Every year I go to a music festival with my sis and a group of friends. We stay in motor homes / tents in a large field. For the last 8 years the event sponsors have had a contest for the campers, usually based on a song from the headliner or whatever strikes the judges fancy.
This year - no official theme. “Some people” complained about the small site winners a few years ago. The powers that be disbanded the official contest, but said if the site is “done up” there will be unofficial prizes.
At the last minute - okay 10 minutes ago - we changed our theme. We now want to do “Trailer Park Chic”, because what’s more chic than 2000 RV’s full of drunk Minnesotan rednecks?
We’ve got the flamingos. We have the picket fence. We have the mannequin who will be preggers in short shorts and curlers in her hair… And we have two big ol’ motor homes (sans cinderblocks), a deck off one of the motorhomes and a tent/gazebo thingy. Area size is about 30’ x 20’.
You need the following album: Rev It Up With Taz. The song “White Trash” could be your theme song.
Also:
a car up on blocks
random motorcycles (choppers, baby)
a pit bull with a spiked collar on a chain
laundry line hung with wife beaters, bowling shirts and slutty underwear
Wal-mart bags conspicuously placed
You have GOT to have a fake planter to place around the tongue of the trailer (only works with bumper-tows, not with fifth-wheels). Be sure to put faded, frazzled old fake flowers in it. Oh, and skirting – some of that wavy plastic stuff, but be sure to leave one or two pieces off for “ventilation.” And if you find a rusted old Plymouth to put on blocks, that’d be great.
Oh it will - we needs to eat! I did talk the main griller to leave venison and elk off the menu. Ugh.
Is it sad that my sister has, at her disposal:
Four strings of old big Xmas lights
A mess of plastic flowers
WalMart bags
Ticky tacky bowling shirts
An empty keg
and NASCAR flags.
Can’t you make planters out of old tires and paint them pink or aqua?
How about the astroturf lawn?
And how many windchimes made out of spoons/flattened beer cans do you have?
Lute Skywatcher, I can’t decide if your link made me homesick, or made me want to never return!
The key to good trailer trash chic isn’t what you have, it’s how much of it you have. I can’t emphasize the clutter enough. In my old neighborhood, we had some rednecks move in, and their first action of the day was to fill the backyard with tons of those old playschool jungle gyms. More than I thought possible. Then an above ground swimming pool. Then a trampoline. Then an old metal swingset. Then several riding lawnmowers. Then several cars on blocks. Remember… quantity, not quality!
Well the first two will be no problem. That’s usually how we are up there. Three days away from kids, jobs, critters… We should probably leave the Scrabble playing indoors though, I’m thinking.
Ummm… we do that also. Which, for me is weird, as I am NOT a social person. However, my best buddy’s hubby is always yakking to anyone and inviting people over that I end up kinda forced to be. Oh, and there’s alcohol. Last year we ran an impromptu barter store. My job is treats. I bring lotsa of desserts. The buddy’s hubby started telling passerbys that in exchange for (beer, plate of ribs, other R rated drunk based exhibitions) they could have a sweet. It was… interesting. So, yeah. There will be hollerin’.
Gretchen Wilson is one of the performers!
No dogs in the campgrounds. BUT based on Ghanima upthread I have located a 4’ stuffed dog that will be chained up.
If you need to serve food, start here and be sure to scroll down to see the other books – I see some with “Trailer Park” in the titles, though I am not personally familiar with them.
Y’all need velvet artwork. Like a velvet Elvis, or the dogs playing poker, or (I only saw this once, so it might be an original) the velvet pig playing an accordion. That was… well, I don’t really have words for it. I understand it cost $0.63 at the Goodwill store.
Another Hillbilly Hellcats fan? On the Straight Dope, of all places? I never would have believed it! I’ve seen them twice live over the years – great rockabilly band.
Southern Culture on the Skids has some good songs to add to your soundtrack… like Put Your Teeth up on the Windowsill.
If you see an abandoned toilet on the side of the road, pick that up. Random cinder blocks won’t hurt, even if you don’t tow an old abandoned car to put up on them.
American flags are good, but rebel flags are better.
For the sake of authenticity, at least one member of your party should wear a mullet or a rattail. Extra points if a girl does it. Double plus extra points if you bleach your hair but leave the roots dark, or dye it some garishly artificial shade of red. The last pic at the bottom of this page should give you some inspiration.
Rosie the mannequin will be attired in a purple and black leopard skin cami with a lovely housecoat overtop. She will be two pillows pregnant. Hair in curlers, baby in arms (if we have time to make the arms!). Slim, which previously was simply one of those goofy 1" thick plywood cutouts has been replaced by Al. Al will be under one of the motor homes, car parts and beercans at hand. I picked up a few ratty lawn chairs. Lots of ugly silk flowers and goofy pots to put them in. We have the WalMart picket fence and a (soon to be) beat to hell mailbox. We should have a tire planter also, but may have to paint it there.
We debated about strewing toilets around, BUT then considered we have a hard enough time convincing people not to pee in our campsite anyways. We don’t want to really give them fodder.
Sis couldn’t find her NASCAR flag, so instead we bought some lovely NASCAR fabric (only .70C/yard!!) for table cloths.
The clothesline is going to be the best. We found some of the most hideous WalMart type clothes to put up it ain’t funny.
