YEEHAW
I give it an 8 with bonus points for lions and defamation of Catholics.:wally
We’ve done this one before I think.
Ah well, its new to me.
I was unaware that Russia, Germany, and the Muslim world were named in Ezekiel as losing WWIII to Israel.
I really should read more Jack Chick. The man is so wise!!!
I also like how the Beast is doing the Devil Horns. I wonder if I’ll run into him at my next metal concert…
Yeah, sure, Jack. The Bible is infalliable because the Bible says it’s infalliable.
Okay, where’s that sawzall?
I don’t think the Pope wears the big hat when he’s signing paperwork. I think he just wears the little white beanie.
Yeah. OK. So, the Pope is the False Prophet. Or the Antichrist. Or something. And the Beast is, what, a Lutheran minister? It was obvious that the guy in the big hat was supposed to be the Pope (big hat=Pope in Chick Tracts), but it wasn’t clear who the Beast guy was. He seemed to be some sort of low-level cleric until SATAN entered into him (from the rear, I noticed. I think they’re implying something that… nah, they couldn’t be saying that. Could they?) Also, I noticed that Satan was wearing the Devil costume he had on at the Halloween party. Or was that Mike from the accounting office? It’s hard to tell.
Franky, I don’t get the yuks from Chick tracts that I once did. I really can’t believe that some “Christians” actually use them as witnessing tools. I actually read one of the early anti-Catholic ones and took it to heart, but I was like, fourteen, and going to a fundy Baptist school at the time. Any adult with two brain cells to rub together is just going to laugh at them, and, if they’re not familiar with actual Christian teaching, will probably get the idea that Christians are sick twisted ignorant (plural of vulgar term for sexual intercourse).
I have composed a Chick Tract Rite of Exorcism, which I periodically break out on this board when the need arises. I usually post it in the event that somebody reports being handed an actual paper Chick Tract. I may have to write an online version for the case of someone who is directed to Jack Chick’s website by some psycho cyberfundy.
Okay, I’m confused. Is it the Jews that are going to be sacrificing animals?
I heard Jack Chick is going to do a movie. Something involving panning over religous paintings while a narrator reads some religous stuff. But i can’t find anything on this.
Little “Fang” the doggie is cute.
“Jesus Attacks At Armageddon”
Wow, I knew it was a bad movie, but to anger Jesus?
Wow, what a work of genius and fine penmanship! I was just about converted until the final line:
‘Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and thou shalt be saved.’
I mean, all-encompassing paranoid bigotry and delirious doolally doomsaying I can take, but bad grammar is evil.
So, what I got out of this is that, when all those good people disappear suddenly as the Rapture begins, it’s going to look just like Nightcrawler teleporting in an issue of X-Men. All that was missing was a little * BAMF! * sound effect.
I wonder if Jack’s a fan? Bet he likes Phoenix the best…
And anybody notice how, well Hitleresque our good friend Bob looks? I got really confused about that. But of course I am not supposed to understand the “rapture” and all. Was it about the rature or raptors, there was another picture with those big birds and, oh hell, never mind I’m gonna be sacking cars and the like anyway after I get [foreboding music]Left Behind[/foreboding music].
Want to join my Mad Max-style band?
That kind of self righteous tripe pisses me off so much that I can’t even think straight.
ARRRRGHHHHHH!
Probably for the best, as I have nothing constructive to add beyond some rather creative expletives.
I really liked the priest with the dark glasses, looking like a mob enforcer.
I loved the big statue of the False Prophet doing the little hand signal.
I liked the heads on spikes along the wall. Nice touch.
Chick’s story kinda sorta reminds me of LOTR. That’s a great romp of a tale. Believable AND motivating.
It makes me wanna run right out and get a Bible and turn my life around.