Nation's Hamburgers is celebrating their 100th anniversary!

…a bit early. Like, 48 years early. See, they’ve printed it on all their take out bags, because they’re so excited they jumped the gun. Who the hell thought of this dumbass scheme?

Who are they, and where can we read a story about it?

Nation’s Giant Hamburgers

The site says they’re the best since 1952, and I don’t see any mention on the home page of an anniversary of any kind.

I’ll keep looking though. With this insomnia, I’ve nothing better to do.

Well if [url=http://www.nationsrestaurants.com/index.htmlthis is their website, they don’t say anything about having a 100th birthday…

And apparently they don’t have any restaurants within 2000 miles of me…

Damn…
http://www.nationsrestaurants.com/index.html

It was printed on the bag. I suppose I can scan it for you guys, if it’s not totally disgusting already.

Obviously this bag is some sort of artifact from the future, accidentally sent here by some junior high school student doing a science experiment for extra credit. Don’t scan it! You may disrupt the electron arrangement, thereby trapping the bag in this time period forever and causing terrible harm to the space-time continuum!

NASA must be informed of this.

See they could be 100 years old. They have been the best since 1952. They were serving crap on a bun for the previous 48 years.

Well, I wouldn’t want to disrupt the timeline. That, and it’s at the bottom of the kitchen trash can. It must have a tracking nanochip embedded in it, so they can dig it out of the landfill in 2052.

The hamburger was invented in 1904, according to one of many stories.

When I lived in the Bay Area, we called it Rations because someone misread the sign the first time they saw it. We loved their pies, and their hamburgers were decent but not exceptional. We liked that the kitchen was open and you could see them cook your burger right then and there. We were semi-regulars.

Also from that time, a funny story…

I had lived the first 20 years of my life in Los Angeles, and seeing famous people in various places around town was just kind of a part of life. One day, I was riding the bus, close to home, and I saw someone who looked familiar walking down the sidewalk. I was sure I had seen them somewhere on TV, or in a commercial, or something. I racked my brain for two days, trying to remember where the heck I had seen this guy before. One evening, the answer came to me in unexpected fashion. There he was, in the Nation’s kitchen. He was the burger flipper!

I agree, it’s just that I was in the mood for a good burger and Nation’s was right in front of me. There’s no Fuddrucker’s or In-N-Out right near my house, although there is a good local chain called Sam’s Super Burgers.

Gotta say, though, that this is pretty good advertising.

It has you talking about it, and spreading the word of their restaurant worldwide on a message board.

Yeah, I guess we’re all helpless before the power of the meme.

To mark this memorable anniversary, how about we hold a minutes flatulance this Sunday at noon?

Bolding is mine. You better retrieve it and smash the chip. If you don’t we’ll get Terminators and Machines and stuff (nod self).

It takes a special kind of asshole to fart for a full minute.

Yeah, I’m gonna hail a cab right now and ride 4,000 miles across the continent to get me one of those Nation hamburgers. Everything on, hold the pickle.

Nation’s burgers are awesome. I used to work at Nation’s, but my boss was a bitch on wheels, so I quit. We always just called it Giant Burgers; nobody actually used the name Nation’s in casual conversation.

Around here there’s a competitor called 1/4 Lb. Giant Burgers, so people call that one Giant Burgers and Nation’s gets called, uh, I forgot.