Neil Diamond UFC Women's Division Odds

No, that is not a bot randomly combining words. I honestly can’t say if this should be in IMHO, MPSIMS, or CS, so shuffle away if need be.

In my career as a Surreal Estate Developer I have been approached by a firm of English bookies to help them set the odds on an upcoming fight in an alternate universe.

The contestants are Cracklin’ Rosie and Sweet Caroline, who will be meeting for a three round bout under current UFC rules. I am in need of some guidance.

Cracklin’ Rosie is a storebought woman, solid fundamentals and no obvious weaknesses, but Sweet Caroline has flashes of genius, where the good times never seemed so good.

What guidance can you folks provide? A lot of money will be riding on this, but none of it is mine, or in any currency negotiable in this reality, so no pressure.

Sweet Caroline (oh, oh, oh) will get her ass handed to her. She’s too laid back. I just hope the ref steps in quick.

What about Desiree? Of course, if she’s twice my age, then she’s over a hundred years old, but if the match is just for one night …

On the other hand, I’d place my money on any of the wrestlers who are forever in blue jeans.

Rosie smokes, has tattoos and fights dirty. She will know just how Sweet Caroline is by gnawing her arm off.

Shiloh would be hard to beat, were she not imaginary

I’m gonna have to put my money on Cracklin’ Rosie for this fight.

Is tomorrow’s matchup Kentucky Woman vs. Holly Holy?