I shouldn’t be doing this. Really, I shouldn’t.
I know we were all warned in advance, but it just ain’t Monday without an MMP thread. All you’ve got is this, so it’s still not Monday, even though it is. Technically.
I don’t even have a funny story for you folks. My weekend pretty much consisted of raking leaves and being bored. Being bored isn’t all that bad, 'cause like that character in Catch 22 said, time drags when you’re bored, so if you get bored enough you can live forever. I was bored for a month this weekend.
Heh. I got nothin’.
Maybe I should just give you a bunch of hijack subjects, and you can hijack the thread. Not that it really had a direction in the first place.
Frogs
Tomato paste
Hat racks
Retiring the Concorde
Tropical fish
In-laws
Outlaws
Monkeys It ain’t the SDMB without monkeys.
High-energy particle physics
Star Trek
Trek geeks
Tennis
and just for me: skeet shooting
Do something with this. I dare you.
Hey, I’ll have a go at it.
I played intramural tennis my junior year of high school. I ended up in second place and I got a silver charm to put on my charm bracelet. I wasn’t that good - it’s just that when I was supposed to play one of the better girls, she didn’t show up, so I forfeited my way into second place. I liked tennis, and I knew the rules - I just wasn’t aggressive enough on the court. Plus I wasn’t in great shape, so I got winded easily.
Years later, when I was in the Navy, I learned to play racquetball. I wasn’t great, but I did OK. And it was fun. I had my own racquet. But, again, I wasn’t aggressive enough. I felt bad when I beat someone. So much for my career as a professional racquetball player.
Now, I don’t participate in any sports outside of sailing, and since we don’t race, I don’t think our sailing counts as a sport. More like a pasttime.
Ya did OK, Ex. Now be a dear and fetch me an orange, there’s a good lad!
I bet tropical fish don’t like tomato paste, and make poor in-laws. I know, I know- there are in-laws out there that could be classed as tropical fish (sharks, barracudas etc.) and do like tomato paste, but let’s not be silly. In spite of their long sharp teeth and killer instincts, these people aren’t technically tropical fish.
How was that?
I have read an enormous number of Terry Pratchett books this week, and my brain is starting to melt (that gets the monkey reference in. “Don’t say the M word!..”)
Screams as Librarian lands
I need coffee.
FairyChatMom seems to have out locations confused. She lives in Florida and asks me for an orange. Hello? Anybody home in there? I might be able to scrounge up an apple, but this just ain’t citrus growing country.
More pointless crap:
I managed to get my pants dirty before I even got to work today. That’s fast even for me. I usually stay clean until lunchtime.
How’s this? Whatthehell does “MMP” stand for? I refuse to go look up that thread someone else started in the Pit about enough with the freakin’ acronyms already. Does it have something to do with frogs eating tropical fish? With tomato paste? While playing tennis with Star Trek geeks?
If in-laws can’t have monkeys, only outlaws will have hat racks. But they won’t fit in the luggage compartment of the Concorde. That’s a law of high-energy particle physics.
You don’t have grocery stores there in NY, Ex? You think I just stroll out into my yard and pluck oranges off the tree? Well, despite the fact I live in Orange Park, I assure you, there aren’t orange trees all over the place. In fact, I believe there was a blight or a freeze or something some years back that wiped out all the orange groves, so all that was left was for Orange Park to become a bedroom community for Jacksonville. So the only way I can get oranges is to visit my local grocery store or produce stand. Which is what I did yesterday. But the navel oranges I got at Publix yesterday aren’t nearly as tasty, or orange, as the ones I got last week. Unfortunately, I can’t remember where I got them last week.
My life is so difficult.
ETF, MMP, as any Rue-fanatic knows, stands for Monday Morning Post. His Rueness typically starts the week with a post of such import that it manages to lumber along until the next MMP is due. With our help.
But he’s getting carpet installed today and tomorrow (so he said) so he may not get on line till Wednesday. In the interim, we do what we must. As did Ex. And so it goes…
Frogs
Tomato paste
Hat racks
Retiring the Concorde
Tropical fish
In-laws
Outlaws
Monkeys It ain’t the SDMB without monkeys.
High-energy particle physics
Star Trek
Trek geeks
Tennis
and just for me: skeet shooting
It might be fun to hold a skeet shoot in honor of retiring the Concorde. We could have monkeys and frogs shooting skeet and the Star Trek Trek geeks could be the judges and have their own tennis tournament on the side.
We could serve tropical fish in a rich garlicy tomato paste for dinner after the skeet shoot/tennis tournament.
I think hatracks would make great Christmas presents for the in-laws. Especially if the in-laws don’t have hatracks already.
We could also reform outlaws by educating them about High-energy particle physics, so that could get jobs and quit outlawing. Then the world would be safe. That is until they figure out that by using High-energy particle physics, they could break open the Phantom Zone and unleash Kryptonian criminals that would wreak havoc everywhere. You know, you never can truly reform outlaws.
My weekend was pretty good (neener! neener!). Friday night friends came over and we grilled steaks and played rummy. We also made martinis. Saturday I took a nap, played on my puter and at night went to some friends house and we roasted hotdogs over a camp fire and then made smores. We also drank beer. Yesterday morning I went to church, then went to some other friends for lunch. We hade chicken casserole, peas, asparagus, rolls and key lime pie. We drank iced tea. Last night, I surfed the net for a while then went into a chatroom and flirted with some big, burly men. All in all a good weekend.
And I bought some navel oranges when I went to the store Saturday morning. So, see I did do something productive.
-swampbear (liking that Ex is chipping in to make Monday more bearable)
Am I the only one with a picture of Rue head to toe in carpet?
Apparently so.
I had a sleep study done last night, because my doctor suspects I have sleep apnea (or, as the Buckner’s would say the apnea). I had 22 wire attached to various parts of my body to determine if my legs were jumping or twitching, if my heart was beating correctly, if I was breathing, if I was dreaming or if I could power a potato car with my brain waves (okay, maybe not). Then, all wired up and being watched via video, I was supposed to float peacefully off to sleep. HA! I say again: HA! I normally fall asleep quickly–in fact, I can pretty much sleep anytime (hence the need for a sleep study). Except when I’m suppose to put on a command sleep performance. Luckily, this is common, so I had a sleeping pill which I could take. Then I slept. Until the technician woke me up at 6:30 in the morning! That may not seem early to you, but to me, it’s the middle of the night. Well. not the middle, more towards the end, but still an hour and a half before I need to get out of bed on a normal day. According to the tech, I’m borderline, so maybe I won’t need to look like a fighter pilot when I sleep.
Now I think I’ll go take a nap.
Kallessa (while there is no substitute for Rue, Ex is a sweetie)
Well Friday night was Halloween in the neighboring town where my In-laws live. (My boss hated her inlaws so whenever she would refer to them she’d call them the Outlaws. It should come as no surprise that she is now divorced from that husband and no longer has to deal with the Outlaws.)
We took the munchkin girl there to trick or treat at a few of the neighbor’s homes. She has more candy than any 2 1/2 year old could ever need! Mom and dad are helping rectify that though 
Then when the candy is gone I have to get serious about taking off the baby weight!
Saturday we went shopping for scrapbooking crap. Since I can’t drive the hubby dropped me and the boy off at the craft store and then he took the girl to Home Depot to look at tools and stuff. Other than that he would never go near the craft store… except when he came in to get me he did find something he needed! He’s been building a weather station on our roof and he needed a box to mount the lcd display in so he could put it on the wall inside so I could know all the weather facts I needed at a glance. He’s considerate like that - especially if it involves heights, soldering and programming!
Sunday we were lazy and let the girl watch movies and we did laundry and dishes and stuff and played a few rounds of galactic battlegrounds.
Now you all know far too much about my life and I think I will go steal Kallessa’s sleeping pills.
Yeah, you probably are. But that shouldn’t stop the rest of us from imagining what kind of carpet is going into Casa DeDay and in what rooms. Personally, I’m offended the Rue didn’t bother to consult us about such a major decorating decision. Let’s let our imaginations run amok here!
I see a den - of course he has a den - where else would one have a computer? Anyway, this den most definitely has a thick, soft, plush carpet. In green. Kelly green. Except for the orange dog bed in the corner - Lucy needs her quiet corner, too.
Anyone else? What is your vision?
My vision isthis
with hot pink walls and a canary yellow dog bed and lots of blacklights 
In the living room I see gold deep piled shag carpet, a fuschia dog bed, lime green naughahyde sofa with matching overstuffed chairs, orange crates as side tables, a coffee table made from one of those big wooden spools cable wire comes on (stained mahogany) and lava lamps on the orange crate/side tables.
In the bedroom, powder blue indoor/outdoor carpet, a queen size bed with white footboard and headbord, a canopy of white gauze and a powder blue comforter with pink fringe. The chest, bed tables, and dresser are white with antique gold pulls. The mirror is round with little antique gold accents surrounding it.
In the dining room, brown shag carpet with a black laquered dining room table and four ladder back chairs. The end chairs are “captains” chairs, black laquered of course with a swirly gold painted design on the back of the chairs. The “china” cabinet is actually one of those put together press board book case things from Sauder [sup]TM[/sup]. It’s a set of three. Rue displays his collection of plates, utensils and glasses stolen from restaurants.
OW! OW! MY EYES!!!
Okay, 'fess up Swampy, you and Tanookie are really decorators from Trading Spaces aren’t you? Let’s see… you’re…Rick Rifle!, and Tanookie is …not Hildy, 'cause I *like *Tanookie,…ummm…Gen? Actually, I like you too, Swampy, but your decorating sense hurts my brain. OW!
I want to thank Ex for taking one for the team and stepping in for Rue. It was a fine effort. I have nothing to say about any of your suggested topics, however.
Kallessa did you wear your nice jammies for the sleep people? And how was K Falls?
FCM, green shag carpet is highly overrated, trust me on this. Whoever decorated our house, apparently sometime in the 50s, must have loved green. The living room has green shag carpet, (we thought it was brown until I shampooed it, three times) and pale green walls. Even the ceiling is green. But since our house is a 100+ year old money-pit, other things have taken precedence over the living room remodel, and we’re still living in a sea of green.
The ‘master’ bedroom has celery green carpet and green flocked(!) wallpaper. It’s next on our hit list. Then comes the living room, or the kitchen, we’re still discussing which. When I say ‘we’re discussing’, of course what I mean is ‘my wife hasn’t decided yet’.
I think I’ve said enough for now.
To my mind, any shag carpet is overrated. My first apartment had the blue-and-green mix shag - oh, how hideous it was!! But I didn’t suggest shag - I suggested plush. 'Cause I’m classy! And because plush feels sooooooo good on bare feet!
And after reading swampy’s ideas, I’m sure I’ll never ask him for decorating advice. Not even when he’s sober. Scary…
Oh yeah - and I imagine Soupo and Katcha have that cool carpeting that has roads and stuff all over it so they can “drive” their HotWheels all over the place. Because Rue must be that cool kind of dad.
Hey we have the carpet with roads and stuff in the girl’s room. She loves cars and trucks and planes!
Well, tanookie, that means you’re a cool mom!
Now if only my kids feel that way when they get older
So nice to know someone listens to me. thanks Bumbazine.
I don’t really have nice jammies, but I did wear a new t-shirt and a brand new (altough cheap) robe. My technician was cute, but married, so I controlled by flirt-o-meter.
K Falls was great–sunny and warm on Monday and Tuesday–warm enough to merit an after dinner ice cream cone, no less–and then on Wednesday afternoon, it snowed! Real, honest-to-the-gods, stick-to-the-road snow! The season changed in a heartbeat. A New York minute, even. Luckily, by the time I drove home, the roads were clear and not icy. I am a wimp about driving in snow and ice.
As far as carpets go, I’m a fan of hardwood floors and area rugs, but if I was going wall-to-wall, I’d want plush in a neutral to warm earth shade. And if I had kids, I’d do the walls with that paint that’s like a chalk board, so they could draw and then it wipes off. Then again, if you teach them it’s okay to draw on one wall, they may get confused about not being able to draw on all the other walls. This may be why I never had kids.
If you carpet the ceiling, you never have to worry about it getting stained.
I vote for tomato-paste-colored carpeting, especially if you’re big into Italian cooking and eating in front of the living room TV, watching Star Trek marathons with fellow geeks. You never know when some skeet-shooting fool will scare your pet frog into tipping over the hatrack onto the tropical fish tank.
I wouldn’t let the monkeys fool around with high-energy particle physics, though – next thing you know, they’ll be reinventing the 1920s style “Death Ray”.