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The fucking hockey players did not go on fucking strike. They were locked out. They made concession after concession and it wasn’t enough for management who wanted absolute cost certainty and so management LOCKED THEM OUT. I may have to raise my voice to the next person who talks about striking hockey players.
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HSHGF’s cat: get the fuck over yourself. Look, I like you. Well, I like you less now than I did when I met you, but I still like you. Yes, you’re a little over a year old, and yes, until now it was just you and her, but that has changed. STOP FUCKING SLASHING ME. You got presents before she did. I bring you treats, and drugs, and I play the fucking ping-pong-ball game with you for a fucking hour at a time. When HSHGF is in the shower, I get that feather-duster toy and shake it so you can bat it, tear around the house, come back, bat it again, and repeat for the hour it takes her to get ready. I put down the ping-pong ball, or the feather-duster thing, and try to walk to the bathroom to take my own shower, and HISS-SLASH-CHASE-SLASH-BITE-SLASH. I’m fucking bleeding. It’s fucking annoying. Cut it out. HSHGF tells you sharply to stop, and then you slash at her. She fucking FEEDS you. She heats the house in which you live and she brings you toys and plays beer-cap hockey with you all day. I’m bringing a fucking water pistol next time. I bleed, you drip. That’s the new fucking deal.
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We have enough snow. kthxbye.
The follow-up rant to my rant in this short-lived rant thread from a couple days ago:
I still haven’t gotten my movies, but I did get an email saying they were received back and new ones will go out. I never even got them, you bastards! To add insult to injury, I also got an email asking “When did you mail back (the movie that you never got)?” Fuckwits! Somehow Netflix manages to fuck up my movies EVERY YEAR between Christmas and New Year’s! How and why do they keep doing this? It works perfectly any other time of the year, except for the one time I have several days off in a row and am at home, wanting to watch movies! UUUUUGGGGGHHHH!
Ooh, I was just thinking about starting one of these…
Dear customers,
Is a simple “thank you” too goddamn much to ask for? Obviously even the most slack-jawed amongst you are capable of mono-syllabism, as evidenced by such highly-articulate uttereances as “huh?” and “yup” and “nuh-uh.” So after I look up your balance, and especially after I have to go to some extra trouble to find it because you can’t read your card number or forgot how to spell your name or whatever, a simple “thank you” would be appreciated as opposed to slamming the phone in my ear. Bitches.
Concession after concession? Bullshit. They refused to consider anything that would have even the slightest effect on controlling salaries.
Oh, while we’re on the topic of hockey, it seems as though hockey fans in Newark are little more interested in paying $70 to be bored out of their skulls then fans in the Meadowlands. Weren’t you insisting just this past spring that it was just playing in the shadow of the Rangers that caused the Devils’ woeful attendance?
FIL;
Thanks for the satellite radio. It’s ever so nice to receive a gift that we have to pay for if we want to use it :rolleyes: Double thanks for not bothering with a gift receipt , since obviously we wouldn’t want to return it for something else.
And on that note, stop trying to talk to my husband. If his sister wants to have a relationship with you, that’s her choice. My husband, on the other hand, does not. He would be perfectly happy if you were to never appear in his life again. Do not ask for our address. Do not ask for his phone number (Thank you SIL for not giving it to him). Do not pass Go. Do not collect $200.
However, a genuine thank you for getting arrested on Christmas Eve for drunk driving and giving us an amusing story to tell. Even if you did try to drag my SIL into it by claiming you were drunk because you were upset she didn’t invite you out for lunch after her graduation. Yeah, going to lunch where your newly divorced wife will also be present is oh so appropriate. Probably about as appropriate as trying to drag the one child you’re still on good terms with into your own problems.
We can put a man on the moon, but we can’t make a public restroom soap dispenser that will reliably, you know, dispense soap?
That’s pretty mini, but there it is.
That lane is right turn only. RIGHT TURN. ONLY!!! I know this because not only does the sign say it, it’s painted in big white letters 3 times in the lane.
It’s not a “sneak in here and hope someone lets me over to the straight/left lane eventually lane” and it’s not a “oops sorry I wasn’t paying attention lane” and it’s not a “I’m too good to follow the traffic rules here lane.”
Also, making a right in to this lane or on to this street does not mean you can just go whenever. You can’t go when the people across from you making a left on to this street have a green light. You can’t go when the cross traffic has a green light.
I’m sure the city has a little work to do with regards to this mess of intersections but dammit, THESE RULES ARE NOT NEW!
To the idiot Ron Paul supporters:
I think it is great that you are passionate for your candidate that is going no where. Have fun with that, you’re only 18 once. For some reason you think that putting a Ron Paul banner on every overpass will somehow change the outcome of the election. Fine and dandy. Everyone needs a hobby. However if you are going to make your banners on a sheet of Tyvex you should realize that air does not flow through plastic. You are attaching a sail to a chainlink fence in an open area prone to winds. Your very important sign becomes a piece of trash in about 2 hours. Please stop.
While on the topic of Ron Paul and his asshat supporters:
Bumper stickers are for bumpers. Don’t put the fucking things on every vertical surface you see in someone else’s neighborhood.
On December 9th I ordered some DVDs from Columbia House, and immediately received an e-mail from them thanking me for my order and informing me that I would receive another e-mail when it was shipped. I’ve ordered from them before and have always gotten my DVDs within a week or so (sometimes on the same day I get the notice that they’ve been shipped). This time, however, I don’t hear anything and I end up having to tell a few people that I’ll have to send them their presents when I get them. Today it occurs to me to check my account online to see if there’s anything about the status, and the order isn’t even listed!
So I check the e-mail I had gotten, and there’s no tracking info. All I can do is send them a copy of the e-mail acknowledgement of the order asking what happened to it, and wait to see what they say.
Tell that to my 57 year old father. sigh He says this is the first campaign in his life he’s going to actually go out and work for.
Thank you for the gift card to Vons. I’m a little non-plussed that I can’t use it to buy a gift card to Ralph’s, but one mustn’t appear ungrateful.
Although, come to think of it, Vons does sell gift cards to Best Buy (and so does Ralph’s). Maybe they can sell me a gift card to Ralph’s.
P.S I don’t really want to spend the card at Ralph’s. I want to use it at Food4Less.
To Comedy Central and TBS (“very funny”):
**Scrubs **is not funny.
Stop hitting on me, friend that I’ve had since kindergarten. I’m happy you’ve decided to come out and whatever, but seriously, stop fucking hitting on me. You know I’m getting over a breakup. You know I don’t like pussy. You know that not being left alone about this stuff freaks me the hell out, courtesy a freaking stalker in ninth grade. So stop doing it! It’s getting irritating and creepy.
And when I tell you it’s getting irritating and creepy, it’s not because you’re gay. It’s because you’re being irritating and creepy.
You mean that OWNERS showing RESTRAINT after getting a ROLLBACK wouldn’t control salaries? Of course it wouldn’t. Almost bankrupting one’s league would be enough warning not to overspend in any normal world, but not sports owners, oh no. They get a pass. :dubious:
The funny thing is, the new Prudential Center is only nine-tenths of a mile further from Madison Square Garden than the Continental Airlines (now IZOD) Arena.
I do think that the presence of the Rangers does bleed hockey support, but I certainly don’t think that it’s the SOLE cause, and I believe I’ve said all along that moving the team to a city whose majority demographic has been traditionally unsupportive of hockey would be unlikely to help.
Amen to that.
Also, Kia, your “Maniac” commercial is disturbing on many levels. First, it’s on way too much. Second, the groin thrusts that the salesman does are just… inappropriate. How does selling a Kia compel you to hump the air? Stop it!
Hyundai had the “DUH” commercial. What is it with Korean automakers?
To my landlord:
The whole point of setting up an online payment system was to streamline the payment process. Yesterday I found out that you’re working through two different Web sites. The payment I made through the first site (the one you instructed me to use) was supposedly processed on Friday, but has yet to be deducted from my checking account. The other site (the one listed on the paper billing statement I received this weekend) indicates that I haven’t paid my rent yet.
I don’t know what the hell is going on. And since you decided to take a four-day weekend, I have to drop off a check at the leasing office and hope that my rent payment isn’t deducted from my account twice (or that I get hit with fees for a late payment). Based on your track record of responding to resident complaints, I’m predicting it’ll be at least six months before I get any excess payments back.
Happy freakin’ New Year to me. :mad:
I am reading your rant, and I am cracking up! So, so fucking true!
Everytime that dude does the groin thrust, I’m thinking, “Oh, Lawd. Please. STOP!” I mean, I’m a very sex-positive-do-what-you-will person (i.e., I’m not particularly prudish about stuff that happens on TV, where one can just change the channel), and my reaction is still, “Eww, gross! WHY?!”
I don’t know–maybe if the dude were hot (to me), I’d feel differently (though the music would still turn me off), but, yeah, I’m not feeling it.
I just cleaned out my MiL’s fridge.
Jesus tap dancing Christ. There were four separate open containers of Ranch dressing, 3 relishes, 2 mayonnaisses, and a package of 6 shrivelled bell peppers that she bought because “they were pretty”. Newsflash: we do not buy am item of produce solely because it is pretty, but because we have a plan to use it for something!
Philistine.