My father passed away in August after battling lung cancer. He was 70.
My sister was staying with him, to help him out with daily needs and such-he had no other place to live, otherwise.
My father named her executrix of the will. The will states that his estate is to be sold and the proceeds split between us, the only two children he had (that we know of.)
I asked my sister about his arrangements while we were on his deathwatch. She was very evasive about the location of the will, would not let me see his financial records, and gave everyone who came to see him a hard time (suspicious of them taking any of his stuff.)
I confronted her about cleaning out his bank accounts, and she threw me out of the house and called the police; after she told her story they called me and asked me to stay away from her or risk arrest. So I didn’t attend the funeral.
Finally, her son called me tonight. The $12000 cash she got out of the accounts is gone; she thinks she owns the house and that as the executrix of the will she decides what happens to his house and the rest of his stuff.
I contacted several attorneys at the time of the funeral; I couldn’t do anything without a copy of the will, which i needed a death certificate to obtain. They didn’t sound too interested in the case at the time.
I have been torn between dropping the matter altogether, or pursuing it. I’m not a rich man, and half the money from a house is just what I need right now. She would still have her fair share, enough to arrange her own place to live.
Her son tells me that she moved other people into the house, and she is still keeping the utilities in my father’s name.
What I need to know are my rights and what I can do to get her to follow the will he made. I also need to know if I’m doing the right thing; even though she hates me and always has, she’s still blood.
Oh, what a terrible situation. I’m really sorry to hear that your sister is being this way.
I have worked in probate and I do have my law degree, but I’m sorry to say that I’m not sure how you should proceed on this. I usually deal with wills that have gone through probate, not wills that are being disputed without probate.
What I feel that you should do is try to find the attorneys who drew up his will, because they will have a copy of it. Once you get a copy you should be able to go on from there. Probably the attorneys that made the will will be more than happy to assist you, because they have the evidence of the will being drawn up.
Unless his will was drafted by your father, there should be evidence of the will tucked away in a file in an office somewhere. If you don’t know who his lawyers were, try calling around to the lawyers in the area.
I’m really sorry this happened to you. Money makes people really vicious and stupid, as I know from first hand experience. Nevertheless, if what you say is true, then you do own half of that house and you should be able to acquire it or sue your sister for damages.
Please keep trying! I personally dislike people who are greedy and take advantage of death to make themselves richer.
One moment, I am reading through your post again and will give as much help as I can.
I cannot offer you any legal help, but from your post it sounds to me like your sister has a problem. Drugs, credit debt, I don’t know, but being that secretive about the will and the disappearing money are BAD signs. I would follow the advise of the above poster and obtain a copy of the will posthaste. NOW. As soon as you have that, go directly to the police station and show them that you the right to half the estate and the right to be present in the home etc. The fact that she made you miss the funeral is appalling. If you truly need the money, then I suggest you nail her to the wall and do it fast. If not, I would consider dissolving ties with her, as she has shown herself to be rather uncaring.
How do you know that? Even if it was that way years ago, there’s a decent chance that your sister asked your father to change it and make her sole heir.
Oh come on. If you had been willing to put up a few thousand dollars as a retainer, those attorneys would have been plenty interested in helping you.
Anyway, I would imagine that to get the house put in her own name, your sister would have to file some sort of proceeding in probate court and presumably the will would be part of that filing. I’m just speculating, here, but I would consider stopping by the probate court and asking to review the file.
Or better yet, pony up and hire an attorney. Your local bar association probably has a program which gets you a half hour consultation with a lawyer for a nominal amount of money.
I don’t think there are enough facts here to answer that question. I’m guessing that you have spun the facts pretty aggressively in your favor. Probably your sister would say that you are a shiftless a**h**** who completely ignored your father while she cared for him, day and night for years, and that you only swooped in at the last minute because you saw some dollar signs and the opportunity to muscle in on some fast cash to feed your addictions.
But anyway, is your sister married? Does she have a decent-paying job? Is she over the age of 35? If she is unmarried, without a decent-paying job, and without decent prospects for marriage, I would probably just let it go.
Wow, sounds like you already started out with bad blood. I know your sister was being unreasonable, but I really wish you hadn’t confronted her with this. It’s going to make things a lot harder for you, since you’ve already set her up as your adversary.
Also, it would have been a lot better had you not let matters cool for four months before seriously thinking about your rights. You’ve let her have her head, and she’s messed things up royally, and it’s going to take a lot more time to fix. Wrapping up financial affairs can take years, and if she has spent money owed you already then you are going to have to get it from her and it’s going to take a lot more time and effort than it would have been. You have to decide now whether it’s worth it to you.
No…she doesn’t. The will decides where and what things are passed on. As an executrix she can only carry out what the will says to do, and she gets reasonable expenses for this – reasonable expenses being costs directly stemming from her actions carrying out the will, not costs like loss of earnings on her part or costs associated with caring for your father before his death.
The will also takes effect at the time of death. You will need to find out his financial matters at the time of death, and your inheritance is set at that date, so half of that money belongs to you. Now, as I said before, time has not been on your side and your sister has already spent your money, and you will have to get it back from her, which will be a struggle.
You can probably get a death certificate pretty easily, as you are his son. I’m fuzzy on this, but you should be able to get it from the hospital he died in, or the coroner’s or something.
Also, as stated in my earlier post, you should be able to get a copy of the will from the lawyers, as you are a beneficiary.
As a matter of fairness, I would say that you should pursue this. Half of it does belong to you and she has been acting unethically and you can possibly have her removed as executrix and have a probate judge manage it instead…I’m not sure about this either but the lawyers will be able to point you in the right direction.
One thing I will say is that if the lawyers sense that you are ambivalent about pursuing it they will not take the initiative. You need to instruct them what to do every step of the way, without being a pest about it please
About the utilities, have you considered calling the power companies? I don’t think you will be able to get much done, but informing them that your father has died might get the ball rolling – although they might require the death certificate. This might piss your sister off though, and if you don’t want more bad blood you should consider this.
Your rights as beneficiary are that you can enforce the will. You also are entitled to your share as set out in the will, from the date of death. That probably means that you can get the house sold and get the money back from your sister. This may mean removing your sister as executrix and having the will administered by the court, but you should talk to the attorneys.
I think you’re doing the right thing. Your father wanted his estate divided in a certain way, and you should give effect to his wishes. That’s why we have wills and other instruments to divide estates. He had the right to decide who got his assets, and it’s not right to deprive him of that.
I’m not a member of the bar, and I don’t know PA law, so please do not rely on this. You really should try to find the lawyers who made his will and go from there.
To clarify; I obtained a death certificate through the funeral director, and I have a copy of his filed will, directly from his attorney’s office. The attorney didn’t seem very interested; he told me I would have to wait.
The cash assets would have been nice; but the (paid for) house is the whole sticking point.
brazil84, you are right about what she would call me. She is 44, divorced, and has poor health, and her SSI check is sent to a government agency to pay her bills before she even sees it, due to her incompetence. She’s had several court judgements against her because she never pays her bills.
And, my wife reminded me that my father intended for me to have half of everything- he insisted right up to the end. He wanted me to make sure that she was taken care of, and he knew if she got her hands on everything it would be gone in a flash.
Why I waited so long? Mainly my procrastination tendencies about unpleasant tasks.
So, it’s time to call an attorney. Any recommendations for the Pittsburgh area?
If that’s the situation, then it shouldn’t be too hard to get your half; put the money in trust for her; and then wash your hands of your sister. But you still need a lawyer.
It’s a bit puzzling why you mentioned your own financial needs, though. If your father wanted you to hold your share for your sisters benefits, the standup thing to do is to honor that request. No doubt you will get a lot of flak from your wife for it.
I am sorry to hear about your father, and your current problems with your sister. To answer your question, whether you should pursue it: Only if you respect your father’s wishes, which he told you about and which he put in his will.
Go talk to the people at your county’s probate court. They see this stuff every day. They will probably give you a list of the items that need to be accomplished and the deadlines by which they are due. The executrix must be approved by the probate court, but even though she is named by the will, if you have valid reasons to object to her serving, the court will have to take a closer look at things. As the executrix, she has a fiduciary duty to the heirs and must account for any and all disbursements of the estate’s assets, including cash. You may need to consult an attorney experienced in probate matters, but your first stop should be the probate court. They’ll help you get started in your investigation. Most probate courts also allow interested parties to request to be sent a copy of the executrix’s accounting reports and other filings.
Don’t write off the cash she spent. You know she has at least half a house in real assets from which you can be repaid if it is determined she owes you money.
Good luck.
Caveat: IAAL, but I am not your lawyer and this is not legal advice. I do not know you and do not represent you. I am probably not even licensed in your state to practice law and don’t even know what your state is. This is just common sense advice from a complete and total stranger.
I concur with those who have said to go to the probate court. Two of my brothers handled my mother’s estate (also in PA) and they had to file some legal paperwork to be legally declared executors. My suspicion is that your sister has not yet done so.
If the executor of the will is demonstrably not acting in good faith, the other beneficiaries of the will can file an appeal through the courts. My third brother attempted to enlist my support for his doing this (I did not. The third brother… is not a trustworthy person and would have done what he could to see that the rest of us did not get what my mother intended).
One thing you did not comment on: if your sister is on public assistance of any kind, the inheritance will jeopardize that until such time as the inheritance is spent down. I’m not an expert in that area, but we received advice on how to set up a trust for my son (with whatever we might leave behind when we go) to preserve his possible access to public assistance if needed. This is another reason your sister has likely not taken any legal steps.
I strongly advise you to at least consult with a lawyer to find out options for pursuing this and making sure things are done legally and as your father truly intended. Either there is a will which leaves it split between you two, there is a will which leaves it all to your sister, or there is no will. In situation B, unless the will is obviously faked, you can just wash your hands of it. In situation A or C, you will need to step in to make sure you receive what your father intended.
If you have a copy of the death certificate and the will, I say go to a lawyer and press it to the fullest extent of the law. What your sister has done so far is inexcusable. I also understand that as executrix, she is accountable to the beneficiaries of the will (i.e. you). It is not up to her what happens with your father’s estate, and I think you should find a lawyer to make her do the right thing. I would not go back to the one who wasn’t interested; I would keep looking until I found one who is as interested in making this right as you are, because what she’s doing right now is just plain wrong. I don’t think there’s a real moral question here, except what is wrong with your sister’s morals.
