Well, that depends, are you missing a box of handmade wooden dishes, made by my grandfather? 
If you’re just looking for an empty box, I’m sure we can make an accomodation.
No, It’s that one. Got it?
I think that might be the box I’m using for my little feline and radiation experiment. It either is, or it isn’t. But I can’t say for certain til I open it. 
My first car had a bad front end. Gramps, the previous owner, forgot that trees and mailboxes did not magically disappear from the sidewalks where he preferred to drive in his dottage.
The tires died fast due to uneven wear mostly eventhough I would rotate them monthly.
I was also a broke student who couldn’t afford primo tires.
I still ended up changing at least one tire every few months.
On the plus side, I can change a tire quite fast.
My mini-rant:
Dude, I’m fucking READING you your court order verbatim. No, I’m not lying. I don’t care if the judge promised you a rainbow unicorn at the hearing, it’s what’s on paper that counts. The reason YOU do not have a copy of this court order is because you WILL NOT GIVE US YOUR ADDRESS. We sent it to the last known address we had so shut up.
I’m NOT being mean, I’m just enforcing your order. Yeah, I guess it does suck that child support charges when you’re not working. Hmm, reading the order it states you CHOSE to quit a decent paying job and do nothing. You weren’t fired. You QUIT. You’re not in school. You’re not in work training. You’re doing bupkis. Well, you’re bitching at me.
sigh
Dammit, I can change my mind about my career if I damned well please!
Update on my broken tooth (cause I knew you were all putting your lives on hold until you heard 
): it turned out to be a good thing after all, because there was a tiny cavity under the filling. My dentist was able to take me right away for an emergency appointment (they apparently take broken teeth seriously in the dental game), and five minutes later, I was frozen to the eyeballs and all fixed up.
Related rant: hello, dental industry? Do you think you can get out of the dark ages when it comes to dental treatments? Needles in the mouth are so Spanish Inquisition.
Yes, I AM okay. To be honest, I couldn’t be happier about being fired from a job I loathed and yet still felt inextricably bound to. The only way I was leaving that place is if they kicked me out, and it was time to go. Now I can take the vacation I wanted to right now, and I never again have to enter that deathtrap hellhole. I am the happiest I’ve been in months. Stop acting like I’m pitiful or trying to be brave. I became one of the teeming millions today (after 9 years of lurking…), my life is already better.
Speakerphone. If you are in an office and can close the door, or if you’re on a conference call, then feel free to use it. But if you’re just a schmoe sandwiched in a cubicle farm, then not only is it unnecessary, it is discourteous to everyone who’s imprisoned with you. I understand that you like to have a good time on the phone, hence why you spends hours each day on it. And I understand that 60% of the content is usually work-related, so it’s not totally wasteful. Really, I understand. But you need to understand that you and your phone conversations are LOUD. And all that giggling and flirting and chitchatting doesn’t make it less so.
I’m going to bring this to you on Monday because I realize you’re just not aware that you’re being annoying. But really, I shouldn’t have to do this. I’m thinking most people would be conscientious enough to know that speakerphoning everyone who calls you is poor etiquette. But maybe you’re some kind of exception. Please don’t get pissy when I talk to you about this.
And while I’m on the topic of you, you can stop reminding everyone that your birthday is at the end of the month. We know it already and we’re going to give you a card and take you out to lunch just like we do everyone else. Which you’re bound to be disappointed about, since you’ve pumped it up like it’s a major important thing. I guess some might think it’s cute that you’ve alerted everyone in a 100-mile radius of this upcoming event, but I don’t. I think it’s yet another reminder that you think the world revolves around you.
I go into the supermarket on my way to work, hoping to get a sandwich. I walk up to the deli counter and ask the guy if I can get a sandwich. He points to the cooler behind me and says, “They’re right there. We don’t make sandwiches here.”
I point to the sign above his head, the one that says, “Custom-made sandwiches, $4.99.”
He turns his head half-assedly and makes some sort of a grunting noise.
I don’t think I’ll get my food at Dillon’s anymore.
Not that it helps after the fact, but my dentist uses a q-tip covered in gel that numbs the area around where he’ll be injecting the real anesthetic. So, some dentists have left the 14th century, if perhaps, not yours.
Fuck you, 8-ball! It doesn’t matter who I’m playing pool with. It doesn’t matter how far ahead I am! It’s always for naught. Even if I’m as far on top of my game as possible, you always throw my cue ball into one of the other pockets and make me lose the game. Even if the cue ball is nowhere near the pocket I shoot it toward, you call up your pocket buddies and tell them to hold up giant magnets just so my cue ball goes toward on of them. FUCK YOU!!!
That 8-ball IS a cruel motherfucker. For me, it just never wants to go in. I can clear all of my balls in the time in takes the other person to pocket one, but that just means I get to sit there and watch while they slowly clear the table of theirs anyway because THE DAMN 8-BALL WON’T GO IN.
Argh.
Dear Science Center food service,
A Caesar salad does NOT contain onions or tomatos. That is NOT a fucking caesar. There may be plenty of variations on the original recipe, but those are not it.
Oh, and do something about that little teenage bitch working the cafe over at the SportsWorks building. Heaven for bid she should actually have to do her job, rather than goofing off back in the SW area.
Her idea of a hot chocolate was simply hot chocolate milk-or at least, that’s what it tasted like. The version they usually sells is supposed to have whipped cream and chocolate sauce. I didn’t realize until I got back from the rest room, and started to drink it-the lid was on and I didn’t know it wasn’t included.
My dentist did that too. He was actually very good - it’s just that sticking needles in my mouth (or, in fact, anyone’s mouth) seems so barbaric to me.
Oh, speaking of loud co-workers, I work in what is basically a niced-up warehouse with about 200 people working in it with no walls. In other words, we all hear what everyone else is doing. The woman across the aisle from me likes to play the radio and talk really loudly on the phone (everyone else uses iPods so no one else has to enjoy your music). Her radio is on just loud enough so that everyone around her has to hear the sound of it, but not loud enough so we can actually hear the songs. You wouldn’t believe how freaking annoying that is. It’s like a mosquito buzzing in a tent, man.
Then there’s the accounts payable ladies, one of whom has the loudest shriek of a laugh I’ve ever heard. They like to get together and talk and laugh frequently, and the rest of the warehouse gets to hear it. Annoying as hell, too. You know, this place is making me realize that walls and offices were invented for a reason.
I know exactly how annoying it is. A couple weeks ago a supervisor where I work was doing this. I could tell others were annoyed also and finally I just stopped my calls and went and told him it was very distracting. He turned it it down and apologized but he’s a supervisor. If I played music at all I’d get bitched at.
Either keep the volume down so I can’t hear it at all or make it loud enough so I can understand the songs or part of my brain gets distracted trying to figure out the songs.
One of these days I’m going to get this proofreading thing right!
I’ve owned an air pump for over 20 years, not 10. But I have aired up maybe 2 dozen flats in that amount of time.
Every one of my relatives seems to know that I have the damn thing and they all say, “Gee, I ought to get one of those.” But they don’t.
I gave my daughter (the biggest offender) one for Christmas a couple years ago. It was stolen from her car and she never bothered to replace it. I just can’t win!!
At any rate, changing only 3 tires in 20+ years ain’t bad.
The flats have diminished since housing went bust.
Also, the police seem to have finally taken their eyes off the radar guns long enough to ticket idiots running below the speed limit who can’t load a truckful of junk properly.
I average a flat every 18 months in my own vehicles. I consider a tire that still has enough air to keep it off the rim to be “flat” if it’s below 20 psi.
People! Do I have to remind you again to practice our parking skills?
- The car goes between the white lines.
- If, when you exit the car, you notice the car is not** between** the white lines, see step 1 and start over.
3.Lather rinse, and repeat until the car is between the white lines.
The aboves applies even if you’re only going to be in the store a minute, fucko.
zenith I got one of those air compressor thingies for Christmas; it’s in my trunk right now!
Misty’s only getting worse, fast. We have to keep wiping her nose up, her fur is a tangled mess from her snorting into it, and she hasn’t purred once since the diagnosis.
That sucks. I’m sorry.
With your kind permission, I’ll extend this rant at the people deciding how big the parking stalls should be, too. I drive a Corolla; they don’t come much smaller than that. When I park between the lines, and the cars next to me are the same size, and they too are parked between the lines, and we still can’t get our doors open properly, the parking stalls ARE TOO FREAKING SMALL! When a Ford Behemoth parks next to me on one side with a Chevy Middle Finger on the other side, forget it. I’ll just pop the trunk and crawl in from the back. :rolleyes: