Ah, grits. Yet again they rear their ugly head, causing dissension and strife wherever they roam.
I’ve lived in Alabama my whole life, and I hate grits. People are occasionally shocked by this. “Don’t like grits?!” they trumpet. “Why, grits are wonderful! Just add a little butter, salt, crumbled-up bacon and some cheese, and you got a meal that’ll stick to your ribs all day long!”
And therein is the rub of grits, for me. If you have to add all this stuff to them before they’re palatable, then the grits themselves obviously aren’t that good. It’s mashed-up corn, for pete’s sake. Who eats corn for breakfast?
However, Wabbit, I must inform you: You have two choices. To a born-and-bred Southerner, you can either be a Yankee or a foreigner. You ought to go to church every day and thank God we let you into the South in the first place. This “current” invasion of outsiders is worse than the last one. At least then we got to shoot at them.
Hmmm… first pit post for me… here’s a fuckin’ nod to Scylla and to the rest of y’all!
Wabbit, typically only youngsters sugar their fuckin’ grits. That’s probably why the fuckin’ DI yelled at you.
You’re in fuckin’ Athens and you go to a redneck bar?!? There’s a little university in that town… do yerself a fuckin’ favor and check out a few of the college bars. Is the 40 Watt still around?
And there’s more to the fuckin’ South than grits, mourners of the Late Unpleasantness, and sweet tea. There’s tractor pulls, wrasslin’, trailer parks, Dale Earnhardt shrines… hmmm… maybe I should have stopped while I was fuckin’ ahead.
Pacific Northwest here, central Washington area, and no, definately not Seattle. You mention grits to the people here and they think you are talking about sandpaper.The tea is iced tea, not hot tea, unless you are dining in a chinese restaurant and green tea is served.
I have never heard anyone here use the term yankee unless they were talking about the baseball team.
A war over slavery was fought years ago. The north won the war and slavery was abolished. I don’t understand why people still cling to the north and south issues, we are one united country. I too have been called a yankee when I was in the south on business. It didn’t bother me, but I did feel bad for the person still fighting the war.
It’s obvious from the OP that you aren’t a yankee but you definitely aren’t a southerner. The war has been over for years, and I find that it’s usually not the southerners that bring it up. Emblems displayed for personal reasons that have nothing to do with the war, a slang term, it doesn’t take much for someone to jump on the bandwagon and claim the south ‘needs to get over it.’ Guess what? The majority of true southerners have!
I love grits. I put salt & butter and occasionally maple syrup on 'em.
I say y’all, which doesn’t phase the Southerners but confuses the HELL out of my fellow Yankees.
And as far as rednecks go… y’all got your bubbas, we got our jethros. They’re just as bad. As a matter of fact the jethros can be worse.
Holy shit, it sounds like my hometown!!!
*[sup][sub]from New York, which usually prompts the Southerners I meet to ask how I like it in the city; approximately 50% are amazed, incredulous and/or flat-out unbelieving when I tell them I’ve never been to NYC and I’ve lived my whole life in a trailer on a dairy farm[/sub][/sup]
Hey now cow-poker don’t go claimin’ that we cool people of Colorado have anything in common with your backward-ass 50-thousand-people-in the-capitol-city 100-times-more-sheep-than-people-little-state. Of course we’ll stand right beside you with our guns drawn to keep out the Califurners and the East’ners, other than that we pretend we don’t know you.(well maybe for a quick trip up I-25 to Glendo every three day holiday). And don’t don’t think we didn’t hear ya call us greeny bastards as soon as our backs were turned.
Yes in fact it is. But don’t get me started on those Stipe-huggin’ townie-types!
Note to all that are taking this thread seriously: don’t; it was meant as a humorous take on these silly little regionalism’s which we seem obligated to create. I actually love Athens (like I said, no jackalopes) and will probably spend the rest of my life here not eating grits and not drinking yer goddamned sweet tea!
That statement is wrong on SO many levels. Figured it was only a matter of time before a Greenie bastard reared it’s ugly head in this thread…
Um, isn’t Denver part of California by now? Hell, y’all might as well shove off to LA to be with the rest of your crystal-hugging, Scientology-preachin’ kin!
Yea, well only a YANKEE would consider a pissant valley in Pennsylvania (or where-ever the hell it is: it’s probably a damn subdivision by now) more important than the 7th largest state in the Union–and the first one to give women the right to vote. Wabbit stomps off in a homicidal rage
To my friends in England, all us US of A types are Yankees. It does my heart good to see my in-laws turn beet red, with pulses jumping on their foreheads (they’re from Alabama) when my Limey friends greet them with a “pleased to meet ya, Yank!”
Okay, here’s a puzzler. I was born in Virginia and lived there for about a year before I moved to Michigan, where I grew up. Now I live in Missouri, which, if memory serves, was one of those wacky border states. So am I a Yankee? A Southerner? Some kind of half-breed? Please help.
Well, you’re definitely not a Yankee (b/c you eat grits) and you’re definitely not a Dixie-ian (what with the sugar thing and all) so I’d say you’re pregnant pause a WESTERNER! Welcome to the club, now lets go shoot something…
Damn Wabbit I could have written this rant. The only difference is that I’ve ended up back north in South Dakota instead of Georgia.
I found that while putting sugar on your grits was verbotten, it was acceptable to mix syrup with ones grits; luckily I learned this lesson while still in the 21st Repo BN.
Matter of fact when I was down range I was asked by a Drill if I was a Southerner because I tended to put my grits on my french toast and then put syrup on top.
As far as pilgrims in Yellowstone go, we used to make scoreboards and bet on how many pilgrims would bite the dust every summer.
So wait a minute… I move to Missippi in August; I love grits, and I eat them with butter & salt like you’re supposed to; does that mean that I can have my Yankeeness revoked once I move on the basis of my grit-eatin’, tractor-pull-attendin’, y’all-sayin’, trailer-park-livin’-in ways?
