all inclusive so nada. My suspicion is that Corona has a contract with the resort.
Red Stripe. No contest. I’ve been to Jamaica twice, and had to put up with this swill. Thank Og for rum.
Motts applejuice fermented with Fleiscmenns yeast. I figured it was so easy, how could I not try it? I just popped the top, threw in the yeast and added the airlock. After all, the stuff was pastuerized. I have yet to find a use for carbonated apple vinegar.
Yea, try and get grosser than that!